Something More?

You are called to this mission Orson. The same for others of us who feel the voice of the Lord calling them to this challenging work. So few members of our Church are in a position to serve our disaffected brothers and sisters. Most members can’t go to this place to reach out to them without also falling off that same cliff. We are the rescue workers that face that darkness every day. The people we are trying to reach out to are very much loved by our Heavenly Father. They are soooooooo close to that next big step. They just need love, acceptance, encouragement, and a glimpse of light at the end of the tunnel. They need to be around the right people and feel that hope of reconciliation – wherever it takes them. In a lot of ways, I honestly don’t care where they go next as long as they let go of the anger and resentment. Those are poison to the soul. Everything takes us through the story God wants to tell us. The worst thing is to be stuck in a mire of anger and despair.

Those people can be here on this site. I still visit NOM at times. These people can be in our local wards, and among our family and friends. Follow the guidance of the Spirit, and be ready to reach out and share when it is time. They could even be members of other Churches or with no religious affiliation at all. The idea is to nudge people along in faith, to keep them moving down their own path.

Each of us brings our own story. Each of us can touch the soul of certain people better than possibly anyone else. My experience is with being on-and-off active for many years. I also have a strongly disaffected spouse. So in a strange twist of fate, I am the “faithful” side of our relationship. I have those viewpoints to share. Sometimes I stop and think how weird it is participating on FacesEast. I am probably more like the spouses that drive someone to that site, yet there I am helping people.

I never really felt like I “fit in” at Church growing up, so my life has been a middle path for a long time. I just became really comfortable and happy with it all in my mid-life. I know how/who I used to be. I really love how I am now. Sorry if that sounds proud and silly. I know it does. In spite of all my doubts and “intellectual” knowledge, I feel that the ordinances of the Church truly created a “magical” transformation within me. I feel reborn, blessed, anointed, and enlightened (or in the process of becoming those adjectives). I didn’t have that difficult of a “crisis” when I had to face the intensity of all the historical and doctrinal problems recently. My unraveling was spread out over several decades. I’ve basically been a little too much of a “free spirit” to crash hard against the rocks of reason. I have no taste for that idea that pure materialistic reason and black/white truth is noble. It isn’t practical or even useful at times IMO.

If I visited this site when I had that mindset I would have thought most people here were either intentionally bending reality or were simply emotionally dependent on the good feelings that they find in church (blind to reality – ignorance is bliss).

I fully consider the possibility that I may be just as you described. I’m glad that I learned how to not be so very clever as to think my way out of feeling good experiences. “The Truth” isn’t as noble and pure as it first seems. We will look like “sell outs” and people who just went back for more Kool-Aid. It is partially accurate. I hear that all the time from my wife. Yet even she admitted once or twice lately that the thought crossed her mind to considered going back. She said she misses that “pat on the back” from the Church that tells us we are good and everything will be ok.

Thank you! to all you guys that come here and help people. It means a lot to reach out and give from yourself, your light and love. People need that warmth, to hear the confidence and love. It helps them move their story along to the next chapter.

So we should all be who we are here. If Ray is the “resident apologist,” I love that. If Orson is the recovering absolutist, that is awesome! Hawkgrrrl … your views on some of the Church topics are inspiring. I love your sense of being totally comfortable with the quirky and flawed Church we belong to. I get a lot from reading the diversity of ideas and reconciliation strategies. This site is as much therapy for me as it is an opportunity to serve others.

You are called to this mission Orson. The same for others of us who feel the voice of the Lord calling them to this challenging work. So few members of our Church are in a position to serve our disaffected brothers and sisters. Most members can’t go to this place to reach out to them without also falling off that same cliff. We are the rescue workers that face that darkness every day.

Valoel, this is exactly how I feel!

When I was atheist, I really truly felt very absolutist that people who believed in God were just fooling themselves, that they couldn’t face life without God or that they were just comfortable in their worldview without acknowledging what to me was totally obvious. My BOM experience that led to my conversion was a big surprise to me. I really didn’t expect to have what I considered a mind-blowing confirmation that it was right.

Weirdly it didn’t change my feelings that much or who I am. I am still totally skeptical about things, even the BOM, even after having a big spiritual experience. All it changed in my case was my behavior and maybe my attitude. I still can’t quite get my head around the idea of God or the point of believing in God (being superior to not believing in God) on most days. But I also know what I felt, and I won’t deny that.

I STILL don’t feel like I fit in at church, and yet I’m friends with everyone there, regardless of where we have lived. I guess I’ve just gotta be me, and that is unique no matter who you are. I don’t see the church ever saying “What we really need is more people like Hawkgrrrl,” but so far they haven’t kicked me out either.

Very insightful points Ray, thanks for that. Thanks for your comments too Hawkgrrrl, somehow I missed previously that you had been a decided atheist. I have never had a huge experience that I would classify as purely spiritual, but I am collecting little things that I can toss into the “spiritual” bucket. Like you they don’t really change my foundational perspective, but maybe they elevate me a little off my foundation to give me a better look at some things.

Valoel, your label has really stuck with me. I’ve decided there is an essay inside me with the title “Recovering Absolutist”. Hopefully I’ll be able to get it out on paper in the next couple months. If approached in the right way I think it could make some people on both sides of the “fence” think. I know it would make my above mentioned friend think a little (not to convert in any way but to possibly understand the struggle a little better). Maybe this is what I was trying to grasp when I started this thread.

Thanks again.

Thanks, I will read that when I get a chance. I was just looking at your “bright night of my soul” and thinking there should be a link to it with the other 3 essay links.