The Polygamy Problem

The lying.

It’s more complicated than that. After coming to the belief that polygamy was NOT commanded by God I have a huge problem with D&C 132. My God does not destroy women on a whim. It is very incongruent with other scriptures.

But, in a way, the fact that JS never publicly taught polygamy makes me all the more firm in my conviction that it was not commanded by God. Was he or was he not a coward? I don’t know, but I feel like he would have publicly proclaimed polygamy if it was commanded.

Yes, it’s the lying that bothers me quite a bit as well. Also, I’m going to wait for hawkgrrrl’s comment on this, and I will state my agreement preemptively. She has fairly strong opinions on this issue (something about kicking people’s teeth in or something) . I usually get a good chuckle out of her disdain for polygamy!!

Also, to be honest to myself, I think there’s a bit of the stereotypical alpha male syndrome going on with Joseph and polygamy. I ultimately think it likely that Joseph came to view himself as a philosopher king, and succumbed to Nietzche’s pious lie idea. IMHO, much of his behavior, post 1830, can be viewed and understood in this light.

The BoM is something I still cannot completely explain away, so I have considered the possibility that The BoM is what it claims to be, but Joseph quickly fell into error after its publication and subsequent formation of the church. After all, that’s why the 3 witnesses left, not too mention many many others. In this vein, most of what occurred after 1830 becomes rather irrelevant, to be taken on its own merit alone. But that’s just an idea.

My concern and suspsicion is that in practicing a form of sexual dominance, Joseph Smith was acting in a manner common to many leaders of charismatic sects. There is very often an insatiable sexual component to the charismatic kinds of leaders. I think at its root was a need to make ‘acceptable’ the desires and actions he took, starting with Fanny Alger, by making it something biblical.

For me, the stuff about Joseph lying to Emma or the going around behind the churches back……this doesn’t really bother me in terms of my testimony. It bothers me just because I expected more from his as a prophet and a man of Christ. But, I have to remember that this servant of God was really a boy in many ways. He didn’t have the wisdom of a long life and years of marital experience to draw from. I think the Lord did give him wisdom and qualify him for the work, but I think these historical account simply shows that the boy didn’t know how to handle this commandment of the Lord. I think he did the best he could, but left much to be desired. And I wonder if any of the 20 something boys I have known could have done any better.

My concern lies with the principle of polygamy rather than the practice itself. I can see that God uses lots of “practices” to teach us or to accomplish immediate earthly needs. But when we start saying that everyone in the highest degree of the CK will be involving polygamy, then my heart starts to break. Doing the will of God in the flesh….disciplining myself to some unpleasant devotion….well, that is one thing. But this makes me feel that my worth as a woman is in question. That the comforts of the men….that the dominion of the men is more important. I feel that I am a tool of the Lord, not a beloved daughter. I have enough trouble with the good ole boys club in the church. Not looking forward to continuing that in the here after.

Now I know that this doesn’t square with all the other stuff the church teaches about the worth of souls and the constant battle the church has seemed to fight to get women to understand that they are equally loved and valued by God. It is just that polygamy throws a huge wrench in this effort.

At the end of the day, I don’t think we understand what it will really be like on the other side and I know that the church has stopped explaining the Lord’s mind on the issue. Perhaps it doesn’t matter anymore. Maybe this was never the will of the Lord. But if it wasn’t then it throws a huge question over credibility of the prophet. So, either the prophet is imperfect, or God isn’t the God I need him to be.

Just to submit a little food-for-thought, could we look at it from Joseph’s point of view as he described things…

**OK. I’m commanded to put this practice in place, probably as early as 1831 or so. I know what hardship this is going to bring others as well as myself. I also know my wife better than anyone and know that she absolutely won’t accept this.

I’m approached through the years 3? times by heavenly messengers, one with a drawn sword, telling me to implement this practice with severe threats if I don’t. I don’t want to, or know how, but I begin by explaining the practice/commandment and spiritually marrying a young lady living in our house.**

I don’t blame him for lying to Emma. I’m not sure that telling her a truth that he knew she couldn’t accept would have any postive outcome. I mean…what was he supposed to do? He couldn’t put off the practice anymore and he didn’t want to hurt his wife. I absolutely don’t blame him for lying to the public either. That only served to protect the people from the certain persecutions that would result.

The way us fundamentalist-types view it is that the commandment was first given to select members of the priesthood…later it became a law of the Church but, with the manifesto…it went back to being a law of the priesthood. We view it as a new and everlasting covenant…not a temporary practice until political/social pressures get to intense.

We, of course, recognize a separation between the priesthood and the Church that the Church does not.

All that aside….I do wish the Church would be more forthcoming regarding this history. It’s sad to see people leave the Church over something that might be understood if it were brought to the forefront instead of covered up. What good does it do to get increased membership if they are going to leave when they find out historical facts?

My 2 cents…

Of course God is the God we need Him to be. That is what (I think) Poppyseed is saying. The Spirit tells me that God is good, loving and merciful. He loves all women and men equally. Therefore, polygamy came from fallible men/prophets and not from God.

God is not a sexist, racist, murderer or anything of the kind.

I just want to share the reaction I am having to this thread because I think it helps illustrate what a problem it really is.

I find that I feel this need to post all the scriptural evidence I feel I have that proves polygamy not of God. I feel the need to be RIGHT and make polygamy be NOT of God. I find myself feeling somewhat emotional that others believe God demands polygamy for exaltation, some say salvation.

I’m discovering that my biggest problem isn’t what I thought (lying).

My heart is crushed by the idea that God loves his daughters less than his sons. My soul cries out at the very thought of concubines, 14 year old brides and neglected first wives.

So, as not to burden this thread with my passionate plea against polygamy I had to go blog about it. If you want to read it you can find it here: http://truthseekertoo.blogspot.com/2009/07/why-i-dont-believe-in-polygamy.html” class=”bbcode_url”>http://truthseekertoo.blogspot.com/2009/07/why-i-dont-believe-in-polygamy.html