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Okay, I tried not to type this, but I must. We are in debt to the point of drowning. I am sick of it. I feel like it has been like this forever and I can’t see the end.
😥 The van is in the shop-we’ve already spent $1200 this month on fixing it.
😯 We’re supposed to travel out of state in two weeks for my IL’s homecoming.
There’s too much month at the end of the money.
Ironic that you posted this but… this will be a non-faith-promoting story. My DW and I are in similar situation this month and had run out of money yesterday with no check till friday. Today our late arriving tax-refund showed up. We haven’t paid tithing to the church in well over a year. (we do our own thing, not ti-thing) I know this doesn’t help you because your name wasn’t on the check, but, hang in there!! Judging by almost everyone I know, you are DEFINITELY NOT ALONE!!
@swimordie I think the Lord has a hand in your life!! This, coupled with that story you recently posted about being late to pick up your kids has convinced me. I think you should seriously consider trying to be re-baptized!
@just me
I’m really really sorry. I have had extremely good fortune (blessings) in this regard and am very grateful. Please let us know if there’s any way we can help. If you lived in the Bay Area I would gladly come fix your van for you!!
swim, that is fantastic! jmb, you are so sweet. I am, in fact, extremely blessed as well. I just have to have a mini pity party for myself. We are moving back in with my parents next month (for more than just $ reasons) but I think it is hitting me. It truly is by God’s grace that we are not bankrupt. DH has 3 jobs and we still can’t make ends meet. It’s because he is self-employed and it is sucking money.
I tired of treading water.
just me, about five years ago, I made a radical employment change to be able to stop traveling all the time and spend more time with my family. The motivation was good; the employment result has sucked. I have been un- or under-employed for most of the last five years, and a business I started failed – causing me to do something I abhor, declare bankruptcy. It was a brutal five years financially. I finally started a new job last month that I love and should provide security long-term, but it required we move to another state – leaving a ward we haved LOVED for 12 years. There is a woman who has blogged about her husband’s extended unemployment whose site I recommend highly – as well as EVERYTHING she writes on BCC (Tracy M.). In fact, she just wrote a post there you should read. It moved me to tears. (“Prayer and the Plumber” –
http://bycommonconsent.com/2009/07/26/prayer-and-the-plumber/ http://dandelionmama.wordpress.com/ )With 1 million to 1.5 million bankruptcy filings a year in the US (2009 is headed towards record levels), you are not alone. We’ve been there, and unfortunately done that in that past too (about 6 or 7 years ago) when I was “right-sized” out of the company I worked for. It took much longer than expected to find a replacement level job. We just barely weathered my brief unemployment this summer … had the house packed up, the move schedule with the Elder’s Quorum, and all ready to go. A last minute job appeared.
On the bright side of all that experience, we’ve totally shifted our financial paradigm over the years. We have no debt, except for a lingering student loan of mine from a long time ago. We don’t owe money on a house (we rent), cars, no credit card debt, nothing. That makes me sound really smart and disciplined I suppose, but we are not. It was acquired the hard, painful way, not the smart way. I am like that with most things in life it seems.
Hang in there! The stress sucks. Just remember, all your stuff … it’s just stuff. As tough and depressing as it gets at times, you can really turn this into a positive change. The whole country is going through this adjustment.
It’s hard to listen to this type of thing when you are going through it, but you will look back at some point in the future. You will very likely see that you are better off making the adjustments. Whatever you have to go through, it will probably be a change for the better in the long run, and you will be happier.
Money stuff is so hard!! Ugh! And I am sorry you are going thru this. Money problems, especially debt, influences how you feel about yourself and adds so much stress to the mix.
BUT….I am glad that you felt like you could just say the truth out loud. What is it Dr. Phil says…. “you can’t change what you don’t acknowledge”. ( yeah….I just quoted Dr. phil. I may need to go throw up.)
I think it helps to just accept that your cart is in the ditch and then maybe will help you re prioritize how you stop the bleeding in the now…and then help lay out a plan for the future.
You ever listen to Dave Ramsey? He isn’t the only finance guy out there but I like his get out of debt plans. He tells the hard truth, but it is the kind of stuff that helps change happen.
Yeah, I have 3 of Dave Ramsey’s books and I’m listening to his show right now. I put our family on the plan years ago and finished baby step 2. Then I looked at the biz and realized the biz had continued to accumulate debt. Fast forward to now and we have depleted our emergency savings and are just trying to stay current. We’ve been in this mode for almost a year. We’ve been doing this dance for 8 years. I am just so sick of it.
Dave Ramsey is on the right track. I love him. I know the LDS church leaders also say a lot about debt. But I am very, very sorry it all just isn’t strongly enough worded and always comes with too many loopholes included. Debt is not spiritually helpful. Period. If you know what’s good for you, if you want to know God better, if you want to be happiest, if you want to practice trust in Jesus, if you want to stay unspotted from the sins of the world, get out and stay out of debt. Period.
Unpopular. Extreme. Unrealistic. Amazing. Get out and stay out of debt. If I knew at 25 what I know now, I would never have borrowed for a house or a car. And I feel super blessed to know it now.
Tom
Tom, that is the truth right there. I am so angry with myself for believeing that student loans and business loans are “good debt.” NO THEY’RE NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
There is no such thing as good debt. It all feels exactly the same. Bad.
Schneicky! Our health insurance is going up by $62 a month.
😥 BUT, they will now cover new boobs if I need a mastectomy! Woohoo!!!Many people don’t stop and consider the service side of debt – that every dollar I pay in interest is a dollar I can’t give to someone in need. That alone is worth being debt-free, imo. Good news!!! DH has been working the graveyard shift 3 nights a week (temp)—they had a full-time (temp) day shift open that he took! He’ll do that and shift around his hours for his office.
This will be sooooooooooooooooooooo much better for our family and sleeping schedule!
That’s great, just me. Nothing spells relief quite like S-L-E-E-P!!!!!! 😆 swimordie wrote:That’s great, just me. Nothing spells relief quite like S-L-E-E-P!!!!!!
😆 Yeah, and sleeping together.
😆
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