Prayer

I think I lost my testimony of prayer for a while. So I stopped doing it formally (morning on my knees and by my bedside at night).

I noticed a few weeks ago, while watching the sunset (we get a nice view from our house), that I was thanking God for a beautiful thing that makes me feel good. I noticed again the next day when I was driving to work and saw a mother deer and two fawns cross the road in front of me and I marvelled at their beauty and the trust the fawns had to follow the mother across the road even when it was dangerous. I thought about how beautiful God’s creations were.

I think I carry a prayer in my heart a lot more than I used to. Connecting with God all day long.

I do want to re-commit myself to doing it formally more often nowadays…but I think my most sincere prayers are spontaneous. I am glad I do not memorize prayers.

Hi Poppyseed,

I always like reading your posts. I love the geninune questions and sincerity of this group. It’s so nice to not be afriad to ask questions and have people look at you like some apostate. Prayer has always been a difficult thing for me. Because my mom was so mentally ill, she made prayer seem ridiculous. Her prayers went on and on about crazy stuff and were always the same. Yeah, we knew mom was nuts, but still, her forcing us to say these memorized prayers (or “I won’t give you lunch money for schooL) made us kids hate saying prayers. Only my dad kept us sane in regards to prayer. I do believe that God answers prayers and that prayer is mostly for us as God already knows what we need anyway. Gratitude and appreciation of what we have is a key to happiness and valuing things. There are times that I have had very powerful answers to prayers and other times I feel nothing. Sometimes, I wonder why it is so difficult to have communication with God. My dad and I were so close and if I ever had a problem, I could just call him and we would talk for hours. I wish it were like that with God. But, for some reason, this life does not allow that. We are told to read scriptures to hear God’s word or He can answer us through other people, books, tv shows, movies, music, dreams, visions, inspiration. Living by faith and trusting in an unseen God is not always easy for me. I was watching a Dr. Phil show the other day where he was talking to couples who desperately wanted a baby. He mentioned that there is evidence that shows that every thought we have can affect our physical bodies. So, I imagine that prayer and believing a loving God cares about us can relax us and give us peace.

This is beautiful. Thanks!

One more thing:

I love the idea that a song of the heart is a prayer. I love to sing, and I find myself singing whenever I’m not concentrating on something else. Filling my mind with beautiful music is a way for me to commune with God.

Interesting, I thought I was the only one who didn’t kneel all the time.

I find prayers of Thanksgiving very helpful. Gratitude is a key to improving happiness. Prayer is key to expressing gratitude.

I struggle with the rest. As far as ”asking” prayers go, there are a lot of prayers I feel have gone unanswered. Or, if as I hear in church, that the answer is ‘no”, then why is the answer no so often? There seem to be lots of ‘yesses’ for the same kinds of things given to other people.

When we pray for someone’s health in the ward, I find it hard think that God withholds his healing until we say the words and perform the ritual. Seems kind of petty to me.

I find it perhaps arrogant that we think our words will change God’s will, and that outcomes are determined by what we say in a prayer. That’s a big load.

Sometimes I feel like it’s less oppressing to just think that things just happen, rather than thinking God is at the root of everything.

My wife feels so betrayed by God with some of the things that she is going through, that she doesn’t say “Amen” any more at church, and otherwise.

I am of course a hypocrite, confused and weak. We do hold family prayer, on our knees, most nights and I think that has been good for our family. I think prayers don’t work, then find myself having lots of small prayers during the day as described in this column.

Sometimes I feel like it’s less oppressing to just think that things just happen, rather than thinking God is at the root of everything.

Amen. I heard someone say one time something like “it’s not God’s job to stop bad things from happening, it’s his job to show us that we’re still loved when they do.” I think even atheists can agree that everything that happens to us in life can be seen as an opportunity to learn or to grow.

I don’t really believe that God is at the root of every occurance but I don’t know if I can go so far as to say that He isn’t involved at all and that life just happens. I think God is very involved. I think the key is knowing how to accurately identify what parts are His and what parts are earthly conditions and which parts are just me. It is clear God is committed to preserving agency, but He has been known to stop a few dead in their tracks. I know He has been a much bigger influence in my life than just telling me He loves me, which in and of itself isn’t a small thing. I just mean to say that he is more than just comfort. Maybe this goes to that idea of really getting to know the lawgiver and truly understanding our relationship to Him.

There is something about humility that is bubbling up in my thoughts when I read this. Something about putting our lives in the hands of someone far more powerful and loving and then seeing the fruit of such a trusting relationship. I am also reminded of humility in the sense that one recognizes where ones power comes from. I think this ties into being “perfect in Christ” and the maybe the possibilities as we combine our efforts with that of an all knowing and all powerful Father who does stuff like moving mountains and parting seas and calming storms .

During this trial of faith..MY trial of faith, I considered for a long time that there was no God. That is was all a cultural fable and I wondered if I had been succered into believing it. I considered atheism and its focus and trust in oneself. I thought that was a pretty good deal for a while and started to explore the philosophy. It certainly felt safer in some aspects as I could control more outcomes without fetters without the precarious feelings of faith ……I thought. I didn’t stay in this headspace for long because God showed me a few things that brought me back to my belief and I must admit that it was a huge relief! I know I feel safer when I know that God is at the helm of my life. I know I feel safer when I trust Him with my concerns and my pain and all the things I don’t understand. I know He is blessing and leading me through this “veil of tears” and I know He sometimes waits for me as I linger too long in stuff like doubt and selfishness or even as He waits for me to be ready for my next lesson. And I know that I need to work on adding more gratitude to my prayers and my thoughts and my attitudes about what does happen to me. I think I talk a greater game than I actually play in this regard.

GOAL…..#1 Pray for real.

GOAL…..#2 Count my blessings and name them one by one.

oops, it was silentstruggle I meant to address apparently.

btw, silentstruggle…would mind sharing what things God showed you to make you believe again?

Bridg…I think it was me that you are addressing. At least it was my quote that you cited. The system just glitched maybe.

I am trying to think exactly what turned things around. It was a slow turn like a big ocean liner. It most certainly was a combination of being reminded of previous promptings, messages, and little miracles…..like when the Lord said to my brain spontaneously “put your house on the market today” and so I did and we had a buyer in 12 hours (the reasons why this was so important in my life would prolly take a while so I won’t bore you.) or the blessing my brother gave to me where he explained that Father had been with me and cried with me thru some of my darkest moments. And then it was current impressions when I knew God was speaking with me or blessing me. It was a struggle for me to finally make the decision to put my faith back into God because the “evidence” (i’ll call it that) that I had built my “dont’ believe in God” case on was still compelling and still encompassed many of my unanswered questions and grievances. I even wanted there not to be a God because it would have let me off the hook or given me this big giant mormon thing to blame for my misfortune and stupidity. If there wasn’t a God, I could walk away from the LDS church clean and clear. But…my experiences were profound enough that I couldn’t deny it any longer and I made the conscious decision to stop arguing and to put my faith and energy and trust back into living my life knowing that God would lead me. Even now, I can’t argue with my belief even when the temptation creeps back. It humbles me and bids me to keep moving in faith.

I think this makes me a little sad because I don’t feel the spirit like I used to. Lately it has been harder to hear. I think my heart is harder now. Not sure why.