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It seems a little strange, but I feel that I should start this introduction with a “Thank You”. Since this web site came to my attention several weeks ago, I have been absorbed with reading it and listening to the Mormon Stories podcast on Fowler’s Stages of Faith. (BTW, I highly recommend listening to all three podcasts.) For the first time I finally am understanding my life for the last 40 years or so. Disaffection:My dark journey through disaffection and disillusion was not because of struggles with Mormon Mythology. It was my reaction to my Texas Southern Baptist family heritage. My family has been committed Southern Baptists going back to the Civil War or earlier.
My Baptist family heritage was as dysfunctional as anything Mormonism can produce. They clearly valued the pedigree of their horses and dogs more than they did of themselves. Children were to help meet the needs of their parents. My disillusion with my family values and their Baptist religion started in late adolescence. In college I experimented with other belief systems, mostly atheism and agnosticism. It didn’t work well for me, so after about 10 years I started looking for a better way.
The Mormons found me:A friend and her family had joined the Mormon Church while we were in elementary school. Later when she went to BYU, I would occasionally talk with her mother. When I expressed some of my frustrations about religion and life in general she gave me answers that seemed more reasonable than anything else I had found. Eventually I was baptized into the LDS Church.
The Family reacted:My family was not pleased. Some would have rather seen me dead than Mormon. It was not pretty. But after 40 years nothing terrible has happened to me, but my family’s fortunes have turned a little sour. So most of the family has decided perhaps my Mormonism may not be so bad.
Living Mormon:Mormonism helped me to resolve my feelings of disillusion and rebuild my faith in God. As I was resolving these issues and learning about Mormon culture, I met a Mormon who was just entering his period of disillusion.
His doubt and concern about the gospel and how the Saints lived their religion was valuable to me because he helped me avoid getting entrapped by the Mormon Stage 3 mind set. Early on I learned the difference between the Iron Rod & Liahona. While things in the Church are not perfect, life in it is so much better than any other belief system I have encountered. After 40 years of more ups than downs in the Church, I still know this is the best Moral Compass and life style for me.
That same person ultimately became my husband (after 17 years). He is mostly in Stage 5 and struggling gamely. He recently introduced me to StayLDS. I am excited that it will be very helpful as I continue to deal with the Church’s warts and all while trying to “endure to the end”.
Brilliant! Welcome to the site. I am anxious to hear about your experiences and learn from your wisdom. What a fascinating perspective! Thanks for sharing some of that, and welcome to the StayLDS community. Welcome. I am looking forward to talking more with you. Welcome to the forum! Welcome Konvert Kid, it looks to me that once you get a bit comfortable you will be the one helping us and not the other way around, thanks for joining in the conversation 
I too went through the family rejection process and became the unmentionable black sheep but rather than from a religious family it was a completely agnositic lets-be-logical-about-all-this-silly-religious-stuff outlook. Looking back on it from about the same 40 years as yours I can see that it helped to solidify my Mormon faith because I had to stand up for it in the face of the most important emotional attachments in my younger life. It meant that going off to university meant that I was really living home behind and I would have to grow up fairly quickly. It hurt but I survived. I wonder how many others have had that sense of family persecution? (I know lots on this board get it from the other direction, from their Mormon family, as they struggle with projecting the image of the perfect Mormon).
I look forward to your ideas.
Welcome, Konvert!! Quote:While things in the Church are not perfect, life in it is so much better than any other belief system I have encountered.
I feel this way too. In Jane Austen’s Emma, Mr. Knightly suggests that it is one’s imperfections that can be one’s greatest attraction when you are matched with the right person. Your idiosyncrasies can be endearments. That is how I feel about the church (and my family!). I’ve grown to like the specific quirks for their bugginess.
My parents are converts, but from less religious families than yours. While my dad’s family was Baptist, they were from near Chicago and felt that church was a place for the family to make an appearance, not a big part of your life. My mother’s parents were Lutherans and cautioned my parents not to get “too religious” or to take religion too seriously. In a way, I think it’s good advice. Not that it’s not important, but that it’s a structure or support for life, not the other way around. I think having that balanced approach is helpful.
Glad to have you at the site. Might we know your DH? Or has he been a lurker, not a commenter?
Konvert Kid wrote:Early on I learned the difference between the Iron Rod & Liahona. While things in the Church are not perfect, life in it is so much better than any other belief system I have encountered. After 40 years of more ups than downs in the Church, I still know this is the best Moral Compass and life style for me.
Brilliant Intro, KK. Thanks for sharing. I particularly liked the quote above.I wish I had that moral compass years ago. It took a crisis in my family for me to let go of the rod and learn to use a Liahona (I’m still pretty clumsy with it and sometimes I cheat and just tell it what to tell me to do which isn’t really mature
😳 ).Welcome. Glad you’re here.
.Thanks Heber said
Quote:“… learn to use a Liahona (I’m still pretty clumsy with it and sometimes I cheat and just tell it what to tell me to do.)”
I certainly can understand how you feel. My Problem is being afraid to pray because I know I won’t like the answer. It is kind of like what do you do when Gods answer is Lose Weight.
Obviously I haven’t worked out how to do quotes but all in good time. I would love to say something bright and uplifting at this point but my brain is fried. Looking forward to getting to know you and many others in the future
KK
I liked how you put enduring to the end. Non-member family stuff is hard. I look forward to reading more from you, you seem to have a good take on how to endure.
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