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I would really like some feedback. As a woman who has been sealed to her husband it was a bittersweet day for me. As my husband is still sealed to his ex-wife because she and her new husband have not yet been sealed together. I feel this is a most precious covenant and the fact that Prophets or my husband can or have been sealed to more than one woman breaks my heart. It diminishes the covenant that we have made together and to the Lord and certainly makes it feel less special than it should. Also making me feel less special than I should. I do not understand how we as a church can say we no longer practice poligamy when in the temple we still do by allowing these eternal plural marriages. I am really struggling with this and would appreciate any honest heartfelt input I can get. Thank You Fwiw, Journey, women now can be sealed to multiple husbands after death – all husbands to whom they were married in this life. The stance now, in essence, is: Quote:We don’t know who will choose whom in the hereafter, so seal everyone to everyone to whom they have been married in this life.
There is no difference between men and women now in this regard – which is a step back to when “plural marriage” wasn’t just confined to polygamy. I like that, personally – for the following reasons:
My own take on this is pretty simple – but radically heterodox.
I don’t believe there will be “sexual activity” in the next life, and I believe that the creation of spirit children will be much more like a lab (I know that’s a weird description, but it’s the best I’ve got given our current vocabulary) where “intelligence” is imbued with personality/individuality and becomes spirit. With that foundation, it is easy for me to accept a “Council of the Gods” concept that will include my wife and I – and others within that council. Extra spouses from this life? Sure, why not? Best friends from this life? Sure, why not? Those who never married in this life? Sure, why not? The jerk down the street? Sure, why not, since he probably won’t be a jerk in the hereafter.
(If he is, let him be the mad scientist in the next lab down the hall.😈 )Now, that is just me speaking (although not “just me” speaking) [for anyone new to this site, you might not understand that joke – but don’t worry about it], but I just don’t worry about it at all. As long as I’m with the woman I love, I’ll be happy.
Which brings me to my last point:
It’s easy to say what you have said when you can’t imagine loving and wanting to live with two men with all your heart and soul. For those who HAVE been married to multiple spouses and loved more than one fully and completely, it’s just as hard to imagine being sealed to only one and not the other – and that’s true of both men and women.
It’s REALLY important in the process of reconciliation and peace to put yourself in the shoes of those whose lives are different than yours – in this case, those who are comforted unimaginably by the idea that they can be sealed to more than one spouse.That is one reason why I am ecstatic that women now can be sealed to more than one husband after death. That equality means a lot to me – even if those who allowed it might not share my view on the implications. 
So I must have been confused because my mother in law who was sealed to her first husband who was killed early on in their marriage was recently sealed to her spouse of 37 years. This all happened a couple of years ago and my husband and his sister had to write a letter to the First Presidency saying whether or not they approved of the request to cancel the sealing to their dad, so their mom could be sealed to her current husband. It was our understanding that the first sealing was canceled to allow for her to be sealed to her second husband? Which was very devastating to my husband who adored his Dad and always thought of his family as eternal. I always felt bad for his mom for having to choose when it was what life dealt her to begin with. Do you know of any literature that we could look at that explains this more clearly? Thank You Frankly, if she had waited until she died, then had someone seal her to her second husband, she wouldn’t have had to have the first sealing cancelled. That was the main issue – having the first sealing cancelled. In that light, my suggestion would be for your husband to have her sealed to his father (her first husband) after she dies (and after her current husband dies).
After all, just like all of our other posthumous, vicarious ordinances, we teach that the dead have to approve of them.Just because we perform them (including cancelations), it doesn’t mean they will make any difference – and that’s official Church teaching, not the Book of Ray. If it’s any consolation to your husband, I easily can picture his father saying:
Quote:“Nope, I’m not going to accept that cancellation. We’ll work it all out when she gets here.”
I’m sorry for the pain you have felt over this issue. Oh, this is “just me” BTW.
😆 I’m even more of a heretic than Ray.Therefore, I am not sure anything I would say about my current beliefs about the afterlife would help comfort you.
I will say that the sealing that was cancelled will be done again after your MIL dies, like Ray has said.
For those with a traditional LDS view of the afterlife I would hang my hat on the “agency” hook. No one will be in a situation that they are not happy with. Oh, I also think it is in error to think of small nuclear family units to the exclusion of others. Example, my best friend had a child with a man she is no longer married to. She is now married to a wonderful man with 3 more children. Her oldest son is sealed to his mom and stepdad.
In a traditional view I would say there is NO WAY that her son will not be able to have contact with his birth father. There is no reason that he won’t be able to be with both.
I think of the symbolism of sealing as chainmaille or a web rather than a single chain.
If you feel your marriage is diminished then I would have a private commitment ceremony. You and DH can create the words of the ceremony to exchange with one another. Give yourself what you need.
My views are very much in line with Ray’s. The concept of “sealing” has gone through many permutations since Joseph Smith first started contemplated this idea. It’s gone every direction from traditional nuclear families, to even having non-biologically related men sealed to other men in a patriarch-spiritual progeny relationship. I like Just Me’s comparison to a web or chain mail (instead of a single chain), having always had difficulties personally with a strictly focused view of sealing. I mean if you really think about it, our children are only children for a short period. They become our peers as adults — more like very close friends with a special bond. I thought about this as a young adult. I think about it even more now that our oldest has left home and is on his own.
My hope (and even strong belief) lies in the understanding that we will gravitate to and be with people we love. That seems very natural to me. I also see a powerful idea in becoming personally complete as eternal and divine beings, not having a real “need” to possess others in order to feel whole. We will be whole and glorious farther in our progression.
Old-Timer wrote:
It’s easy to say what you have said when you can’t imagine loving and wanting to live with two men with all your heart and soul. For those who HAVE been married to multiple spouses and loved more than one fully and completely, it’s just as hard to imagine being sealed to only one and not the other – and that’s true of both men and women.It’s REALLY important in the process of reconciliation and peace to put yourself in the shoes of those whose lives are different than yours – in this case, those who are comforted unimaginably by the idea that they can be sealed to more than one spouse.That is one reason why I am ecstatic that women now can be sealed to more than one husband after death. That equality means a lot to me – even if those who allowed it might not share my view on the implications. This is very interesting to me. When my older brother married his present wife 30 years ago, I cried at their wedding because she had been sealed to her first husband who had died. I thought my brother would be cheated out of an eternal marriage with a woman he loved. This wife had no children with her first husband of 14 years but has had one child with my brother. This woman loved her first husband and she loves my brother as well. So, now you are saying that she can be sealed to my brother as well if he dies? The problem is that she loves both men and both men love her, so if both men want her and she them in the next life, will that be allowed? I do not see why not? I know we can love more than one person and there are lots of people we could be compatible with.
Well, I hope there is no elimination of sex in the next life. If we have resurrected bodies with perfected organs and couples bond emotionally from sexual initimacy, I hope there is sex but ten times better than on earth. Man, do we get into deep subjects here or what?
Bridget
Oh, gosh, you just have to feel sorry for some of these poor suckers who will be sealed to a dozen or more wives. Hah! Honey, get me this, honey get me that, I need, I want,
My great great grandfather was Samual Rose Parkinson who had 2 wives. He would count every single cherry in the bag to make sure that each wife got the exact same amount of cherries. One year, a business friend gave him a turkey for Christmas. He nearly died trying to figure out what to do with that turkey.
Don’t worry, Bridge. They’ll have eternity to count cherries.
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