Born again?

I’ll share a continuation of what I said on another thread.

When I sat in my bishops office, explaining the reasons that I had just handed him my letter of resignation, I had a very “born again” moment. The concept had crossed my mind in the days between deciding to resign and actually doing it. But in that moment I told the bishop “I have now placed my salvation in the hands of the Savior alone”. No intermediary, no middle-man, no prophet, no church, no ecclesiastical leader, in some ways, not even myself. I felt that overwhelming wave of emotion that comes with the deep recognition of transcendent thought. What we often refer to as the Spirit.

I never felt closer to the Lord. I was embarking on a journey, wherein I felt deeply and strongly that it was just me and Him. I broke the shackles of expectations, embraced the light that He had given me, and now, I walk alone.

I’ve since recognized the importance of this lone journey. Everything spiritual is personal, individual. People can project their own idiosyncrasies of certainty or Truth on others but all things spiritual are unknowable. In fact, that’s what makes them spiritual: they transcend the knowable, tangible. This recognition has allowed me to create my own individual spirituality, exercising it with mormons, catholics, addicts, whoever. I have become the church of one: me.

This is a gross oversimplification but it works so well for me at so many levels. And, I trust myself now in the same way that Christ, the concept, trusts me.

I have felt “born again” within the Church, but it’s been largely since I started focusing directly and consciously on becoming more Christ-like – and it’s very interesting to hear the general leadership use that term (“born again”) MUCH more often in the last decade than perviously. We’ve taught about becoming Christ-like since the beginning of the Restoration, but we’ve embraced the born-again terminology only recently.

So, my personal input is that it absolutely can happen within the LDS Church. It just has to be an individual commitment – like I believe it should be.

(I also will add that I believe very few “immediate / sudden re-births”, if you will, last for very long. Those, imo, generally are the result of emotional experiences, rather than spiritual ones.) Usually, in the cases that last that appear to be sudden, the person has been contemplating repentance (even if not calling it repentance) for some time prior to the final experience.

sorry to thread-jack eu. I guess I can make any topic be about me… 😳 😳

I think that that idea of a “born again” experience is a transcendental one. Which to me, would make it available in any context where we are tapping our own transcendental thought processes: movie theater, concert, religious meeting, etc. In my own mind, we can only limit ourselves by shame, guilt, expectation, fear, and, maybe, ignorance. Otherwise, the world is our oyster…

As for technical limitations, ie, excommunicable actions, I guess, in my mind, it’s choices: life will teach you what you should learn, regardless of how much you try to control outcomes.

No need to apologize swim, I thought you were on topic.

I guess I’m not really asking whether or not everyone, or even on average people could have a “born-again” experience within the church. I also do not necessarily believe that the LDS church prevents people from having such experiences (though Shawn seems to think otherwise).

I am really asking about me (or you, or any one individual). In other words, how might I reasonably conclude that Mormonism is the best mechanism for nuturing my spirituality if I haven’t tried other mechanisms? I actually do agree with HiJolly that we are usually most comfortable in the tradition in which we grew up in, but maximum comfort does not necessarily imply maximum spiritual experiences (though I believe they are correlated).

This is a question that only I can answer for myself, but my tradition, in many ways, prevents me from doing that. Should I merely settle for what I’ve got and deny the chance that there could be something better for me? Should I resign my membership and go on a spiritual journey and leave open the possibility of returning to Mormonism when I actually choose it as being the best for me?

I guess perhaps I am just wondering aloud whether or not I am focusing my energies on the right thing. Up to this point I have, in some sense, concluded that no church is true (or that they’re all true, however, you want to look at it). The thought has occurred to me that I could easily be wrong. Perhaps there is a “true” church out there for me, and I will never find it given my current modus operandi.

Anyway, thanks for all the thoughts.

My own answer could be pasted from the thread about revelation, in essence – but I will add one thing that comes directly from my life’s expereinces:

When I graduated from college, I intereviewed for a job that, through a very clear answer to a direct prayer, I thought I would be offered. I knew it was the best job available for me – and it was. However, I was not offered the job – and I was grateful quite quickly in short-term hindsight. When I questioned why my answer had been SO clear (that the job was the best one for me) and yet I had not been offered the job, I was able to understand that the job would not have been best for my family – and the answer I had received was the correct answer to the question I asked.

The issue was that I was more than “me” at that point; I was part of “us”. I had a wife and three children. Looking back on the job I was offered later, it was perfectly clear that we were where we needed to be at the time – even though that job lasted FAR more briefly than I had anticipated. You see, we discovered one of my sons had a speech issue that could have caused major problems – but the mother of two of my students happened to be a renowned specialist in that exact area. She worked wtih him free of charge as an expression of thanks for what I was doing for her children.

What is the “miraculous” or “necessary” part of this? This is the same child who was told in his baby blessing, for no apparent reason, that none of the physical trials he would face in life would have the power to derail him from his appointed mission in life – and the job that was best for ME would have derailed him in a significant way. My job at that point, and every job I’ve had since then, primarily was not about me as an individual; it was about me as an individual AND husband and father and associate and friend.

My life hasn’t turned out anything like I thought it would while I was attending Harvard. My grandiose dreams from those years lie dead on the floor of my life – but I wouldn’t trade my life for those dreams or anything else. I’ve created my life, and it is a joyful life – but it’s only a joyful life because I’m committed to making it so in the context of my entire, full, complete life that includes my family, my community and my church.

Would I be more invigorated or more enlightened or anything else like that if I left my family or my community or my church? On a purely individual level, sure – I can see that possibility. I don’t think I’d be happier, though – because I’ve created the life I want and love. I also don’t know of anything I can experience outside of my faith that I can’t experience inside my faith – at least nothing that I want to experience that would compromise my full life.

Name something you might want to do and ask yourself:

Can I do this without compromising my full life – and without harming those I love?

If the answer is, “Yes” – then do it. If the answer is, “No” – then ask yourself why not. If you can’t articulate a good reason, then consider doing it. If you can, then don’t do it.

I know that might appear simplistic, but I really believe there is MUCH we don’t do that is fine to do – and there is MUCH that is pursued in the name of personal enlightenment that should not be pursued at a particular time by particular individuals in their particular circumstances. Many of those things might be fine for others, but I’m not living others’ lives. I’m living mine.

Take a look at my most recent charity post (“Charity Does Not Behave Itself Unseemly”) for a little more about this general response.

I was also VERY touched by Shawn McCraney in his interview. I would never have understood him if I had seen him doing his regular show, being all dramatic. I had the deep impression while listening to him that he truly had to leave the Church in order to get past some serious blockages in his spiritual journey, and that was OK. I think he presents a healthy, but obviously biting and pointed, criticism of the LDS Church. It’s good in some ways to be challenged by someone like that.

FWIW, I have been “born again” twice. The first time was around the age of 20 when I gave up my worldly self, my attachment to suffering and a lot of other things broke. The person I was prior to that died, and I was seriously a new person in so many ways, the only way I could describe it was being born again. I became a different person.

The second time was when I became friends with God. That happened more recently in middle age. I have an overwhelming sense of acceptance and unconditional love. It doesn’t mean I am not a screw up, because I am still. It’s just a sense that everything will be OK in the end, really it will. I want to be happy and fill the measure of my creation. It is a very conscious desire. God is patient, infinitely patient.

Both times being born again happened for me within the context of the Church. So my personal experience, and observing others, tells me that this can happen inside and outside the Church. I’m not sure it matters so much where it happens, just that people experience these types of changes. I think it happens a lot for people in different ways in our Church though.

I looked the The Life and Teachings of Jesus and His Apostles manual up online,

http://institute.lds.org/manuals/new-testament-institute-student-manual/nt-in-02-2-5.asp

The bit I’m referring to is italicized, and begins “David’s father was president of the stake…” etc This is NOT how I would interpret the experience at all.