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My New Year’s Resolution this month is to “set my heart less upon the things of the world”. I should have thought more about the implications of that resolution before I set it.😯 Seriously, it’s not been a good month, thus far, in many respects – and all of them deal at least in some way with my resolution. It’s like God said:
Quote:You want to set your heart less upon the things of the world? OK, buckle up, ’cause when I get done with you this month, you’ll have less upon which to set your heart than you ever imagined a couple of weeks ago.
I’m not going to detail everything here, but higher than expected costs for various things aren’t the biggest part of it – nor are they the hardest to handle emotionally. Money? That’s been a trial. Honor of the world? Check. Ego? Check. Recognition? Check. You name it, if it deals with this resolution, it’s hit over the last couple of weeks like a personal resolution tsunami.
I still have two weeks to go this month. I’ve never rescinded a New Year’s Resolution since I started this effort almost four years ago, but . . . it’s tempting this month.
All I can do at this point is strap myself in and hope I’m a better person somehow at the end of the month than I was at the beginning.
After all, that was the point of the whole resolution process when I started, so I probably shouldn’t complain when I picked a resolution like this one.In the office of a business man, writes Norman Vincent Peale, I learned of a number of difficulties he had overcome. So I said, “John, how come you were able to handle all you have been telling me about? These troubles would be sufficient to overwhelm many people.” He pointed to a vase in which was a big thistle. “Why a thistle? Couldn’t you get a more exotic flower?”
“Oh,” he replied, “since I experienced all those difficulties the thistle represents qualities most people do not recognize…. Tell you what, take a hold of that thistle.” he directed.
“I don’t like the looks of it; it’s spiny; it will sting and hurt.”
“Go ahead,” he urged, “take hold of it.”
Hesitatingly I reached out and gingerly touched it. “It pricks,” I complained.
“you must be more of a philosopher than that,” he said. “You see, the thistle represents the difficulties of life. And if you know how to handle a thistle, you have learned a primary step in handling difficulties. So grab that whole thistle; grab it hard.”. I did and, believe it or not, it didn’t hurt a bit. It crushed in my hand.
Of course, the incident does not mean that difficulties, when you stand up to them, won’t hurt. But they will hurt far less if you handle them forthrightly. When you have a difficulty with which you must cope, don’t hold off; grab it, deal with it.
My wife and I implement the “month of no spending” at times to separate our hearts from wordly goods. No dining out, no discretionary purchases, no spending other than basic necessities. It is HARD. The first two weeks were relatively easy, but then, the old WANTER kicks in and it hurts. I hear you — although I don’t really know exactly what you are abstaining from (I have a bit of an idea) I think I can empathsize somewhat. And a bi-product of this month of no spending is deeper empathy for people who are on a permanent shoestring budget.
We had a woman who was on Church assistance. This was a chronic problem in her life as a single mother with several kids and a job that kept her busy, but still was insufficient for basic needs. One day she showed up at Church and had gotten her hair done — something estimated to cost about $50. Major judgmentalism reared its head in the Ward Welfare meeting — perhaps even a bit from myself.
After our month of no-spending, I realized why she did it. Every day she would look in the mirror and wish her hair was different. She would check herself, and deny herself the pleasure of a visit to the hairdresser. This would go on for months at a time, so when she had a bit of extra cash, she quenched that desire for a different look and spent the money, even though she wasn’t entirely self-sufficient.
Also, another thing our month of no-spending showed us… as soon as the 1st of the next month rolled around, we ALL went out and spent some money on something that was an extra — the demand was pent-up so much. That helped me understand why people on tight budgets may even seem to lack the ability to save or to even wait for gratification — they’ve been waiting for gratification for a much longer time than most peole who are awash in cash do, given their lack of funds.
I heartily recommend a month of no-spending to anyone who wants greater empathy for people who have little. You’ll not only find yourself living more apart from the world as Ray may be trying to do, you’ll also gain deeper empathy for others. Best do it in February because it’s a short month. It hurts.
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