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cwald sent me a PM saying we have a problem with Mike M and his intro thread, “Any Thoughtful Suggestions?”. He titled his PM to me “Troll”. Both of us responded very directly. I hope it dies a quick death in a manner that is straightforward and direct. I left it open to see how the comments would flow, mostly in the hope that we would have a thread where we can prove to lurkers and visitors that we really aren’t a bunch of apostates, but I want everyone to keep an eye on it and shut it down or even delete it if it gets ugly. I might not be able to check it until late tomorrow night, so I’m a bit concerned.
Wow. I think his hot tub paragraph crosses the line and violates our rule against graphic description of sexual activity. That could all have been summed up in a sentence or two questioning the “swinger” lifestyle. I think he wants to write about his activities in detail, which is wrong for our community. I’m going to move it into the parking lot, if you guys don’t mind.
I like the idea of dealing with this person and telling them they are wrong, showing we do actually uphold some level of standards (not being total “apostates”).
How about I take this whole section of text and summarize it in a sentence, clearly labeling my edit as coming from a moderator? That whole part is unnecessary for our discussion. It is just the lurid details. I will replace it with “[Moderator edit: deleted graphic description of polyamorous encounter/s, violation of our community rules of etiquette]”
Quote:Last fall, we were over at a friend’s house for a work party. There were lots of people there who I didn’t know. As the evening wound down, those remaining were invited to the hot tub. It started with about 10 people, talking about all sorts of things and sharing personal stories and interests. As time went on, more and more people left. Eventually even the hosts went in and told the four of us remaining that we could let ourselves out when we were ready to go. None of us had been drinking by the way. We don’t drink. There was no alcohol at the party. Well, the conversation got so intimate . . . I won’t go into details, but eventually the other husband said to his wife (quietly enough that he didn’t know that we heard it), that he thought it would be hot for his wife to kiss my wife. I was getting ready to give a sideways glance at my wife when I heard that, but before we could even discuss it, the other wife had moved over to my wife and was kissing her. It was the second greatest shock of my life! The greater shock was that my wife was reciprocating it!
Now, mind you, we had NEVER discussed anything like this. And if you’d asked me 10 minutes before if this was ever a possibility, I would have said absolutely not! But here we were in this hot tub with strangers with our wives making out and groping each other. After a few seconds of that, the wives separated and we just flushed. The other wife, not embarrassed at all, said, “well, we’ll have to continue this another night.” I think they could tell that we were shocked, but not annoyed. We were stunned to silence, but in an OK way. They excused themselves and we were left alone, just the two of us, in the dark in the hot tub, where we proceeded to have some of the best sex of our lives.
Let’s jump to a few months later. By this time, we’d had sex with them and a few other couples.
In all honesty, I don’t know what the topic is to be discussed. It sounds like they are swingers and they’d like to know if that is OK and stay active in the church. I’m OK if Mike M wants to chat with us on topics and share his views of church stuff, as long as he doesn’t refer to details of sins he is committing.
Quote:I’m not looking for . . . actually I don’t know that I’m looking for. Maybe just someone with fresh eyes. I’m not really distraught or in conflict. I’m actually quite content. But maybe there’s someone more intelligent than I who can express well a comment that will help me lock things into place.
I just don’t understand what the point of that is. The 1st 2 paragraphs are OK as a intro if we want to tell him he can post that as a quick intro, and then he can add to discussions appropriately, but the whole rest of the post is just about his sins and he’s not really asking how to reconcile it.
I think less is better.
I like the editing suggestion, and I kind of want the thread to be visible to conservative members and anyone from HQ who reads it. I’d rather let it stand in edited form and then lock it (and perhaps even delete a comment or two) so it remains visible, if it can’t be controlled. I already sent him a PM explaining our taking it offline. I will do the edits and push it back over to public view. I also recommend we lock it soon and delete any comments we don’t like.
Woah, that deleted section was a bit much for my naive middle-aged ears. 😳 I also don’t know what to make of it – real or troll or something else, but I agree with your actions and comments.
We have almost a dozen comments, and it’s been good so far – but afterall’s comment easily could take it in a messy direction. I locked it, with an explanation of why I did so. If anyone wants to add a comment, feel free to unlock it then lock it again.
Let’s leave it locked and move on. It’s probably a troll, a trap or a perv anyway. Mission accomplished. We turned it around for our benefit. Let’s leave well enough alone now. Mike just posted a comment in the afterlife thread that said, essentially, “The LDS Church better be the best option in the entire world, if it’s going to baptize people against their parents’ wishes and if there isn’t an afterlife.” I sent him a PM explaining why I deleted that part of his comment (focusing on not letting irrelevant, negative threadjacks totally derail the topics addressed in posts) and telling him he is on thin ice after his intro post.
Well done, Ray It was worth a try, but not a fit. Our community is not a good fit for MikeM. I think I am done trying. Good call Ray. I also banned his account. I don’t see him becoming productive. It doesn’t seem like he has faith issues that much, the kind we support.
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