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We have a thread in our archives about a post on Times & Seasons that offered a new analogy for repentance – to replace the terrible ones about licked/handled cupcakes, chewed gum and a nail in a board. Most of the comments in the thread are just complimentary statements, and Roy provided the link in his post here (search for “Gold Coin” if you want to read it and see the link), but I want to provide something Elder Holland said about the nail in the board analogythat was excerpted in a comment in the original thread. I love the way Elder Holland phrased it, and I am SO happy that an apostle addressed the analogy directly and refuted it so forcefully:
Quote:We learn that when repentance is complete we are born again and leave behind forever the self we once were. To me,
none of the many approaches to teaching repentance falls more short than the well-intentioned suggestion that “although a nail may be removed from a wooden post, there will forever be a hole in that post.” We know that repentance (the removal of that nail, if you will) can be a very long and painful and difficult task. Unfortunately, some will never have the incentive to undertake it. We even know that there are a very few sins for which no repentance is possible.
But where repentance is possible and its requirements are faithfully pursued and completed,
there is no “hole left in the post” for the bold reason that it is no longer the same post. It is a new post.We can start again, utterly clean, with a new will and a new way of life. Through repentance we are changed to what Alma calls “new creatures.” (Mosiah 27:26.) We are “born again; yea, born of God, changed from [our] carnal and fallen state, to a state of righteousness, being redeemed of God, becoming his sons and daughters.” (Mosiah 27:25; see also Mosiah 5:1–12.) Repentance and baptism allow Christ to purify our lives in the blood of the Lamb and we are clean again. What we were, we never have to be again, for God in his mercy has promised that “he who has repented of his sins, the same is forgiven, and I, the Lord, remember them no more.” (D&C 58:42.)
http://www.lds.org/ensign/1977/03/alma-son-of-alma?lang=eng I also love the fact that he said none of the other analogies “falls more short” – which means the other common analogies also fall short. I’d like to ditch all analogies completely to the Atonement and simply teach the principle itself – but I’m happy that an apostle took the time to refute this particularly horrible one.
Give me a 100 more statements putting an end to bad analogies and false doctrine and we would all be better. Will the people listen to their own prophet? My experience…no, they will not. We are a church of Pharisees.
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Quote:We are a church of Pharisees.
No, my friend, we are a church that has a large number of Pharisees and a large number of non-Pharisees (with the Pharisees being the loudest, since they are more convinced they are right).
That’s an important difference, and it’s the same as every other denomination of which I’m aware.
I didn’t need E. Holland to tell me it was wrong. But I’m not sorry he told some other people it was wrong. I’m glad in my ward I’ve never heard of those screwed up analogies. Not even in my stake. Thankfully I have never heard the hole in the board. That is disturbing on so many levels. I have, however, heard the young women president 4 years ago (I was one of the leaders) say “you need to keep yourself clean b/c who wants used goods”. I was so shocked and so ashamed today that I didn’t speak up. I know that a few of the girls were in sexual relationships, I felt the Spirit leave and literally felt their Spirits wither from that comment. I remember it so well b/c when I was in Y/W’s I had the analogy of “used gum” used. I wasn’t sexually active at the time but I did have a boy friend and felt SO guilty about everything. It was so hard to believe in the “Atonement” when the leaders seemed to give an opposite opinion and no one stopped them, and I am sure they learned it from their leaders.. which is why I am so ashamed that I didn’t speak out loudly and powerfully about that lie. I hope to never hear it again but if I do you can bet I will stand up no matter where I am and stop it.
I am glad to have a reference from an Apostle… even though today that means very little to me.. but I know it does in the church. So thank you for sharing Ray.
There is hardly anything more upsetting to me than these types of comments!
opentofreedom wrote:There is hardly anything more upsetting to me than these types of comments!
They hurt a lot of people. I have a daughter that had to turn to the teachings of Dalia Lama to heal after a sexual assault, because she was unable to find LDS theology and teachings within the church to give her what she needed. The church did a lousy job preparing me and church leaders and church members and teachers to deal with such things.
LOUSY. I give the church an F on this particular subject…of course I grew up in the 70s and 80s…the hey-day of churches’ overreaction from the 60’s sexual revolution.
I suppose they have evolved some…and will continue to evolve. My family will just be unfortunate collateral damage as the church crawls through the evolution process. So damn slow…
Such is life.
Quote:Cwald wrote:
I have a daughter that had to turn to the teachings of Dalia Lama to heal after a sexual assault, because she was unable to find LDS theology and teachings within the church to give her what she needed. The church did a lousy job preparing me and church leaders and church members and teachers to deal with such things.
I am so sorry to hear that about your daughter!!! Hugs to her! I am so glad that she was able to find the peace that she needed. Is there any in-particular book/teaching from the Dalia Lama that was most helpful? I would be interested in reading more about that. I agree with you full on F in my book as well!!!!
I have 2 siblings that we sexually assaulted AT the church building and 2 more that we assaulted by church members. I have so much anger recently about these things as they become more clear in my memory and as I see my siblings sufferings from these events. We are all trying hard the best way we know how to heal. I can’t say the church’s teaching has been very helpful to me, I had to find alternative methods as well. This was one of the things that made me the most angry 7 years ago.. meaning… I thought we had the only true teachings in the world. Something must have been wrong with me that I wasn’t healing even though I was giving 110 % of myself in service and living the gospel in a ridiculous effort to be perfect in Christ and heal through those efforts.
I tried to make my siblings be LDS and thought that was the only way they could heal too, but I see that they are MUCH happier than they were in the church now that they are out, but I can’t say they have really healed. They are doing the best they know how. But their example of leaving what made them unhappy opened my mind and eventually led me to outside sources, which led me to other modalities of healing (as traditional therapy also only got me so far).
If I sound as if I am giving too much responsibility to the church for my healing, you would be correct, as that is how I perceived it to be. I am also a child of the 70’s and 80’s and my parents were converts from Catholicism…they grabbed on to this religion with dear life!! I now take full responsibility for my emotional, spiritual and even physical healing. But I have complete compassion for those who don’t and are misled the way I feel that I was… either by parents, church leaders or both.
I have come a LONG way! I have a LONG way to go and know that this is all part of the plan for me and I will never stop evolving and growing.
“The Wisdom of Forgiveness” By the 14th Dalia Lama I know. Sounds a lot like the what perhaps started the lds church down this unfortunate path. “The miracle of forgiveness”.
Irony right.
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Thanks so much. I will look into that.
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