Joined a while back – never posted

I was finally convinced that I should go to the church’s addiction recovery program. It was there that I finally found Jesus. I thought I had found him before (and I did) but this was deeper and more meaningful. These meetings were the first time I could say what I really believed and nobody really judged. The people there wanted me to succeed but they understood my pain. Those meeting were not so much about church stuff as they were about finding the savior for ourselves.

Hi, common twit – (Not sure it’s going to be easy to call you that. 😆 ) I’m glad you’re here. This has been a good place for me.

Glad to have you here!

Yes, it’s fantastic to be in a group that doesn’t judge….in fact, it’s great to be in any relationship that doesn’t judge. I attended the recovery program for a year and it was a nice environment. I went to a couple AA meetings years ago–probably should have gone to more–and it was astounding how good it felt to be honest, open, and feel the love of others. I’m not one that normally needs that kind of support, but when you have something weighing on you and haven’t been honest, it’s a godsend.

Some of the things you are contemplating, as said by mackay11, you’ll have to figure out for yourself. But the support of this site and reading about others’ efforts to find their faith will be helpful. It has been to me.

Alex

I feel like I always say this in response to introductions, but I’ll say it anyway. You and I have lots in common. I’ve been here only a few months, but I, too, am happy I finally found this place. I look forward to your sharing and to sharing with you. Welcome.

CT – welcome to the site, officially (now that you are posting).

Though I’m not as old as you CT, I am a perfectionist and know what you speak of concerning your church experience. I’m not sure why the church has decided to equate more work with more happiness. It seems a little self serving to the organization. Perhaps that helps slackers get moving, but for hard working people pleasers it can be damaging. I’d love to see labels on church statements, like “results will vary”, or “use your common sense” or “not for everybody”.

One thing I’ve noticed in the LDS community is how much addiction is talked about. I wonder if all the religious guilt and shame plays into developing an addiction? I don’t know if you mind expanding, without going into detail of course, on if my observation is accurate? I”m just starting to feel like religion can do almost as much damage as it can do good depending on the individual. I myself have 2 brother in laws with sexual addictions that have nearly ruined their lives. I worry that the LDS Church’s perfectionism teachings are hurting more than they are helping people and I might take my kids out because of some of the problems I’ve seen.

With everything you’ve been through I’m glad to hear you got some help through the process and also found the true pure religion of Jesus Christ, which has nothing to do with work, rules or doctrine and everything to do with love and acceptance. Good luck with your journey. Stay LDS is a great community and I don’t comment too much but I sure enjoy reading everyone’s thoughts.

I have issues with certain doctrine. I would love to leave this all but I cannot resolve just one thing in particular. How can I leave when I know I have had deep spiritual personal revelation? It had not happened for a long time then one evening about a year back I got another one. It was not about anything other than I was strongly impressed that my sins were forgiven. I could not shake that fantastic feeling for a long time.

I am just so confused.

Welcome common twit. Glad you are posting your story with us.

I can appreciate your issues you are working through, and processing them considering your personal revelations.

Are you able to try to separate the issues so they don’t get conflated and confusing and complex? For example, you can see Joseph Smith was called as a prophet AND things he said or did were not God’s will? You can feel God tells you what is good for you AND there are things in the church you just can’t believe are truth?

The paradoxes often allow great opportunities for learning that you can’t solve some problems with the same level of thinking you were at when you discovered the problems.

Thanks for the replies everyone. I hesitate to post because when I go back to read it later, it does not read like I intended it to read. Nonetheless, thanks for letting me share my views.

As for my addictions, which was most just sexual until about seven years ago, I do believe some of it was brought on by church teachings. My porn use probably started back when I was 10 years old. Then a little later, I was molested by a great uncle. So, it was not just church stuff. Later, when I started popping pills, I was just doing it to try to numb my mental anguish. That had nothing to do with religious guilt. That was just me trying to escape.

One of the best things about staylds is no one will hold you to anything you say. You can be steaming with rage one day and be happy as a honey bee the next. We get it.

The other benefit of that is that “writing crystallizes thought.”

Sometimes we think we feel a certain way when it’s jangling around in our head. We can’t fully examine pure thoughts.

Once it’s written (or sometimes spoken) it’s out and more tangible. You can revisit it some time later and decide “yes, that’s really how I feel” or “no, having got it out of my head I realize that’s not entirely representative of what I was feeling.”

We get that here and won’t hold you to anything. So write away (within forum guidelines) and crystallize those thoughts.