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Hello everyone. The past few months have been interesting, to say the least. I went into an inpatient psych where for a week and then continued in a partial hospitalization program each day for about a month. There’s been a heavy focus on cognitive and dialectal behavioral therapy. Now I’m working full-time in a temp job that I really don’t enjoy but is stable and allows me to get some solid ground under my feet. As I’ve mentioned in the past, I have depression, anxiety, and PTSD. I’m on a heavily regulated medication schedule with meds for all 3 of those diagnoses. Fortunately I can tell that the therapy and meds have been helping a lot as I’ve rediscovered a lot of energy, motivation, and determination that had been squashed out of me. I’m changing career fields, goals, and academics plans once again, but I feel excited about it, which is a huge change over the past few years. What I haven’t rediscovered is God and the Savior. I don’t know if They’re real, if They’re there, and if so if They even care about me. I look around at the world and society and all its workings seem so complex. Combine that with the number of people there are in this world, and the amount of suffering, injustices, and corruption/evil there is and I feel so insignificant. I’m reaching out to the StayLDS forum for suggestions on how to find Them, if They’re real and if They care about someone so little and weak as me. What has worked for you when you’ve felt this way? Thank you everyone!
chills31, welcome back. I’m glad your getting help. You asked for help trying to find God. These are some of the things I’ve tried & they work for me.
– Continue to take care of your health. Take your medication, use your counselors, get physical exercise.
– Let God come to you. Do the things that inspire you. It may include walks in the park, service work, art museum, zoo.
– Participate in support groups, if they are available. Continue to use this forum.
I wouldn’t make it more complicated than that for now. Keep is simple.
Add to your list over time. Avoid anything that doesn’t inspire.
Unfortunately, I can’t give you any advice that I can guarantee (or even feel confident) will work. Every person feels and experiences things the way s/he feels and experiences things – and I don’t believe in universal formulas for spiritual experiences. That is true especially when complicating factors like the ones you describe exist. My most important advice would be to continue to find yourself. Once you are “balanced” properly, start to figure out how you feel and experience things. Don’t try to mold yourself to what works for others. If you never find God in a way that gives you strong confidence, try to live the type of life that will allow you to say, if you do meet God eventually, “I did my best to live my life according to the dictates of my own conscience.”
The God in whom I believe would say, “Well done. Love you!”
I wish I could help. But my learning experience has been that love is not an external force or power. It must come from inside you to feel it. It starts by funding self worth and joy in the world. Yes there are many injustices. Always have been, always will be do to a my rid of factors including genetics and getting the chemical release that help people to feel good about things that aren’t helpful to other. Lack of empathy. But the good news is there is so much joy and kindness out three as well. It’s not going to be broadcast on the news. Rarely will it make itself obvious. You have to look for it, consciously and learn how to recognize it when it starts to unfold(it often isn’t obvious). Acts of real kindness really draw attention to itself.
They are there and there is many. I find it is like important friendships, and spouse. It often revolves overlooking the things you can’t stand so you can concentrate on what you do love it like about the world, people.
As for finding gods love it influence, that is a matter of perspective rather then an external force. Viewing things in a different way and feeling overjoyed in the way and contributing it to god.
But everything starts with loving yourself first. Once you can do that sincerely, then you can start to feel joy and love from others. That’s all I got to offer or suggest to you. I’m sorry I can’t offer more. There are places to join, groups of interest or volunteer that you can join that help various causes where you can see and help feel the positive and empathy and love play out. By giving people hope some find that they find it themselves while giving. Could that be a hope in god? For some people yes, most definitely. I wish you well in your quest. Take care.
I think all you really have to do is to want God. You’ll then start looking for Him. And He’s there – always – for everyone. God doesn’t show up just because we start to think about Him or want Him. He’s always been there for each of us. But we certainly start to see Him more. I’m coming to realize that this is why God wants us to be grateful. Not because God needs a “thank-you” from us, but because we need to see how much He helps us. I have a very hard time accepting that God loves me – and I guess most of us do. In the cases where you have trouble loving yourself, it helps to feel God’s love by loving others. It is God that gives us his love when we have trouble loving other people. And even just passing God’s love on to another person, some of it rubs off on us.
The title of your post sort of infers that God is a good distance from you. He isn’t – never was, never will be. I think it would help to instead think of ways to try and see God.
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