Newbie, coming through :-P

Welcome, Bec.

I’m glad you found us and hope we can help in whatever way you need.

Welcome. This is a good and safe place to discuss difficult topics and ask hard questions. I’m not sure we can actually answer any question, but we can help you find what works for you. I, too, hope all goes well with your bishop. You didn’t share what you put in your letter, but either way do be careful what you share with your bishop – I recommend being as vague as possible. I hope you find the peace you seek.

I thought i’d follow up with a “what’s happened so far” I was too sick on Sunday to make it to church, i woke with a migraine and spent the day vomiting, I’ve been under the weather ever since. So i didn’t get a chance to visit with my bishop but he did call me tonight, unfortunately i missed that call as i’d turned my phone off, because i was resting, by the time i checked my phone it was 10pm and i didn’t want to call at that hour, so i’ll try him tomorrow and hopefully we’ll catch each other.

For what it’s worth this was my disassociation letter and my subsequent “I’ve changed my mind letter” I thought i’d share it with you since people have asked. The disassociation letter is a copy of the one my exmo friend gave me to send in.

This letter is my formal resignation from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and it is effective immediately. I hereby withdraw my consent to being treated as a member and I withdraw my consent to being subject to church rules, policies, beliefs and ‘discipline’. As I am no longer a member, I want my name permanently and completely removed from the membership rolls of the church.

I have given this matter considerable thought. I understand what you consider the ‘seriousness’ and the ‘consequences’ of my actions. I am aware that the church handbook says that my resignation “cancels the effects of baptism and confirmation, withdraws the priesthood held by a male member and revokes temple blessings” I also understand that I will be “readmitted to the church by baptism only after a thorough interview”.

Let me make myself clear, I DO NOT BELIVE IN JOSEPH SMITH, THE PROPHETS, OR APOSTLES!!! I DO NOT BELIEVE IN CREATION AND I DO NOT BELIVE IN THE CHURCH, THERE IS NO SALVATION THROUGH LDS INC!!! The church is an abusive cult like religion preying on members and society for its own financial gains.

My resignation should be processed immediately, without any ‘waiting periods’. I am not going to be dissuaded and I am not going to change my mind.

I expect this matter to be handled promptly, with respect and with full confidentiality.

After today, the only contact I want from the church is a single letter of confirmation to letting me know that I am no longer listed as a member of the church.

Any member attempting to visit me at my home will be arrested and prosecuted for stalking harassment and trespassing. NO means NO, LDS members are NOT exempt from obeying my NO RELIGIOUS CALLERS and NO CANVASERS SIGNS!!!

You legally have 72 hours to remove my name from your records as I waive your 30 day holding period policy. Refusing to or ignoring my request for resignation will also be prosecuted under article 18 of the International Covenant on Civil and Political Rights by the Human Rights and Equal Opportunity Commission (HREOC).

Sincerely,

This is my “i’ve changed my mind letter”

I am wondering if it is possible to withdraw my “withdrawal” from membership of the church? I recently wrote in using a letter given to me by a friend to withdraw my membership from the church, however it has come to my attention that the information given to me by my friend about the church may not be accurate. I have begun reading Mormon think for myself and I am finding many inconsistencies and “cherry picked” arguments. For example, my friend and Mormon think claim Joseph was a great story teller and thus the book of Mormon is just another work of fiction like for example Lord of the Rings. But after checking for myself I find the “great stories” they claim, Joseph’s mother talked about, were in fact BOM stories and only started after the first vision. They also claim Joseph copied much of the BOM from the book “View of the Hebrews” but then claim that book was only released 5 years before the BOM. The arguments make no sense, either Joseph began citing BOM stories as a kid after the first vision, as his mother claimed or, he copied the whole BOM from another book. They also claim Joseph could not have been as illiterate as Emma and others stated because both Joseph Snr and Hyrum were part time school teachers, but why then did they not also teach him proper grammar. I am yet to meet a teacher who isn’t a “grammar nazi”

Mormon think and my friend claim that if one problem can be found then surely that brings into question the whole LDS teachings, by that definition I can apply the same theory to Mormon think and my friends’ logic. Currently I am not personally sure what to believe, I was a Jehovah witnesses till the age of 24 and spent 7 years in full time preaching service to them. Losing my faith was one of the most traumatic experiences of my life, I would not wish that loss and subsequent emptiness on anyone, but for the same reason I am hesitant to blindly follow another religious organisation. I have often felt that I was baptised too soon and before I had a proper knowledge and foundation in the LDS faith, but similarly I am not now comfortable to hastily remove my name from your membership records on what now appears to be the illegitimate heresy of a friend. I would like therefore to cancel, my request to withdraw my membership from the church.

Kind Regards

Hopefully it’s enough for the Bishop to at least consider re-instating me

Hi Ray,

Thank you for your bluntness, i appreciate it! I don’t always understand tact.

Apparently that letter is the standard letter on mormon think, It’s also on almost every ex-mo forum site out there. I googled exit letters to compare and all i found was this one. So touch wood, the church is so used to receiving these letters, my bishop will recognize i did not write it. I was informed by my friend these “legal letters” are the only ones the LDS church understands, hence the tone but as for the legitimacy of it, i don’t know anything about that. At the time, i simply didn’t want members calling or visiting me all the time trying to change my mind, i didn’t want to have to explain myself but also i have chronic health issues and random drop ins, regular visits, calls etc..really are too much for me to cope with, even my friends won’t do that. A bishop once told me, in comparison to the Jehovah witnesses process of “shunning” members, that mormons prefer to “love bomb” members into repentance, that is why i was concerned about excessive visitation and phone calls, because a previous bishop had told me that is what happens.

That all aside i do believe my name had already been removed from the members list, because i can no longer log in online. I am yet to receive any letter confirming that but …

I will return my bishops call in the morning and hopefully we can find a time to talk.

I guess it was a little late for the “be careful what you share” advice. I hope your bishop is the understanding and forgiving type and that he did not do as you asked and immediately process the request. I would expect that no matter what you will be under the microscope for some time – and if your request was processed I think there will be a waiting period of at least a year for rebaptism and there will be some requirements before that happens.

That said, we’re still here and we are willing to help you at least as much as you are willing to help yourself.

Just wanted to say hello, beccaboo, and I hope things are working themselves out.

I spoke to my bishop this afternoon, he said i will need to meet with him and the stake president but he will look into reinstatement. As a police officer, he recognized that the disassociation letter was not written by a person but most likely a organisation, so he wasn’t surprised when i told him it was given to me by someone who found it on Mormon think. Because of the nature of the letter and his job, he wasn’t able to perform the usual practice of meeting with me prior to resignation as such he is not sure if the resignation can be rescinded or not. Either way i will still need to meet with him and the stake president, so when he has a time, he will call me back to arrange a meeting.