Sister Wixom’s talk and shame on me.

Thanks, Ann, for sharing this with us. There is a profound lesson in it that goes far beyond the actual example.

I’ve shared one line from conference on my FB wall:

“I was willing to extend courtesy to those without doubts if they would extend courtesy to me.”

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/watch/2015/04?lang=eng&vid=4154712152001&cid=5

I didn’t know you could say things like that in GC. This and another talk about Susan (?). You already knew that Susan was coming back to the church to complete the feel good story but it was the reasons she left and the way she came back that made the story a unique thing to hear in conference.

I’d love to hear a story where Susan doesn’t “need” to come back but the story that was told was a monumental step IMO.

I’ve shared one line from conference on my FB wall:

“I was willing to extend courtesy to those without doubts if they would extend courtesy to me.”

https://www.lds.org/general-conference/watch/2015/04?lang=eng&vid=4154712152001&cid=5

This is an example of one of those things that really stands out to me these days. I was willing to extend courtesy to those without doubts [end the thought right here] if they would extend courtesy to me.

Sometimes we (people in general, including myself, especially myself) add that extra phrase at the end. I believe it’s more powerful to simply say “I’m willing to extend courtesy to those with doubts” without a conditional. They don’t even need to extend courtesy to me, I’ll do my best to extend courtesy to them all the same.

This sort of thing comes up all the time. Another recent example, we support equal rights for gays… but what we really want for you to take away is that we want religious freedom.

I don’t want to make a federal case out of little things like this. Since I’m sensitive to this sort of thing I realize that it must be because I need to do a better job of making statements that express love and inclusion and cutting things off before I get to the conditionals or before I start to shift focus back to me. Maybe if I get good at cutting off conditionals and the me from my interactions the thoughts will disappear as well.

I’m probably breaking my rule in this post [ends the thought right here]

Thanks for the post. I walked out of the room after less than a minute and missed the message. Many speakers have their own tactic to bring your emotions up to their level while they speak and I feel resentful about it too often. I did watch it using the link provided but was a struggle. I’ll get more out of it when I read it.

I think it’s okay to share since there’s no identifying info. To me the take-home in her FB comment was this:

I gave a lesson in RS a month or so ago, and decided to “go there” … and be more honest with my RS sisters with my doubt and faith journey.

We need to be able to go there.

I know I’m preaching to the choir here, Ann, but that’s exactly right. The reason almost all of us are here is because we can’t go “there” with our local leaders or others without facing consequences, ridicule, ostracism, etc. And unfortunately I think we’re a minority group here – that is, there are many more in our situation who for whatever reason don’t come here. I suppose in some way it goes back to “I’m willing to extend….” I could very well have had civil conversations about my doubts with my bishop, SP, or whatever if I thought they were willing, if I thought they would would extend the courtesy of listening and sincerely trying to help without the above consequences, ridicule, etc. Especially in the beginning when my doubts were fewer and far less broad and deep (or deep seeded).

I’ve already touted Sr. Wixom’s talk to my SP and we generally discuss GC talks in our HC meetings (because our assigned topics come from them 🙄 ). I’m pretty sure Sr. Wixom’s won’t become a topic or recommended reference as part of the assigned topics, though. So how do we go about getting this message out? How do we get our leaders to understand that if they would just listen (like Job’s friends, I have used that before) as opposed to the other stuff they generally do?

On edit: After I wrote this I got the agenda for the next meeting – we are to come prepared to discuss our reactions to our recent stake conference and to general conference.

I do it by mentioning the talks whenever appropriate.

Seriously, how many orthodox members are going to argue if I quote or reference a General Conference talk?

how many orthodox members are going to argue if I quote or reference a General Conference talk?

I do the same Ray, I think though that for many of us – and those who have left – little drops of water aren’t fast enough. The information overhaul that has caused the recent flood of crisis is nearly 10 years old and I think many of us think 10 years would have a meatier response. Am I delighted with the abundance of messages that open doors to nuance, grace, Pure gospel and so on absolutely – I just want to be able to see it drench us as a people. We need a tsunami to get the result.