Home Page Forums General Discussion ASked to give a blessing — heart not in it

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  • #209973
    Anonymous
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    My wife went to our geographical ward today to see a friend’s baby blessed. I didn’t go, as I figured I’d be glommed by Ward leaders needing more free labor (just kidding, sort of).

    My wife told me that a woman I used to home teach, who was less active, told her I was the best home teacher she ever had. She is now fully active, and the RS president, and wants me over to give her a blessing.

    We had a very unusual relationship, myself and this woman. I was in the beginning stages of my disaffection at the time, and she was highly experienced and a former RS President many times over. Very mature and spiritual. I was very comfortable with her less activity Although as a home teacher, I was supposed to be the pillar of Mormontudinality, I wasn’t. I empathized with her desire for a break, and also shared some of my own concerns at the time. It was like there was mutual respect for our unorthodox views. Yet we still participated in the HT visits and respected our respective positions on the church.

    Anyway, I stopped seeing all my HT families when we left the Ward about two years ago. The calls for reports from HP assistants stopped (regarding HT numbers) and I haven’t been her home teacher in several years.

    My heart is not really into giving a blessing. I could probably just not respond, but wondered what others think I should do. Some would say I’m not worthy as I don’t pay tithing, don’t wear garments, and go to church only when convenient…perhaps twice a month.

    #301269
    Anonymous
    Guest

    What about her Husband or current HT?

    I would probably do it if one or the other sealed the blessing & I anointed.

    Especially if you liked that family.

    #301270
    Anonymous
    Guest

    SilentDawning wrote:

    I was supposed to be the pillar of Mormontudinality.


    How have I been here a couple years and missed this word? Or is it newly-minted? Either way, :clap:

    Quote:

    I empathized with her desire for a break, and also shared some of my own concerns at the time. It was like there was mutual respect for our unorthodox views. Yet we still participated in the HT visits and respected our respective positions on the church.


    Sounds to me like you could be up-front with her. If you could see your way clear to be involved at all, great. I tend to think that just going to someone’s house, being in their space, hearing their story, and offering what you can = a good thing.

    #301271
    Anonymous
    Guest

    I have been asked a couple times over the past year to participate in blessings. I’m not a believer in blessings but recognize that others do believe and/or find comfort in them. I have participated as requested, once was the anointing part the other the blessing itself. I used generic language (it was not a serious illness), and I see blessings as more like a prayer anyway. In these kinds of blessings I don’t think there is a worthiness issue, there is no bishop involvement and what not. This lady knows your status (at least somewhat) and wants you to do it anyway, so I say go ahead. If someone else is asked to participate as well, you could get away with doing the anointing.

    #301272
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Ann wrote:

    SilentDawning wrote:

    I was supposed to be the pillar of Mormontudinality.


    How have I been here a couple years and missed this word? Or is it newly-minted?

    Newly minted as far as I know..thanks for the recognition. I add the “tudinatlity” suffix to any word I can and sometimes it works :)

    I suppose I could go over and do the blessing. She is now a Ward leader so I wonder if this is part of an activation program. I gave her a blessing years ago when he had a medical problem and apparently, it went well aftewards. That may be the reason she is seeking me out again…

    She is single (divorced) and may nor may not have a home teacher. But philosophically, I’ve never believed in the “your home teacher should give you the blessing”. That to me, is imposing programmed service on situations where it may not be best for the member. We acknowledge the presence of spiritual gifts, and sometimes, members believe they see that gift, and therefore, ask for the blessing from specific people. Sometimes, HT’s don’t come out like they should, or are entirely indifferent — in that case, they don’t make for great blessing-givers in the eyes of certain members. I think it’s good for members to be able to ask for blessings from people they trust spiritually…

    Part of me wonders if it’s part of an activation/reintegration effort for me as the Ward needs people (like many wards). The absolute worst thing anyone can say is “that we need you” as my “free labor” flag goes up. A much better approach is:

    Quote:

    We realize you had a tough time of it in this Ward, and that you think differently about the church than you once did, but we still want you, and your son, and family to feel part of our community — even if it’s entirely on your own terms

    I will probably do it for the reason DJ mentioned — that it can comfort people and increase their happiness…and I do believe members should be able to ask for a blessing from anyone they choose in the WArd, particularly if they have to share something personal.

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