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Spent some time with my wife discussing how she will manage a new calling she received as a leader. It is typically a demanding calling….. As a battered and scarred leader myself (and she is that way too now), we landed on a few realizations.
1. We wasted a lot of time mis-delegating to people who didn’t have the passion or sometimes skill for the initiatives we wanted. No more of that — it only leads to disappointment. If you don’t have someone with the passion or reliability to do that optional thing, then don’t go asking for the first “apparently” able warm body.
2. There are certain things that HAVE to be done in any calling a) Keep the Sunday meetings running b) make sure reports get in on time, and c) respond to the various projects that get handed down from the Bishop and the Stake. I am sure each calling has its list of “Must Do” items, and then a long list of “nice to have, but if they don’t occur, nothing falls apart at the seams”.
3. We decided she would no longer go in and do a save like she used to — doing other people’s jobs after they failed to follow through on commitments. Delegate, but if the task is peripheral, and not essential, don’t knock yourself out to complete it.
It is a far cry from the way we used to do things — full tilt, lots of extras, but we both seemed to feel at peace about it after we discussed it. Who knows, she may even end up being more effective than in the past…
Does this sound too lackadaisical?
SilentDawning wrote:Does this sound too lackadaisical?
No, absolutely not.
It sounds like growth. As we’ve said many times, we are volunteers in an organization of volunteers.
All responsibilities of the organization is not on the leadership alone.
I believe that each person should do what they can to protect themselves from being taken advantage of. Healthy boundary setting is important. I have said often here that when someone asks me to serve in a calling they get ME, even if that isn’t what they think they are getting. When I served on the High Council for the second time, money was tight. Our church building was in the neighboring state – a 40 minute drive each way. The stake was massive, and the HC spoke each month in one of the units, so I drove a lot in that calling. Due to the costs associated with driving for my calling and simply to attend church, we attended church each Sunday and youth activities most Wednesdays – but we missed more than a few Wednesdays when things were particularly tight financially. It was what we could do without hurting the family in a real way, so it what we did. Period.
Not running faster than we are able is a doctrinal, scriptural principle – as is being agents unto ourselves.
Self-acceptance is important.
Thanks for the posts. I recently switched callings and am way out of my comfort zone. Feeling like I’m not doing all I can etc. (which can be a good thing as a little motivation is usually what I need). Thanks for the advice even as it wasn’t directed to me!
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