Sambee and porn

Why? What exactly are the differences between porn and masturbation that make porn an automatic addiction that don’t apply equally as well to masturbation or reading romance novels for that matter?

Romance novels are not a good example. We had someone in ARP who claimed to be addicted to them. Both lead to unrealistic expectations… and in her case she spent huge amounts of time buried in them.

The difference is time and money. Some people spend a lot of money on it. A lot. There is also an obsessive aspect to it, and it leads you into more and more unsavory things. In the old days people could have big stands of it… now they just fill up their computer memory with hundreds of images. Thousands… and in some cases tens or hundreds of thousands.

Cute topless pics are one thing but it can drag way down to implied incest (usually got round by saying “stepdaughter”, “stepmother”), models who look like children/are dressed up that way and worse. I’ve seen horrific stuff – I’m not going to describe it in detail. I felt physically sick the last time I saw something online – I didn’t go look for it specifically, but I ended up seeing a fist up someone’s rear. It is one of the worst things I’ve seen. I don’t know how anyone finds it erotic.

It never starts off with this.

A guy that goes to the same bar as me… a really nice guy otherwise, confided in me he watches women with animals occasionally. I asked him why… he says he just thinks the women are so dirty it turns him on. I seriously doubt he started off on this fare. Porn dragged him down to this level. Masturbation on its own really wouldn’t really take you there on its own.

I remember reading the story of a porn reviewer. He commented on how quickly he bored of “ordinary” material… and within a short time was only turned on by more and more degrading material.

Also, what exactly is the difference between a genuine addiction and something that people just happen to naturally like?

For starters, I’d say, try and give it up for a month, see how it goes…

why don’t we ever hear about how everyone supposedly needs to be cured of their sugar “addiction” to the point of expecting complete abstinence for everyone the way we repeatedly hear about porn in the Church?

We do. It’s currently a big political issue in my neck of the woods. We do need tiny portions of it to survive though.

I suppose the difference is that sugar addiction – while it has major physical tolls – doesn’t do things to social interaction, and it’s hard to spendlarge sums of money on.

questionable to begin with in the case of porn/nudity whereas it makes more sense in the case of smoking, drugs, etc.

My therapist – who is not a member – tells me that wide availability of porn is causing big social problems. I asked her a bit about this. She gets to see many young women in her work, from children to college age and beyond who are very hurt due to the consequences of it. They are being driven to body image problems not just by stick thin models, but their boyfriends’ porn viewing. Also porn is leading to earlier sexualisation, rougher intercourse (not all women like it), lack of foreplay, lack of affection, and the males are pressurizing them into doing things they have watched that they don’t want to.

There are other factors – many girls/women have different types of nipple, hair downstairs, one breast smaller than the other etc etc. They are getting bullied for this by males who’ve watched porn where the models tend to fit into a narrow range of body types. Men and women have also come to the conclusion that being photographed is okay, but then there’s the revenge thing where it gets shared. Teenagers tend to have short relationships.

The problem with this is that for many of these supposed porn “addicts” their lives are not unmanageable at all; they basically continue to go about their business more or less the same way they would if they never looked at porn/nudity

This is not true. I was first exposed to pornography when I was only seven. I can’t go back on it. It should have never happened. It altered how I looked at women. It gave me a completely distorted view of intimacy almost a decade before I even started dating properly.

Sexual abuse had occurred between pupils at my elementary school as well and I put the blame for that behind porn for that too.

Two things have warped my sexuality. Spending periods of childhood in a single sex school, without any female siblings, and the great P.

This is all without discussing the industry which is bad on many levels.