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I have a question — we know that our RS has a program where if someone is sick, the RS takes meals over to the family who is experiencing the sickness or other trial. It’s a way of showing you care. But if everyone (or most people) get this kind of service, does this really build community? To me, programmed service takes the life out of love and service. It makes it hard to determine if the person is doing it in order to comply with the program, or if they truly care about the person they are serving.
Now, CUSTOMIZED service, that is not programmed, and that meets the needs of the member in need, to me is much more effective in building a caring community.
Do you think programmed service is effective in building community? If not, how DO you go about creating a thriving, caring community in a church or Ward?
I think it can. Using your example, our local Methodist congregation does something very similar. When someone is sick, has a death in the family,etc., they are very very good at bringing around meals to those “in need.” They’re far more efficient than we are about it actually, even using a Google calendar so people can pick when they want to bring something and everyone can see what everyone else brought. An email announcement goes out and within a few hours it’s all taken care of – no calling or cajoling people. I have seen this work several times in the community, and I’ve even participated. I doubt whether all Methodist congregations are set up this same way, but it works for them and our little town. That said, I see your point – personalized/individualized/customized service certainly has its benefits. I think that happens in the Methodist community as well but it’s more quiet. I also think that kind of service is what ministering is about. The warning from the Seventy who did ministering training with us comes to mind. He warned us not to try to programmize ministering.
Having meals brought over makes me feel cared for and part of the ward community. I appreciate that my family has home and visiting teachers that I can reach out to. I do not need monthly visits, but I do know who they are and I am assertive enough to contact them when there is a need.
The better solution is to have a real friend. Sometimes I think how much different our church experience would be if my wife just had one good friend in the ward. In the mean time however, having some programmed service from the ward “family” can be a lifeline.
What would an example of customized service be? SilentDawning wrote:
I have a question — we know that our RS has a program where if someone is sick, the RS takes meals over to the family who is experiencing the sickness or other trial. It’s a way of showing you care.
Yup. Unless your family has special dietary needs, or doesn’t need meals (or both).
SilentDawning wrote:
But if everyone (or most people) get this kind of service, does this really build community? To me, programmed service takes the life out of love and service. It makes it hard to determine if the person is doing it in order to comply with the program, or if they truly care about the person they are serving.Now, CUSTOMIZED service, that is not programmed, and that meets the needs of the member in need, to me is much more effective in building a caring community.
After my baby was born, the sisters came to visit us – some of them brought food, but mostly they came for us. They came to listen to my crazy delivery story, to sit with me while I was recovering/resting. My visiting teacher volunteered to watch my oldest – day or night (she specifically said we could drop off my eldest at 3 AM while on the way to the hospital), because she knew that we had no family in the area.
SilentDawning wrote:
Do you think programmed service is effective in building community? If not, how DO you go about creating a thriving, caring community in a church or Ward?
i think that meals are an institutional way to start – more of an introduction to the idea that one can do specific actions to serve others. Sort of the training wheels for ministering to others. We use food all the time to introduce ourselves in our communities, and to be an “ice breaker” to start relationships.
I don’t think that programmed service is effective. I guess you create a caring community by listening, not judging, and being apart of the person’s life.
Yes, sometimes. No, sometimes.
Hard to say ahead of time.
Old Timer wrote:
Yes, sometimes.No, sometimes.
Hard to say ahead of time.
Time after time!
😆 I think they do. Anything can become check listed. Does routine taking of the Sacrament or Eucharist build community?
Community is built when your heart cares. Whether it’s an assigned deal or something you do spontaneously, like helping a neighbor build a fence or haul off a chopped down tree.
I appreciate that we have systems of information for either option in our religious community. I try to make every effort to sign up for those options. I have been the giver and recipient and on both ends it helps me.
Signing up for meals is not programmed. No one corners you and says, “I notice you never sign up?” It’s a choice.
Customized service often comes after you get to know someone or something. But the room for building community is still a maybe. I have watched people in my wards and Stake attend customized service and one of the few complainers complaints was that “he didn’t get time to connect with his ward members.” In my mind that wasn’t the intent. The intent was for us to give large scale, meaningful service to people outside the standard LDS circle.
I bit my tongue through his entire diatribe, because I wanted to say “If you want to get to know people in your ward, go the monthly ward party.”
I believe we build community when we serve. Like life some days are good. Other’s not so much.
I believe it genuinely can. Especially with those members who are shy, but require service. The program is the spark… we should just hope it catches.
There’s the idea that we serve the people we love. I believe that we also grow to love the people we serve. I agree in that I feel that service that is performed because someone feels compelled to do something isn’t as effective in building communities as volunteered service.
There’s the question of whether any service would take place at all if not for assignments and social pressure. I think it would but the service would be just the bare-bones things that people found meaningful. So much of church feels like keeping busy for the sake of being busy, I don’t know whether that kind of activity builds communities.
The idea that non-purely-motivated service is bad comes from a misinterpretation of the Biblical verse that says paying alms (helping others) for public recognition does not bring a reward in heaven. What people fail to recognize is that those who do so are said to “have their reward (already)” – which means they won’t receive another reward. Nowhere does it say what they do is bad or that they shouldn’t do it. Programmed service is service. It is good or bad depending on the service, not the fact that it is programmed. Personally-motivated, non-programmed service can be bad, as well – as anyone knows who has been harassed by a loved one about something that loved one thinks is important service but really is just annoying, obnoxious, or even harmful. Motivation and individual initiative can be important for personal growth and authenticity, but, all by itself, it doesn’t translate automatically into better service.
IMHO, any gathering can build community, no matter what you are doing. When I think of “Programmed Service” I think of cleaning the chapel, raking the church leaves, or home teaching. Do any of these build community more than the ward Christmas Party? More than Trunk or Treat? More than the three hour Church block? My problem with most “Programmed Service” in the Church, is it feels like it is serving LDS Corp, rather than serving the members. There are a few exceptions. I believe the Relief Society assigning members to bring meals to those in need is a wonderful program which builds community. If a sister can’t participate, she isn’t forced. And even better, it feels like a community contract; each sister knows that they will be taken care of if the need arises. “Fast Offerings” is also viewed in a similar light by most members, and is also a form of “Programmed Service”, since we all have to work/give up food to contribute. But unlike the Relief Society program, F.O. is too much like dealing with a corrupt insurance company. The Church is often much more worried about their own money, than the members. Even if you contribute, there is no guarantee you’ll be helped.
I don’t think many members participate in “Programmed Service” for the praise. I think most do it because they’d feel too guilty about saying no.
mom3 wrote:
I think they do.Anything can become check listed. Does routine taking of the Sacrament or Eucharist build community?
Community is built when your heart cares. Whether it’s an assigned deal or something you do spontaneously, like helping a neighbor build a fence or haul off a chopped down tree. …
I believe we build community when we serve. Like life some days are good. Other’s not so much.
I agree with mom3 and others…I think it is better than nothing, and sometimes needed to organize a group of people rather than just “hoping” someone does the right thing.It is the lesser law, which helps the weak until they become strong enough to do it without checklists. I am pretty weak. I often need to know what service opportunities are available and what I have the time and ability to do. If no one else can do it…I might need to do it anyway, whether I see the need or not.
It is part of being in the community.
The more “heart” the community has, as mom3 put it…the more effective. But any service is better than no service.
Church has to be more than sermons and lessons in church (especially when our sermons and lesson are so boring).
Programmed service is good for those members who are not outgoing, or perhaps even not well liked. I’ve done such service and it is good because I have gotten to know such people.
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