What would you say to this?

What would you say to someone who doesn’t see any point in doing their genealogy because their family line ends with them?

That it’s okay and there’s not even a need to qualify it.

Different people have different interests, different passions, and different needs. I see the following play out at church:

When it’s the week to have a lesson on genealogy they get the person in the ward that’s the most enthusiastic about genealogy to give the lesson.

When it’s the week to have a lesson on missionary work they get the person in the ward that’s the most enthusiastic about missionary work to give the lesson.

When it’s the week to have a lesson on ministering visits they get the person in the ward that’s the most enthusiastic about ministering visits to give the lesson.

etc.

At church we tend to think of programs as requirements as opposed to offerings that are available to explore what interests us. It’s not, “Here’s something you can do if you’re interested,” it’s, “Here’s what you should be doing, here’s your goal for participation, and we’ll be around to measure your results.”

As mentioned, the person giving the lessons is often the most enthusiastic person in the ward about that program, it’s their favorite thing. Sometimes I think this gives others the impression that the programs should be everyone’s favorite thing and that everyone should be as enthusiastic about the programs as the person with the most enthusiasm in the ward has for the programs.

I find taking the mindset of viewing the programs as something to do if it sparks your interest to be much more relaxing.

I guess the first question is context – what is the relationship you have to the person and to connecting them with family history?

If it is a casual connection – I would say nothing. If a friend of mine isn’t interested in something that I am interested in, then it is mentioned casually while finding common ground.

When I taught R.S. in about Family History – I made the point of saying that family history was not just about parents/children – it was about connections between generations. So serving refugees = family history, as did community work, temple work, indexing/transcription (for a variety of sources from billionsofgraves to the local historical society to the actual LDS website) and a variety of non-traditional fields.

I guess that I would expand the conversation to “what do you want to pass onto the next generation(s)?”.

NOTE: This expansion of lesson scope was in part because in studying mental health and trauma, it became clear to me that there were likely abusive relationships, severed family connections, and boundaries set between family members that was a nest of hornets I didn’t want to trigger.

For me this seems like an existential question. What does my life mean if I have no descendants to point to for meaning? Who will remember me? Who will inherit my stuff? I think the answers could be different for everyone. Some may find comfort in telling their story or discovering the story of their ancestors. Others might find meaning in community service. Maybe you find meaning by building something that will outlive you. Maybe you find meaning in becoming connected to others.

Some who believe in eternal life might not feel this to be an issue at all (since they will always live on).

I think you pretty much hit the nail on the head. I likely only have two descendants to carry on my line, out of my four kids only one looks like they’ll ever had children, they have one son and one daughter. Out of my first cousins on that line, one had two sons who apparently will never have children, one was adopted into the family, and one female I’m not close to I think has a child or two, but they’re somewhat detached from the family.

So my line should carry on, but much less than someone might expect once you look at the descendants of my grandparents. My friend doesn’t have that, she has one daughter who will apparently never have a baby. Her daughter is now in her late 20s and is about to be married. She has two step-kids and one they both just adopted. Her husband-to-be has no interest in another baby at this stage. My friend is thrilled to have an adopted grandchild, she never even expected that much, but she now knows there will be no one to carry on her line.

“There is a time and a season for everything under the sun. Nobody can do everything all the time. Nobody. It’s fine if this isn’t your time or season for genealogy – and if it never is.”

I’ve only been mildly interested in genealogy but I appreciate knowing a little bit about where I came from. I currently have only two grandchildren and while I expect to have a couple more I doubt I’ll ever be taking one of those multi generational photos filled with people. But still to be able to know where you came from can be compelling but most of these people are just names to me. Like Cadence said, most of us will pass away unnoticed. But while I’m here I hope I can illuminate my tiny corner of existence as much as possible.

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