Abandoned

[Anonymous]

I did two posts this week, both inspired by the Maxwell Institute’s podcast with Elizabeth Drescher about the “Nones.” There are a lot of things that may speak to this group. This one describes the three types of exit paths from religion that Elizabeth Drescher identified in her interviews with those who claimed no religious affiliation:

http://www.wheatandtares.org/21341/becoming-nones-3-exit-ramps/

A quote from the original podcast:

Quote:

Hodges: So here is a quote from Ethan from the book. He said, “Religion dictated so much of my life as a child, not just what we believed but really who we were against the rest of the world.” He’s describing an oppositional position vis-à-vis the world and he said, “We were Mormons first. We’re from five generations of Mormons but I was always asking questions. Why do we do it this way? Why can’t I drink a Coke? And my mom or dad would say, ‘Well, you just have to have faith.’ So I knew enough to shut up and you know as a kid I didn’t really disagree exactly, I just wanted to know why. And I was always like that so I asked questions about everything. But ask too much about the church though, that seemed to be the worst sin you could do.”

So that sort of shut-down conversation later manifested itself as anger in him when he ended up disaffiliating.

This one was more of a personal reflection on the things we leave behind as well as feeling abandoned. I have some sympathy for E. Holland’s angry rant about people who bail on the church, not because I think he’s right, but because I understand the frustration when we feel something we’ve worked hard at, poured ourselves into, is abandoned.

https://bycommonconsent.com/2016/06/21/abandoned/

From this post:

Quote:

From history we know that there are many reasons people abandon places.

Something tragic happens. A murder. A war. A natural disaster. The Great Depression. A nuclear disaster. Genocide.

Resources become scarce. The source of water dries up. There is a drought or famine. Transportation routes and methods change. A mine runs out of its mineral. A cash crop loses popularity. Another city siphons off resources, making this former location untenable or isolating it. [2]

Upkeep is too expensive. This is often the case with abandoned castles. The wealth that was poured into the building lasts for a while, but eventually, nobility is left with its titles and little else. “New money” comes in the form of trade while aristocracy begins to decay, sometimes clinging to its irrelevant past, its glory days.

What happens to an abandoned place is invariably the same. Nature creeps in and reclaims it. Sometimes this new elegiac beauty surpasses the original elegance. Decay is its own form of grandeur.

To draw a Mormon parallel to the reasons people abandon buildings, houses or communities, I see all of these reasons at play in various ways:

1 – People leave when they feel they’ve been abused or given disastrous advice.

2 – People leave through neglect or lack of support.

3 – People leave when the cost of staying feels too high.

[Anonymous]

I left because of #1 (not really left, but became disengaged). #2 was part of my #1 experience. That led to #3 materializing. It’s not worth the sacrifice after you become disenthralled.

[Anonymous]

It really is an excellent post, HG. Love it.

It does have lots of application for our discussions, I think.

The one I hear most often, by those who stay and are considered faithful, and those who leave, is how boring it is. That’s an interesting one for me. Because most leaders just kind of say “Well, it is what you bring to the meeting with you.” or they just say we have to endure and deal with it. No particular reason. We just need to be there.

The “Why” we need to be there even if it is boring is what I constantly think about.

I bet there are some really really good teachers around the stake, that are stuck in leadership or stake callings and not in the Sunday School classes. If they wanted to fix the “boring”…they could, if they weren’t so rigid with callings.

It would be something I would love to see improved, instead of just sending the message religion is about enduring the pain with a happy attitude.

[Author]

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