I feel how lenient a leader is, is more of a personal thing than what the handbook says. I once had a Stake President that was a very harsh man. I repented of serious sins, and did my best to tell him everything. A few years pass, I am living my life, and am feeling guilty about an event in college that I had forgotten to tell the SP about. I tell my then-current leader about the event, which happened before all of my other sins that I had repented of in the past with the SP. I had not done anything after that repentance to question my temple recommend status. My then-current leader took away my temple recommend for 6 months, but I was still able to take the sacrament.
What did this teach me? Don’t confess sins of the past that aren’t up to a certain level. I figure if I am not committing adultery or murdering people, I probably don’t need to tell some guy that could be having a power trip, or is looking to exercise his delegated power in a way that would hurt the situation more than help.