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I was recently pondering the things I like and dislike about being LDS. I like sacrament meetings where we sing hymns and listen to speakers (yes, some are boring but even the boring ones can bring on a sense of peace), I like Sunday School where we have an opportunity to discuss and express our views on scriptural concepts (okay so there’s a few humdingers that people bring up but my ward doesn’t do that too much), I like the idea of brotherhood and sisterhood in the gospel. I even like the temple ceremony and the move into the celestial room. I do NOT like ward parties, I do NOT like going hometeaching, I do NOT like being hometaught, I do NOT like Elders’ service projects (I’ve shingled way too many roofs in my lifetime given that I don’t know which end of a hammer is up), I do NOT like Stake Conference or any kind of stake activity. I do NOT like singing in the choir (I do it because I admire and like the choir director), I DID not like missionary work and I still DON’T like missionary work. I do NOT like having leadership responsibilities in the Church. I do NOT like it when fellow (male) ward members come up to me, slap me on the back and put their hands on my shoulder before saying what they need to say (talk about invasion of personal space).
The things I like are those that are personal and inward. The things I don’t like are the opposite. I am a very private, reserved person who does not like crowds or group activities. I’m introverted (maybe it’s a clinical problem on my part). However, I feel like the culture of the LDS Church encourages you to be extraverted, outgoing, social and interactive. Maybe my issues come down to a personality conflict between what I am and what the Church needs its members to be. Does anyone else feel like their basic personality traits conflict with what the Church requires? (Doesn’t have to be about the introversion/extraversion dichotomy).
Quote:Does anyone else feel like their basic personality traits conflict with what the Church requires?
Mine might conflict with what many leaders want (what they request / demand), but they don’t conflict with what the Church “requires” – and that’s an important distinction to me.
I think the Church requires whatever it can get – and I don’t mean that as a negative. As SilentDawning often says, pretty much any organization will take and be grateful for as much as its participants will give – and will push for as much as can be given. That has been true of every single job I’ve ever had in my life – and it’t not a bad thing, in and of itself. I actually would say that employers generally are FAR more adamant about this than the LDS Church is, since I can be fired from a job simply for not doing what I’m required to do to keep that job, while I’m not going to be excommunicated or even disciplined in any way simply for not doing something. I can coast or even refuse to listen at all in the Church, since very few things really are “required” once you are baptized.
Having said that, I do think it can be much harder on introverts in the LDS Church (and those who struggle with depression and unrealistic expectations) – especially since we are expected to “serve” others as a central part of our societal structure and doctrinal foundation.
Gerald, I agree with most of the things you listed. I consider myself a basic introvert. But, we shouldn’t limit our lives to lists that define: this is what I like. Or, this is what I don’t like.
Every once in awhile I get a surprise. For example, I thought that I didn’t like do Home Teaching or to be Home taught.
Then I got a new HT that was very interesting & doesn’t stick to the “script”. Our discussions can be very unpredictable.
I started doing HT & was assign to an older gentleman with a very interesting life.
The Church does have a tendancy to be extraverted (talking) about missionary work. It doesn’t always do a good job of listening.
In the years I’ve been inactive, I’ve found many new friends that I consider fascinating. They are fascinating because they have
very interesting lives outside of my previous network (lds). Overall, I don’t think the Church encourages us to listen or understand
other view points.
Mike from Milton.
Short answer: Yes. Myers-Briggsyes. If I had the choice to belong to an internet Ward and never have to meet face to face….I would do it in a heart beat.
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cwald wrote:If I had the choice to belong to an internet Ward and never have to meet face to face….I would do it in a heart beat.
and miss the chance to sip ale on your porch?
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