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Exactly, Heber. Bottom line for me:
I won’t excuse Bill for doing what I criticize others for doing.
I probably am at the end of my participation in this conversation. Thank you, everyone, for keeping it in line with the spirit of this site we try to cultivate.
I was thinking of how I would handle the situation if I were Bill. As an analytical person, I personally would want some kind of a record of what happened so I could go back over and it understand what happened better. I’d probably refuse to sign it, and then move on. This might prompt them to search me and remove the device. If that was a likelihood they would search me if I didn’t sign, I’d have my wife spouse in attendance with a wire so I could record it for me, and not have to sign anything.
That way I could be honest and get the recording at the same time.
I do think the church can’t have its cake and eat it too — follow excommunication policy but not let the person tell their story afterwards. I consider it my right to tell my story if I want to, and its part of getting over the trauma of such circumstances.
I do sympathize with Bill. I know how traumatic it was for me when I crossed the line from TBM to unorthodox. This was after Mormonism defined so much of my life — my finances, who I married, how I presented myself to the world, my volunteer activities and preparation therefor (took 4 years), how I spent most of my disposable time….he needs healing from this too. He says publicly that everyone is fine, but he must be hurting after disciplinary council like this. Being able to remember and tell his story is his right.
Maybe he shouldn’t have signed the document, but I don’t consider that the focal point of his experience. We’ve dedicated an awful lot of keystrokes to discussing it for sure.
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