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Kipper, you are absolutely right. You will notice from time to time, there are some Leaders (& followers) that know how to say “NO”. As I came back to the “active” status, I told specific people that there are certain church jobs I’m not confortable with. There are others
Iam. I’ve also noticed that as you say yes to a job that seems comfortable & within the limits I’ve set for myself, slowly they begin to ask (&
expect more). It is a balancing act sometimes. There is nothing wrong in saying
Quote:let me think about it before I can accept
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Life in the LDS church can be a balancing act. There are times you have to say NO to save your sanity, your marriage, etc.
Maybe because I’m at the ripe old age, I don’t hesitate to say No from time to time or set limits for my time.
Elder Wirthlin mentioned that one group that stops attending church are the “tired” – and he put the responsibility to fix that on those who are making them tired. Elder Packer said that the Church is established to serve families, not families established to staff the Church.
Yes, absolutely it’s OK to set limits. If we don’t do that, unfortunately, the 80/20 rule will apply by default – especially since so many people who end up in leadership roles are do-it-all-ers and can’t accept letting some things get left undone.
That’s true of nearly ALL organizations, frankly — If you show you are willing to put in overtime on a salary, guess what happens? In fact, many salaried positions are assumed to include what normally would be considered overtime – “whatever it takes to do the job”.
As I was driving to the desert with my son last week to do some off road riding for a few days we got to talking about church responsibilities. He turned 18 last April and is now being asked by everyone at every corner why he doesn’t go on his mission right away. He said to me “…why do people in the church think everybody should be the same?” It was a longer conversation than that and he knows there is no real pressure from the church for him to stop school before semester end but the point is I had the same question for a long time. We are not all the same when it comes to our goals, desires, what drives us, what satisfies us and how we should use our time. I accepted my current calling because the YM and Scouting organization in our ward was barely functioning so now I am in the 80% of the 80/20 rule. The cost to my personal goals (A.S. degree) and family time (giving up our traditional get-aways last spring, summer and fall) have left a scar that will not heal itself. If everything you do is at the expense of something else then there is too much to do in this organization for most to live up to. Kipper wrote:As I was driving to the desert with my son last week to do some off road riding for a few days we got to talking about church responsibilities. He turned 18 last April and is now being asked by everyone at every corner why he doesn’t go on his mission right away. He said to me “…why do people in the church think everybody should be the same?” It was a longer conversation than that and he knows there is no real pressure from the church for him to stop school before semester end but the point is I had the same question for a long time. We are not all the same when it comes to our goals, desires, what drives us, what satisfies us and how we should use our time. I accepted my current calling because the YM and Scouting organization in our ward was barely functioning so now I am in the 80% of the 80/20 rule. The cost to my personal goals (A.S. degree) and family time (giving up our traditional get-aways last spring, summer and fall) have left a scar that will not heal itself. If everything you do is at the expense of something else then there is too much to do in this organization for most to live up to.
Perhaps you should listen to your prophets and make some changes: And perhaps you need to let your local leaders know what their prophets have been saying on this matter as well.
Quote:“…there are so many “shoulds” and “should nots” that merely keeping track of them can be a challenge. Sometimes, well-meaning amplifications of divine principles—many coming from uninspired sources—complicate matters further, diluting the purity of divine truth with man-made addenda. One person’s good idea—something that may work for him or her—takes root and becomes an expectation. And gradually, eternal principles can get lost within the labyrinth of “good ideas.
“This was one of the Savior’s criticisms of the religious “experts” of His day, whom He chastised for attending to the hundreds of minor details of the law while neglecting the weightier matters.
“My dear brothers and sisters, we would do well to slow down a little, proceed at the optimum speed for our circumstances, focus on the significant, lift up our eyes, and truly see the things that matter most. Let us be mindful of the foundational precepts our Heavenly Father has given to His children that will establish the basis of a rich and fruitful mortal life with promises of eternal happiness.“May I suggest that you reduce the rush and take a little extra time to get to know yourself better. Walk in nature, watch a sunrise, enjoy God’s creations, ponder the truths of the restored gospel, and find out what they mean for you personally.”
– Pres. Uchtdorf cwald wrote:Perhaps you should listen to your prophets and make some changes: And perhaps you need to let your local leaders know what their prophets have been saying on this matter as well.
Quote:“…there are so many “shoulds” and “should nots” that merely keeping track of them can be a challenge. Sometimes, well-meaning amplifications of divine principles—many coming from uninspired sources—complicate matters further, diluting the purity of divine truth with man-made addenda. One person’s good idea—something that may work for him or her—takes root and becomes an expectation. And gradually, eternal principles can get lost within the labyrinth of “good ideas.
“This was one of the Savior’s criticisms of the religious “experts” of His day, whom He chastised for attending to the hundreds of minor details of the law while neglecting the weightier matters.
“My dear brothers and sisters, we would do well to slow down a little, proceed at the optimum speed for our circumstances, focus on the significant, lift up our eyes, and truly see the things that matter most. Let us be mindful of the foundational precepts our Heavenly Father has given to His children that will establish the basis of a rich and fruitful mortal life with promises of eternal happiness.“May I suggest that you reduce the rush and take a little extra time to get to know yourself better. Walk in nature, watch a sunrise, enjoy God’s creations, ponder the truths of the restored gospel, and find out what they mean for you personally.”
– Pres. Uchtdorf That is a good reply to a post I felt I may have worded little strong. Thank you. Some of this definitely applies.
Quote:If everything you do is at the expense of something else then there is too much to do in this organization for most to live up to.
Amen – so be an “agent unto yourself”.
Easier said than done, I know, but I’ve been doing it for decades and still have served in most callings in the Church – except the ones I am grateful to have escaped (Bishop, Elders’ Quorum President and Relief Society President).
Ray – You would make an outstanding Relief Society President. :clap:
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