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One of my favorite General Authorities of all time was Chieko Okazaki, a counselor in the General Relief Society Presidency from 1990-1997. She was an amazing woman and an astounding speaker. Sister Okazaki passed away last week, and there have been numerous posts in honor of her around the Bloggernacle. I am not going to try to add anything new, but, instead, I am going to plagiarize from those posts – since my favorite quotes from Sister Okazaki tend to the same as those that touched others profoundly. The following are some of the things she said that I believe are of particular power for this forum:
Quote:“Only you know your circumstances, your energy level, the needs of your children, and the emotional demands of your other obligations. Be wise during intensive seasons of your life. Cherish your agency, and don’t give it away casually. Don’t compare yourself to others — nearly always this will make you despondent.
Don’t accept somebody else’s interpretation of how you should be spending your time.Make the best decision you can and then evaluate it to see how it works.” “Be spiritually independent enough that your relationship with the Savior doesn’t depend on your circumstances or what other people say and do. Have the spiritual independence to be a Mormon – the best Mormon you can – in your own way.
Not the bishop’s way. Not the Relief Society president’s way. Your way”.(“Lighten Up!” [an incredible book!!])
Quote:Now, I ask this question of all of us and lay this burden upon us: What circumstances are at work right now in our wards, silently separating one sister here and another sister there from the sisterhood of the Relief Society, marginalizing them, making them invisible? And what can we do about it? . . . For example, LDS women are participating in the labor force in ever-increasing numbers. These women need Relief Society. They need the strength of sisterhood. They need to be understood. They need support with their families.
They don’t need to be told that they’re selfish or unrighteous because they’re working. They need to be told they are loved.(“Disciples”, “Knit Together in Love,” Chapter 6)
Quote:All of us women have an image of the ideal family—a marriage in the temple to an active priesthood holder, and children who are obedient and faithful. But President Ezra Taft Benson has pointed out that only 14 percent of American households in 1980 match the traditional image of a family—working husband, full-time mother with children still in the home. Reliable statistics indicate that only one out of five LDS families in the United States have a husband and wife married in the temple with children in their home.
As Elder M. Russell Ballard has already reminded us, there is great diversity in LDS homes. But all of these homes can be righteous homes where individuals love each other, love the Lord, and strengthen each other.
Let me give you an example. Here are two quilts. Both are handmade, beautiful, and delightful to snuggle down in or wrap around a grandchild. Now look at this quilt. It’s a Hawaiian quilt with a strong, predictable pattern. We can look at half of the quilt and predict what the other half looks like. Sometimes our lives seem patterned, predictable in happy ways, in order.
Now look at this second quilt. This style is called a crazy quilt. Some pieces are the same color, but no two pieces are the same size. They’re odd shapes. They come together at odd angles. This is an unpredictable quilt. Sometimes our lives are unpredictable, unpatterned, not neat or well-ordered.
Well, there’s not one right way to be a quilt as long as the pieces are stitched together firmly. Both of these quilts will keep us warm and cozy. Both are beautiful and made with love. There’s not just one right way to be a Mormon woman, either, as long as we are firmly grounded in faith in the Savior, make and keep covenants, live the commandments, and work together in charity.(General Conference, 1992, “Strength in the Savior”)
Quote:(Jesus is) not waiting for us to be perfect. Perfect people don’t need a Savior. He came to save his people in their imperfections. He is the Lord of the living, and the living make mistakes. He’s not embarrassed by us, angry at us, or shocked.
He wants us in our brokenness, in our unhappiness, in our guilt and our grief.(BYU Women’s Conference)
One of the commenters in one of the tribute threads summed up why Sister Okazaki was able to speak so powerfully and touch so many hearts – especially those of women. She said, simply:
Quote:I think it is because she was a prophet.
We need more people like her in Church leadership! Thanks for sharing. I honestly had never heard her name before. Deserves to be better known, I’ve never heard of her. Outstanding quotes. I’m sending these to my daughter to read. Thank you for highlighting her, Ray. In a talk I gave last Father’s Day I quoted from Sister Okazaki, here is what I said: Roy wrote:Sister Okazaki, the first non-Caucasian member of a church general board and also the first in a general presidency comes to us with a Buddhist heritage. She has such a gift for seeing beauty in the harmony. She had this to say, “Diversity is a strength. I attend a lot of meetings where I’m the only woman. And I attend many, many meetings where I’m the only Oriental woman. Have you ever had the feeling that you’re the odd one, the different one? Maybe even too odd or different for this church? The truth is that you’re not odd—you’re special. When white light falls on a wall, it makes a white wall. But when it passes through a prism, that same light makes a rainbow on the wall…[Like God during creation, I’d like to say]”Let there be light.” All kinds of light! Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and violet light. We need our differences.” (Lighten up! 17)
In Hawaii, I was surrounded from babyhood by differences- in language, in physical appearance, in dress, in economic level, in religion, in traditional men’s and women’s roles, in education, in race, in life-styles, and in customs. I observed differences, but I did not learn to label them as “good” or “bad”… Being different, I internalized, is all right. Heavenly Father wants differences. He does not make two identical blossoms or two snowflakes that are the same” (ibid 122-3)
Thank you, Sister Okazaki for not giving up and thinking that you were too different for the Lord’s church. Thank you for being you and for choosing to be you while in our midst. May you continue to shine.
I am confident that she will shine on with her own special tint of color in the heavens, where she will be received with gladness.
P.S. I am glad to see your face Tom, I’ve missed you.
Roy wrote:The truth is that you’re not odd—you’re special. When white light falls on a wall, it makes a white wall. But when it passes through a prism, that same light makes a rainbow on the wall…[Like God during creation, I’d like to say]”Let there be light.” All kinds of light! Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, and violet light. We need our differences.” (Lighten up! 17)
Roy, nice quote! That concept Sister Okazaki taught was the exact idea I had and wanted to represent it as my avatar.
One key concept is that although the colors are different, they are ALL from the same light source, and actually prettier than just white light on white walls. What a great teacher she was!
I love that quote, Roy. As I said, “Lighten Up!” is an amazing book.
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