- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
I read an article detailing a study about the increased prevalence of cosmetic surgery among LDS. The study authors observe a correlation between an increase in cosmetic surgery rates and “costly grace.”
Quote:Costly grace is a theological concept emphasizing that forgiveness and salvation are dependent on human effort, and it requires a commitment to living a morally aligned life.
I theorize that costly grace encourages comparisons between yourself and others in your religious community. I believe these comparisons then lead to an increased desire to present yourself in the best possible light. It think that this environment of comparisons and putting your best foot forward can lead to feelings of inadequacy in other areas. This seems to me to be an unintended side effect of church teachings and culture (that might seem surprising just on the face of the doctrinal teachings).
The correlation between LDS membership and cosmetic surgery rates has been the subject of articles for a while.
https://www.usu.edu/uwlp/blog/2017/cosmetic-surgery-and-body-image-among-utah-women https://dailyutahchronicle.com/2021/10/28/soter-salt-lake-city-mormon-culture-plastic-surgery/ https://www.vice.com/en/article/pkd3b7/housewives-of-salt-lake-city-plastic-surgery-mormon-church I found some context on this issue from Old Timer on a previous post. Quote:A relatively high rate of plastic surgery per capita – but the numbers aren’t radically different and the surrounding states send lots of people to SLC for medical plastic surgery as a result of birth defects and physical trauma, and the figures don’t differentiate between cosmetic elective surgery and medically necessary plastic surgery.
https://forum.staylds.com/viewtopic.php?t=4034&hilit=cosmetic About 10-15 year ago or so, I remember watching a news clip reporting on the prevalence of Utah parents buying their young adult daughters implants. The usual reason for getting these implants was so that she would be more able to attract an RM. I was just in Utah last weekend. Every time I go, I am always struck at how… nice… everything looks. Most people I saw dressed a little better in their casual wear (e.g. polos instead of t-shirts). The buildings and landscaping often look like a little more money has been put into them. The most striking thing I remember seeing on my trip was a large fountain in a McDonald’s drive-thru. Can’t say I’ve seen that in any other drive-thru I’ve been in. You can find exceptions of course, but in general, that state always seems very concerned with its outward appearance.
Yeah, the linked articles note the same trends. Quote:Ironically, Mormon doctrine says the body is a temple and that it doesn’t need to change. But, Utah’s culture tells a different story and so does the state’s plastic surgery rates. “There is a specific tie in Utah culture that is not said, but felt, the way that you appear on the outside is a reflection of how your soul is doing.”
and
Quote:An in-depth research study on cosmetic surgery among Mormon women explored this possibility and found a common belief among many participants (the vast majority of whom live in Utah) that physical beauty was a key means of securing status as a Mormon woman, particularly as marriage and motherhood are often prioritized above educational or career achievement. Study participants saw elective cosmetic surgery as an acceptable means of achieving and maintaining that standard of beauty.
Doesn’t shock me since members of the church are often into material things, despite constantly preaching against it. I still recall a testimony meeting where my Bishop was warning the youth to not be caught up with worldy ways. Meanwhile his wife was a walking barbie doll with implants, botox, the whole 9 yards. Oh and he just made his year BMW purchase too. Really just feeds into that narrative that members of the church are fake
I think that it might be an unintended consequence of encouraging women to “stay at home” and be “home-centered” instead of “career centered”. If you caretake your husband as the primary breadwinner for 20 years while raising kids and the like – you literally can’t afford for him to “stop paying attention” to you as he is your source of retirement… and plastic surgery is a way to “keep his attention during his midlife crisis” (at least on the surface) so that you aren’t “replaced by a younger model”. Not that the grass is necessarily greener on the career side. Becoming the witchlike wizened crone is the narrative for being single and undefended – and discriminated against. There are statistics out there that show bust size and attractiveness raise income. I had a friend in college who was a waitress and she reported a significant tip increase on those days she wore makeup. A blatant example comes to us from Mythbusters actually.
Quote:Storm in a D-Cup: …They focused on the tips Kari collected from the first 80 male customers on each shift. During the “small” and “medium” shifts, she collected $72 in tips, while the “large” shift yielded $98, with both men and women tipping almost 40% more. The team classified the myth as confirmed.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MythBusters_(2014_season)https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MythBusters_(2014_season)” class=”bbcode_url”> I don’t know if it is a primarily female self-image thing and/or a self-preservation mechanism – but I doubt that our religion and religious culture are immune from it – and I actually think that our religious culture makes it harder to see women for who they are because of the intense focus on “performing gender” our religious culture has.
AmyJ wrote:
I think that it might be an unintended consequence of encouraging women to “stay at home” and be “home-centered” instead of “career centered”. If you caretake your husband as the primary breadwinner for 20 years while raising kids and the like – you literally can’t afford for him to “stop paying attention” to you as he is your source of retirement… and plastic surgery is a way to “keep his attention during his midlife crisis” (at least on the surface) so that you aren’t “replaced by a younger model”.Not that the grass is necessarily greener on the career side. Becoming the witchlike wizened crone is the narrative for being single and undefended – and discriminated against. There are statistics out there that show bust size and attractiveness raise income. I had a friend in college who was a waitress and she reported a significant tip increase on those days she wore makeup. A blatant example comes to us from Mythbusters actually.
Quote:Storm in a D-Cup: …They focused on the tips Kari collected from the first 80 male customers on each shift. During the “small” and “medium” shifts, she collected $72 in tips, while the “large” shift yielded $98, with both men and women tipping almost 40% more. The team classified the myth as confirmed.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MythBusters_(2014_season)https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/MythBusters_(2014_season)” class=”bbcode_url”> I don’t know if it is a primarily female self-image thing and/or a self-preservation mechanism – but I doubt that our religion and religious culture are immune from it – and I actually think that our religious culture makes it harder to see women for who they are because of the intense focus on “performing gender” our religious culture has.
That’s so sad. I saw that quite a bit of that in my homeward growing up. And it had a weird ripple effect where the women in the ward were seemingly having a compeititon amongst each other who could become the fittest, most attractive and most loved by their husbands. Apparently the relief society in my ward was having weekly nuskin meetings or whatever they were called. It really did a number on many women’s self esteem. It’s really messed up. And yep you nailed it with the attractiveness = more money and success. It’s such a sad thing.
PazamaManX wrote:
About 10-15 year ago or so, I remember watching a news clip reporting on the prevalence of Utah parents buying their young adult daughters implants. The usual reason for getting these implants was so that she would be more able to attract an RM.I was just in Utah last weekend. Every time I go, I am always struck at how… nice… everything looks. Most people I saw dressed a little better in their casual wear (e.g. polos instead of t-shirts). The buildings and landscaping often look like a little more money has been put into them. The most striking thing I remember seeing on my trip was a large fountain in a McDonald’s drive-thru. Can’t say I’ve seen that in any other drive-thru I’ve been in. You can find exceptions of course, but in general, that state always seems very concerned with its outward appearance.
Most of my family is from Utah. (cousins, uncles, grandparents). Still remember how disgusted by grandma was when I wore red vans that “looked old” when we went up to visit them. I also remember my grandpa constantly talking up city creek center like it’s the best thing since sliced bread. People from SLC seem to be very proud of all that new development for some strange reason. I think it’s because like you said it’s new and shiny or whatever. I even have a friend who lives in SLC, talks up the place like it’s a utopia. My grandparents have passed, so my family really doesn’t have reason to visit there anymore. And honestly I’m kind of glad. I have no clue how non-members, or members like myself who are a bit more progressive survive up there.
I think sort of “keeping up with the Joneses” has become a part of the church culture, particularly in the Corridor. I think it exists outside the Corridor but since we are so mixed with non-members sometimes we don’t want to “keep up.” But I do think the “nice house” and “perfect family” among established members are pretty prevalent across the U.S. I do agree with your original point Roy, I think members like to “look good” and especially around each other. Grooming and dress seem to be important to some members.
I have a friend who works for a large builder in Utah. Their company can’t be any busier. They primarily build single family homes in new developments. They are mostly “cookie cutter” homes, built with several variations of the same basic idea because that’s what people seem to want to buy (and they can’t build them fast enough). He says the housing shortage there could be decreased in a couple ways. One is that the basics of these houses they primarily build all have a couple living rooms, a family room, at least 5 bedrooms (often more), 3-4 or more full baths, great rooms, and huge kitchens. His take on that is that everybody has to have a house at least as good as their co-workers and other ward members. He has no doubt building smaller, more affordable houses would alleviate some of the housing problems.
Another evidence I see of keeping up is the Mormon Mommy social media presence. These posts tend to be all perfect family activities where the three-year-old shows up to the perfect kitchen and makes perfect cookies with the perfect 1950s style TV mom. To me those things are so obviously staged, but I’m not sure the other Mormon Mommies see that, and they have to have their posts be at least as perfect and preferably better.
I may be cynical but I tie much of this into the worthiness culture of the church. Just my opinion and point of view.
One other anecdote. When we were young marrieds and had young children there was a divorced mother of 5 boys in our ward. We admired her and her family. The boys, at that time ranging in age from mid teens to probably around 5 or 6, would all come into church dressed in their white shirts and ties and sit in their row perfectly behaved. Never an issue in Primary or YM either. Only much later did we learn how coerced that behavior was, all for the point of showing how great a mother she was and what great church members they were. Now, only the oldest has any regular contact with her, and he is the only one semi-active in the church.
DarkJedi wrote:
I think sort of “keeping up with the Joneses” has become a part of the church culture, particularly in the Corridor. I think it exists outside the Corridor but since we are so mixed with non-members sometimes we don’t want to “keep up.” But I do think the “nice house” and “perfect family” among established members are pretty prevalent across the U.S.
It can certainly be found everywhere, but there is something special about Utah, and not in a good way. I live in what I guess could be considered the outer rim of the corridor. We have many of the same conditions as Utah. We are swarming with members (my town alone has more than 40 wards spread across 5 stakes). We are booming economically. Similar to Utah, housing cannot be built fast enough. I know many people who have more money than they know what to do with. But, somehow and thankfully, most people here are still pretty down to earth.
I’ve never had the misfortune of living in Utah, so I can only speculate from the outside on why they are how they are. Church culture and wealth are certainly a big part of it, but there’s got to be more to it than that. What that is though, I don’t know.
Specifically on the church culture surrounding the importance of keeping property beautiful and well maintained, SWK said the following in 1974 in his talk “God Will Not Be Mocked.” Quote:Now, brothers and sisters, we have launched a cleanup campaign. We are a throw-away people. Trash piles grow faster than population by far. Now we ask you to clean up your homes and your farms. “Man is the keeper of the land, and not its possessor.”
Broken fences should be mended or removed. Unused barns should be repaired, roofed, painted, or removed. Sheds and corrals should be repaired and painted, or removed. Weedy ditch banks should be cleared. Abandoned homes could probably be razed. We look forward to the day when, in all of our communities, urban and rural, there would be a universal, continued movement to clean and repair and paint barns and sheds, build sidewalks, clean ditch banks, and make our properties a thing of beauty to behold.
We have asked leaders of youth groups, auxiliary organizations, and priesthood quorums to give power to this concentrated action for beautification.
There seems to be a desire to look well maintained and kept as individuals, as families, and as communities.
Roy wrote:
Specifically on the church culture surrounding the importance of keeping property beautiful and well maintained, SWK said the following in 1974 in his talk “God Will Not Be Mocked.”Quote:Now, brothers and sisters, we have launched a cleanup campaign. We are a throw-away people. Trash piles grow faster than population by far. Now we ask you to clean up your homes and your farms. “Man is the keeper of the land, and not its possessor.”
Broken fences should be mended or removed. Unused barns should be repaired, roofed, painted, or removed. Sheds and corrals should be repaired and painted, or removed. Weedy ditch banks should be cleared. Abandoned homes could probably be razed. We look forward to the day when, in all of our communities, urban and rural, there would be a universal, continued movement to clean and repair and paint barns and sheds, build sidewalks, clean ditch banks, and make our properties a thing of beauty to behold.
We have asked leaders of youth groups, auxiliary organizations, and priesthood quorums to give power to this concentrated action for beautification.
There seems to be a desire to look well maintained and kept as individuals, as families, and as communities.
1. The SWK quote reminds me of the tension surrounding “organizing nature”. The trend to build a bunch of dams and then 50 years later tear them down again is another illustration of this.
1A. If everyone took this to heart and “threw away” all the removed and razed stuff – well, our landfills and recycling processes are likely not prepared for that.
2. Sometimes, “clothes make the man” and “starting from the outward and moving inward” works. But I much prefer KC Davis’s philosophy that mental health and wellbeing starts with shifting “chores and responsibilities” to “care tasks” and “personal accommodations” to create a “functional” life from wherever you are. Her slogans are “Chores are Morally Neutral” and “You are worthy of self-care and self-accommodations”.
Roy wrote:
Specifically on the church culture surrounding the importance of keeping property beautiful and well maintained, SWK said the following in 1974 in his talk “God Will Not Be Mocked.”Quote:Now, brothers and sisters, we have launched a cleanup campaign. We are a throw-away people. Trash piles grow faster than population by far. Now we ask you to clean up your homes and your farms. “Man is the keeper of the land, and not its possessor.”
Broken fences should be mended or removed. Unused barns should be repaired, roofed, painted, or removed. Sheds and corrals should be repaired and painted, or removed. Weedy ditch banks should be cleared. Abandoned homes could probably be razed. We look forward to the day when, in all of our communities, urban and rural, there would be a universal, continued movement to clean and repair and paint barns and sheds, build sidewalks, clean ditch banks, and make our properties a thing of beauty to behold.
We have asked leaders of youth groups, auxiliary organizations, and priesthood quorums to give power to this concentrated action for beautification.
There seems to be a desire to look well maintained and kept as individuals, as families, and as communities.
Reminds me of going to stake dances. I’m not sure if it was church wide or up to the stakes but I remember when the dress code was basically church attire. And when I was about 16 they relaxed it somewhat but it was still pretty lame. I think for guys it was a minimum of a collard shirt and long pants, and for girls it was long pants and a “modest” top. They then would have adult cheperones at the front door to basically check people for this which was even weirder. I thought it was odd to have a dress code for something such as a stake dance
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.