- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
So my husband who is an amazing person and a TBM is in his mid-40’s and an Elder. Most of the Elder’s quorum are newlyweds in their 20’s. He says that he always dreaded being one of those “old guys” in the Elders quorum and now realized that he is. I hate it for him, there is this low level embarrassment that the hasn’t been given a calling “high enough” to be a high priest yet. There are many people younger than him in the High Priests group and most of the men his age in the ward are. It just seems so unfair to have this very obvious divide.
Why can’t the church just make a policy of ordaining someone to be a high priest once they reach a certain age? They do it for all the other common priesthood offices.
In the not-too-distant past, there was an unwritten rule that once an elder hit 40, it was time to graduate to the HP group. I don’t know if this is a church-wide policy, but my stake has the exact opposite policy now. We do not “age promote” to the HP group. The only way into the HP group is to have a calling that requires ordination as a HP. We have several 60-something elders, consequently. However, they attend HP group meetings on Sunday – go figure. Rebeccad Tell your husband to wear his age with pride. I am also mid forties and “still” an elder. Does it feel awkward? Yes but ultimately it’s the same priesthood. Being a high priest is just a label.
Comparing the teaching and instruction in the various wards I have been in over the years while visiting other places…. I would rather be in a Elder’s Quorum being taught over High Priests anyday. Don’t know what it is… but EQ instruction seems to be more spiritual and interesting
After having my very TBM brothers-in-law both become HPs by 23 and hearing their stories of being in HP each week, I decided that I want to become the oldest elder ever. In fact I would be more than happy to not have to go to HP until I’m at least 90 🙂 I would try to look at it as an opportunity to share my wisdom of age with younger men who need that type of perspective in their lesson discussions. When it’s just young, idealistic men with relatively little experience, the discussions can get just a wee bit optimistic and out-of-whack pretty easily. Besides, 40’s really isn’t all that young to be an Elder in many wards and branches. I know lots of Elders who are at least that age.
Finally, there is NO difference in Priesthood authority between an Elder and a High Priest, except for specific leadership callings. The majority of Elders and High Priests in most units have the exact same authority and responsibility. Even the Bishopric Counselors have almost no real authority, since almost everything they do technically is at the bidding of or permission from the Bishop and only advisory in nature. Conducting meetings isn’t fun for most of them, and the only other things that are unique are the temple recommend interviews and the counseling with auxiliary leaders – and High Counselors have even less authority and responsibility than Bishopric Counselors.
Right now, as a Sunday School teacher, I have exactly the same Priesthood authority as most of the Elders in my ward – and there have been many weeks over the last 15 years that I would have enjoyed meeting with men who were closer to my own age – those men being Elders. I’m leaving that age period behind now (have been for a while, really), and it’s more than a little weird to realize I “fit” visually into the High Priests Group better than the Elders Quorum. I’m still one of the youngest in the group, but the gap is closing far too quickly.
Quote:I would rather be in a Elder’s Quorum being taught over High Priests anyday.
QFT. I would looove to be able to go back to EQ. But I know what you mean. It does seem kind of arbitrary and unnecessarily hierarchical.I just found an old thread on this topic and bumped it, and I also wanted to link to a post I did back in the day on this topic (way back – 2009 at Mormon Matters). I still think this is a silly one. Someone once said to me that it would be difficult for the old guys to relate to the young guys, to which I had to say the obvious: “Like the 88 year old women in RS trying to relate to the 18 year old ones??” Apparently love of hierarchy is a male trait. http://mormonmatters.org/2009/12/16/eq-to-hpg-rites-of-passage/ I think it’s a matter of fellowship, and I think the HP should have the freedom to attend whichever quorum he feels most comfortable with. He can be an Elder attending HP for example. I became a HP in my early 30’s. I liked it a lot although I felt the HP’s didn’t listen to my opinion when I shared it in meetings, but I also really liked hearing the perspective of all the rough stones rolling…some of whom were done rolling in the Church, and were in the reflection period about the roll.
In my ward we have several elders who just attend with the HP and I think few people know they are not HP. Depending on your ward and your bishop, your husband might be able to simply attend with the HP no questions asked. I realize that not everyone is the same, but I avoid HP meetings whenever I can and I much prefer the EQ meetings. Granted I’m at the age that could fit in either group.
Be careful for what you wish for. All kidding aside, if he would be more comfortable with the HP just talk to your Bishop and if he is any kind of caring leader he shouldn’t have a problem with him attending. We have had several Elders attend with our HP. I do know that they use to make older guys HP but they stopped doing that years ago. They found that the Elder quorums were running out of leaders because every one was being advanced. I know that in a few wards some HP have been asked to help and attend the EQ because of such unequal numbers. rebeccad wrote:
Why can’t the church just make a policy of ordaining someone to be a high priest once they reach a certain age? They do it for all the other common priesthood offices.I think most Bishops are aware of this, but they are limited in what they can do. Personally I wouldn’t want to be pushed ahead into the senior quorum at any specific age, if I go I would want it to be right. I have know very astute, capable and willing aging men that have remained elders for many years and I hope nobody ever feels shame for it, though everyone has their preference. I have also known elders that relate to and prefer to meet with high priests even though they have not been ordained, you may check with your bishop and HPGL to see if that may be an acceptable option.
church0333 wrote:just talk to your Bishop and if he is any kind of caring leader he shouldn’t have a problem with him attending.
Um, no, caring isn’t an adjective that is often associated with him.
He has addressed his concerns with the bishop, but hasn’t received any kind of response. The divide is pretty big in our ward. There are very few elders over the age of 25, much less 40.
Quote:There are very few elders over the age of 25, much less 40.
Wow.
That’s all.
rebeccad wrote:So my husband who is an amazing person and a TBM is in his mid-40’s and an Elder. Most of the Elder’s quorum are newlyweds in their 20’s. He says that he always dreaded being one of those “old guys” in the Elders quorum and now realized that he is.
I hate it for him, there is this low level embarrassment that the hasn’t been given a calling “high enough” to be a high priest yet. There are many people younger than him in the High Priests group and most of the men his age in the ward are. It just seems so unfair to have this very obvious divide.
Why can’t the church just make a policy of ordaining someone to be a high priest once they reach a certain age? They do it for all the other common priesthood offices.
Realistically he should feel good about being one of the younger guys.
Most of the High Priests I remember growing up had grand children and some even had great grand children. They were all the old grandpa’s of the ward.
My Dad received multiple invitations to join up with the High Priests Group once he was in his 40’s. He had yet to be a Grandpa at that point. His hairline only just started to recede and he didn’t have too much grey at that point. My Dad would always turn down the offer.
I recall on one occasion where they were for sure going to make him a high priest. I had just become a teacher (Priesthood rank after deacon but before priest) he gladly requested to remain an Elder so he could be my home teaching companion. Had I not just been made a teacher without a H.T. companion my dad would have been made a High Priest.
High Priest = OLD
Elder = Younger guy.
He shouldn’t have to worry about turning in his younger guy card in just yet. Maybe wait until he is 50.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.