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oint being, that people like Poppyseed and I should not be seen as anti-gay or homophobes just because whe do not accept everything associated with homosexuality.
Thank you, Bridget. And Ray too. I don’t accept every behavior about hetero-sexuality either.
bridget_night wrote:the facts about homosexuality starting in Junior high.
I appreciate your comments, bridget. I’m not sure if you meant the above statement. I think it would be better stated that homosexuality becomes “recognized” most commonly as early as junior high. In retrospect, most homosexuals don’t think that their homosexuality had a moment where it “started”. They were just always that way and, at some point, recognized what that was or what that was called.
I was about to leave it at that, but it’s in that moment of recognition that many homosexuals also start the damaging process of self-hate, self-loathing because of the way that society treats homosexuality. No matter how deeply we feel about any part of this issue, the one underlying concept that I feel must be changed is the attitude that there is something “wrong” with homosexuality. As long as most people/alot of people feel that this God-given difference is “wrong”, then young teens who recognize this sexuality will inherently beat themselves up about it.
Unconditional love is the answer. Even if homosexuality were “wrong”, our only job is to love and support. Even if homosexuality were a “sin”, our only job is to love and support. Even if you believe in a jealous God, you could understand that that God has no need to punish “sinners”. Punishment is inherent in the process of life, whatever that means to you.
If everyone could realize that we all have our own journey, that, ultimately, we all have to decide the big things of life for ourselves, then we could get on to the purpose of a Christ-driven life: loving unconditionally and “being with those that are being”.
Dear Friends, I just want all of you to know that I don’t consider ANYONE on this board as homophobic. You are all too nice. People who are loving, kind, act out of genuine concern for others and interest in their welfare are NOT homophobic in the sense I was referring to.
When I say that I am disturbed by homophobia, I am specifically referring to those organized hate groups which promote violence and hatred toward others. This is different than the loving parent or friend who teaches the law of chastity. I have friends who are gay and I don’t want them to be exposed to viral disease, domestic violence, exploitation etc. This is the same for my children and friends who are heterosexual.
I cannot post here, on this forum, the horrible, hateful ads that were posted in the Salt Lake Tribune by a certain group. They were so awful that they would get me banned from this forum. Those of you who live in Salt Lake City know exactly which group and which ad I am referring to. This is homophobia. This is the type of propaganda that gets young men and women killed in hate crimes. These ads were posted by a group of Latterday “Saints”. This is what is so very damaging to the Church.
Swimordie–I totally understand what you are saying. It was horrible during the time my son was so self-loathing. I don’t have a problem with explaining what homosexuality is to upper elementary school kids and talk about anti-bullying. The topic of homosexuality is so prevelant now on television, movies, etc, that young people are going to ask about it. I have talked to my 14 year old and 17 year old grandsons about their gay uncle(s) as my daughters husband also has a gay brother. I asked them how kids in junior high and high school treat and talk about gays. Apparently, it is becoming a much for tolerant group because they said that they are treated better now and most friends have gay friends at school. So, I was happy to hear that. As I talked to them about their gay uncles, (which they were surprised to find out) because they are not the sterotype of effeminate, I made sure they realized that people do not choose to have these feelings. They just become aware of them like they do about their heterosexuality. We discussed bi-sexuals as well. We also discussed that people can choose to be moral though and how we treat each other. Wallace, I too am appalled at how horrible gays have been treated and still are like the commentaries out of salt lake mention. This was one of my greatest fears when my son came out. I was so worried how kids would treat him at school, church, and at his job. I had nightmares of seeing my sweet son being beat up and dying like Matthew Sheppard. This is why I support hate-crime bills as long as they do not infringe on religious beliefs.
Well, we have to fight hate wherever we find it. Inside of the church and inside of ourselves. Our circumstances and our biology is irrelevant. I know that sometimes LDS people can be idiots but anyone with half a brain and who takes the time to do their homework will know what comes from the church and what doesn’t. I don’t think there is any evidence in any time when the church itself has been part of hate campaigns. Have they played an ignorant role at times, perhaps yes. But this a far cry from the kind of mentality that killed Matthew Shepherd. I agree Poppyseed. I do not think the church leaders or church condoms or wants any hate towards anyone. But, I do think there are alot of people, in and outside the church who are homophobic and ugly towards gays. Our bishops and members in my ward were very loving to our son when they knew and when I talked to our stake president about my book and our family, the first question he asked was “How is your son?How are people treating your son? That meant so much to me because he did not want people treating our son badly. The stake leaders really listened when my husband was in the high council and explained how many SSA people are in the wards, stakes and church and that we are loosing them because we don’t reach out. At two of the Evergreen conferences I attended they had classes for Bishops, RS Presidents and church leaders to learn about this issue and ask questions. One bishop asked, “What should I do if a young man or woman comes to me with this issue. I raised my hand and told him and all the leaders there. The first thing you should do is reach out and just hug them and tell them how sorry they are that they have had to deal with this issue. Second tell them that these feelings are not a sin and that they know that they did not choose to having these feelings. With female SSA women, I recommended they have either a good RS President or YW leader with him as female SSA women, often fear men, especially when they have been abused. Nevertheless, there is still too much ignorance and ridicule of gays by members. I have seen missionaries make fun of gays at times and my son’s SS teacher when he was 15 told the class that gays were an abomination and were going to hell. The teacher also said that we don’t have people like that in the church thank goodness. So, I have often wondered why so many SSA people in the church are terrified to come out and thinking they are going to hell for having these feelings.
swimordie wrote:
Unconditional love is the answer. Even if homosexuality were “wrong”, our only job is to love and support. Even if homosexuality were a “sin”, our only job is to love and support. Even if you believe in a jealous God, you could understand that that God has no need to punish “sinners”. Punishment is inherent in the process of life, whatever that means to you.Did I write this????
I should have…..
😆 I too like this idea of unconditional love whether you agree or disagree with a person. I just learned about this one of the presiding patriarch who was gay and had to be quietly released.: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Joseph_Fielding_Smith_%28presiding_patriarch%29 and wondered if any of you knew about this. It’s the first I have ever heard on this. Also, why was the calling of presiding patriarch canceled?
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