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Rix wrote:
I found that the only people I craved being with were my family — not because of some afterlife togetherness paradigm, but because there was a natural, present connection that was evident. I came to love them absolutely unconditionally. I rejoiced in their happiness…however they found it. I stopped trying to change them from living what worked for me, and enjoyed seeing where their spirits took them, and each of them was unique.
I found a new circle of friends — people that stimulated my mind and soul. They were also unconditional. We don’t need to talk daily…we can go months and then meet for lunch and it seems we are still best friends. But if I ever need help, I have dozens of people there for me — and I for them.
My life since then has been indescribably ecstatic. When you don’t need others to tell you you’re okay, there’s no reason not to be!
Rix, I loved your post! It really resonated with me. Thank you for sharing it!
Rix wrote:swimordie wrote:
Many years ago I was forced to leave. I didn’t know what to do after getting out of bed in the morning. My entire purpose of life, and each day’s activity, was dictated by the church. I literally went to live in the wilderness hoping that nature would heal my soul.It did.
My life since then has been indescribably ecstatic. When you don’t need others to tell you you’re okay, there’s no reason not to be!
~Rix
Rix, What do you mean when you said you were forced to leave the church? So, you are not in the church now? And your life is ecstatic now?
Explain more please?
The reason I ask is that my husband left the church about 3 years ago and things are so much better in our marriage since he left. He is much easier to get along with now and happier as a person. Every time people ask me at church how my husband is doing (he was in the high council for years before he left), I am not quite sure what to say. So many suppose that his life must be miserable now that he has left the church and our marriage would be on the rocks. I tell my visiting teacher, who is also the bishops wife,” I can’t exactly get up in fast and testimony meeting and say that things are so much better since my husband has left the church.” Mind you, his leaving really did not have anything to do with the church being wrong for us, but he is a perfectionist and was always gone in callings and had no time for us. His personality type used the gospel as a hammer to hit us over the head with in obeying ALL the commandments strictly. He had joined the church on an intellectual testimony and thought the spiritual one would come. It never did and that is why he finally left after 30 years in the church and my telling him if he does not change, I’m leaving. I felt the spirit witness to me that God withheld a testimony from him so he would not be even more of a tyrant with the gospel over his family. Now, not knowing whether the church or gospel is true or not, he is not so controlling and shows more love and concern for not losing his family.
I can’t wait to see Rix’s answer. bridget_night wrote:Every time people ask me at church how my husband is doing (he was in the high council for years before he left), I am not quite sure what to say.
Arrrrggghhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!! Why do we (and I mean “I”) do this?!? Why is it we can’t just say the obvious and natural thing: “Oh! It’s amazing how much better things are now. I’m so grateful for where he is in his life now.” Why, oh why, oh why?
Amen, Tom. “Wonderful! Thanks so much for asking,” would be my favorite response. No details; no elaboration; just the basic facts – that leaves each person free to ask for more or not, whatever is best for him or her.
Old-Timer wrote:“Wonderful! Thanks so much for asking,”
I love it. “Wonderful!
bridget_night wrote:Rix wrote:
Many years ago I was forced to leave. I didn’t know what to do after getting out of bed in the morning. My entire purpose of life, and each day’s activity, was dictated by the church. I literally went to live in the wilderness hoping that nature would heal my soul.It did.
My life since then has been indescribably ecstatic. When you don’t need others to tell you you’re okay, there’s no reason not to be!
~Rix
Rix, What do you mean when you said you were forced to leave the church? So, you are not in the church now? And your life is ecstatic now?
Explain more please?
I mentioned in my intro that I got addicted to pain meds after an injury. I was a bishop at the time, and a few years later when I dealt with the rehab process, I was called in to a “court of love.” I was ex’d for using the pills while a church leader. It was understandable…the reputation of the church is important to them. I was re-baptized a few years later, but my approach to the church has been different since then. I attend many different churches, depending on the speakers/topics…and which friends are going. I still consider myself LDS, as I said before, as it is my tribe. I was “TBM” for 40 years, so it is in my DNA!
I call my life “ecstatic” now for many reasons, but particularly because I’ve come to learn what works for me and what doesn’t. I’ve shed the process of expectations and guilt. I don’t believe in “good and evil” like many do. I think that’s all man-made. I don’t “need” anything, really…but particularly many things others think are necessary (was that vague enough?
😆 
BUT, I could be wrong!
Rix wrote:I don’t “need” anything, really…but particularly many things others think are necessary (was that vague enough?
😆 BUT, I could be wrong!
I love you, brother. Thanks a million for being here.
Rix wrote:BUT, I could be wrong!
Having tried to live this way for over a year now, I’ve got to disagree with Rix on that final comment. From my perspective, YOU’RE RIGHT!
Tom Haws wrote:Rix wrote:I don’t “need” anything, really…but particularly many things others think are necessary (was that vague enough?
😆 BUT, I could be wrong!
I love you, brother. Thanks a million for being here.
Love you too, man! (now do we slap butts here???
😆 😡 BUT, I could be wrong!
Having tried to live this way for over a year now, I’ve got to disagree with Rix on that final comment. From my perspective, YOU’RE RIGHT!
Dems fightin words!!!
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