Inactive for months due to tithing. Can I still give my newborn a baby blessing with an expired reccomend?

[Anonymous]

:clap: :clap: :clap: :clap:

[Anonymous]

Good to hear.

[Anonymous]

So happy to hear this! We talk about “Leadership Roulette” and that can be a real thing but also many of our leaders genuinely want to be helpful and to facilitate what they perceive as our spiritual growth.

[Anonymous]

Well I’m happy to report that everything went well! It turned out to be a great experience! I have to admit I was a little nervous but it went by without anyone saying anything negative.

I’ve done pretty well at attending since the start of the new schedule in January. Which ended up revealing that I now have a new Bishop. The bishopric was changed back in July, and since I’ve only made it to Sunday school or priesthood the few times I went last year I never noticed. So this new bishop tried to contact me through his clerk twice during the end of last year, and I came up with any excuse possible for my wife and I to not meet up with him due to busy schedules (which was only true to an extent). The truth was I thought it was the previous bishop still and i was scared I was being called in with my wife to meet and get scolded for poor attendance and lack of paying tithing.

I was probably scared for no reason.

So I have a new bishop now and I’d like to try and get a current reccomend maybe by my birthday in April. But that means paying tithing again and I’m scared that no matter how I pay it might still be a problem that I’ll get cornered over.

Any advice on getting the courage to pay tithing again?

[Anonymous]

I am happy that things seem to be working out for you.

Quote:

Any advice on getting the courage to pay tithing again?

I’d say just jump in and pay what you feel comfortable with.

[Anonymous]

DarkJedi wrote:

I’d say just jump in and pay what you feel comfortable with.

This x1000. Whatever your tithing number is, it’s between you and the God. Any bishop who really drills down on this is overreaching. Furthermore, whatever you pay, pay directly to the church. If done so properly the amount paid will not show up on ward records. I have done this for years. In fact probably about 60% of my ward does the same. Including my bishop and counselors.

[Anonymous]

I ordained my son to the Aaronic Priesthood last Sunday in spite of being a non-TR holder. Also ordained him to a deacon and a teacher that way.

You got leadership roulette alright. I’d hold back on blessing your baby in the church until you can satisfy the Bishop you met his requirement. You’ll have to weigh the opinion of other family members in this, though.

The BP’s out of line, but your only recourse is to go to go back to the BP and ask for clarification given the FP letter (I didn’t read a lot of the details from the BP interaction so this might not be possible). But do it with the right wording, attitude and humility or it could make the BP even more stodgy about it.

I would, as a second alternative, ask the SP clarification. Do it in a spirit of being confused and seeking the truth. Quote your Bishop, quote the FP letter, ask for an opinion. Say you’ll do what is required, but you need clarification as the different sources don’t seem to agree and you don’t know what to do. And stress the impact on your financial situation and the stress it causes. Be humble and a truth seeker trying to figure out how to do the best thing in difficult circumstances.

Puts the SP in an awkward position because he might have to overturn his Bishop’s decision. Or you might find that the leadership roulette problem sits squarely in the SP’s office. Don’t know how many times people have complained about their Bishop’s or immediate supervisor’s position on an issue only to find that it was the person above them who is the source of the objectionable policy. In this case the SP, possibly.

I wouldn’t let someone else do the blessing though if you really want to do it. The child may someday see their membership record or if there is a certificate, the certificate. And then wonder why you didn’t do the blessing, and wonder why. Maybe even ask you.

Also, not doing the blessing puts pressure on the leaders. They get lists and things and may see the name of the baby come up in meetings all the time, have to talk around it, and know it’s a nagging issue. They may see your attendance drop off or commitment wane, and then feel guilty. A new Bishop could take over, or you could end up eventually in a TR interview a couple years later at the SP level. There you could let it drop that it took you two years due to the gross requirement with an “apology” for the impact of life circumstances on your ability to pay.

This could surprise the SP without putting him in a position to overrule the Bishop, since you did, in fact, eventually comply with the BP’s unwarranted rule. The SP might deal with it with the BP in an interview to the benefit of those who follow you. Or, you may find the Bishop relaxes the requirement in future interviews, to your benefit.

Note — you could give a father’s blessing to the child if you want in your home. That way the child gets all the blessings. I think they still go down on the church records but not as a child of record too — the only thing you lose is the experience of all kinds of loved ones joining in the blessing and the public display of affection. Even if the blessing happens sometime in the future, you could do it privately.

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