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LookingHard wrote:
Heber13 wrote:
SamBee wrote:
I’ve noticed that Family Search has an “Add Wife” function on it. I’ve clicked it several times, but haven’t even had a date yet, what gives?
😆 Another question…I’m already married…why is the “Add Wife” button still there?
Heber – I think if you click it, it will email your wife indicating that you clicked the button. I would think twice before doing that.
Hopefully the message to my wife doesn’t include anything about flaming swords. I best not try it out.
Heber13 wrote:
Another question…I’m already married…why is the “Add Wife” button still there?
To save precious disk space the church only programed their software to use two digits for the year when storing dates in their database. They never patched their family search server with the Y19C updates. It’s still operating on the pre-OD1 software.
Heber13 wrote:
SamBee wrote:
I’ve noticed that Family Search has an “Add Wife” function on it. I’ve clicked it several times, but haven’t even had a date yet, what gives?
😆 Another question…I’m already married…why is the “Add Wife” button still there?
We have to keep up Mormon stereotypes don’t we?
This isn’t a joke, but it is hilarious — gut-bustingly funny because it is true: Jared Kushner, Donald Trump’s son-in-law and nepotistic advisor, has been registered to vote for the last eight years as . . . wait for it . . .
a woman.
😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 😆 If Trump got the fraudulent voters off the rolls, half his cabinet would be in jail. (Oh wait, I think that’s going to happen anyway!) Quote:Once I saw this guy on a bridge about to jump.
I said, “Don’t do it!”
He said, “Nobody loves me.”
I said, “God loves you. Do you believe in God?”
He said, “Yes.”
I said, “Are you a Christian or a Jew?”
He said, “A Christian.”
I said, “Me, too! Protestant or Catholic?”
He said, “Protestant.”
I said, “Me, too! What franchise?”
He said, “Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Baptist or Southern Baptist?”
He said, “Northern Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist or Northern Liberal Baptist?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region, or Northern Conservative Baptist Eastern Region?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region.”
I said, “Me, too! Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1879, or Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912?”
He said, “Northern Conservative Baptist Great Lakes Region Council of 1912.”
I said, “Die, heretic!” And I pushed him over.
A few years before the outbreak of WWI, David Morris, a Welsh protestant minister, was in a terrible shipwreck. He found himself washed up, alone, on the shores of a small and uninhabited island. It was ten years before he was rescued. A ship was passing and had seen his smoke-signal.
The captain himself came ashore to meet the castaway, and was very impressed at the way Morris had kept himself busy bringing civilisation to the island.
“Oh I say! You’ve done very well! You were stranded here alone with no tools and you’ve built a little terrace of houses, a shop, an electricity generator … Oh, and you’ve built a chapel on the hill over there!”
The captain then noticed another chapel on the other hill. “But tell me, why did you build two of them?”
Morris replied: “Well, that’s the one I go to, see? And the other’s the one I don’t go to.”
I was opening up the building this morning and heard a hissing sound coming from the chapel and cultural hall… at first, I thought there was a problem with the boiler but when I went in there, there were all these pythons and rattlers writhing about on the floor like an Indiana Jones movie. “OH NO!” I screamed and I was about to phone pest control on my cellphone when a nine foot cobra sidled up to me and said, “Ssshh! Quiet! Switch off your phone. We’re holding Snake Conference!”
:clap: 😆 Someone in your SS class after you make a comment: You after someone else makes a comment in your SS class:
True story from church last week: Stake high councilman to DW: Are you keeping this husband of yours in line?
Me: Well, she certainly is my “better half!”
Stake high councilmen: Isn’t that the truth. I say the same thing about my wife and she never refers to me that way.
Me: I know, right? Why do they have to be so immodest?
…. High councilman looks at me awkwardly.
Me: I mean, why can’t they be more modest?
…. awkward look intensifies
Me: Not to say that they dress like harlots!
DW exasperated: We get it.
How many Mormons does it take to change a light bulb? – Four: One to say the opening prayer, one to change the lightbulb, one to say the closing prayer, and one to bring refreshments. If it is the Home Teachers, it only takes two, but you have to wait until the end of the month.
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