- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
“I laid down, looking up at the sky & thought where the heck is the ceiling?” – Steve Wright :clap: Featherina wrote:“I laid down, looking up at the sky & thought where the heck is the ceiling?” – Steve Wright
Quote:The truth is out there…Does anyone have the URL?
Each of you might or might not think this is funny – depending largely on your gender and the time of the month. 😈 Quote:How many women with PMS does it take to change a lightbulb?
Six.
Why?
IT JUST DOES, OK?!?!Quote:If Jesus came to dinner, I’d serve him wine. I’m Mormon, so I don’t have any wine – so I’d serve him water.
I think he’d manage.
That PMS joke is hillarious! 😆 =
*It’s all very well in practice, but it will never work in theory.
*The Wizard of Oz is really just a cautionary tale about the lengths a woman will go to for the right shoes.
*I’d imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.
*Yawning was originally meant for when you need to yell in a library.
*I don’t like the way this guy in the mirror is looking at me.
I’d rather have a butt in front of me than a frontal lobotomy. A kid was in Sunday School. His teacher asks — who knows the story of the prodigal son? Thye child puts up his hand and says “a son left his Dad, spent all his allowance, and when he returned home, his Dad ran out to greet him and hurt himself”.
Teacher sayd “Hurt himself??”
Kid says “Yeah, it says he ran out to meet his son, and then
fell on his neck“. *******************************************************************************************************************
How many Mormons does it take to change a lightbulb?
“Twenty. One to change the lightbulb and 19 to serve refreshments” **
Check out the following link: http://www.nerdist.com/2011/12/black-friday-prank/ The whole thing is hilarious, but the mention of a “Mormon disco ball” at the 3:00 mark left me in stitches.
Quote:Why do Mormon women stop having children at 40?
.
.
.
.
Because 41 is too many to handle.
Old-Timer wrote:Quote:Because 41 is too many to handle.
I love it!!DD yesterday morning (5 years old): “How long is church today?” Me: “3 hours”
DD pensively: “How long is church usually?”
Me: “3 hours”
DD in high pitched whine: “Awwwww, I thought today was supposed to be the
fastSunday!!!!!” Quote:When I was a child, I used to pray to God each night and ask him to give me a bicycle.
Then I got older and realized that’s not how God operates . . . so I stole one and prayed for forgiveness. (Emo Phillips)
Of course, there is the Catholic version:
Quote:When I was a child, I used to pray to God each night and ask him to give me a bicycle.
Then I got older and realized that’s not how God operates . . . so I confessed my intentions, gained absolution and then stole one. (Curtis)
Old-Timer wrote:Check out the following link:
http://www.nerdist.com/2011/12/black-friday-prank/ The whole thing is hilarious, but the mention of a “Mormon disco ball” at the 3:00 mark left me in stitches.
I like it when he explains:Quote:Its like a disco ball, but only for Mormons.
:wtf: Roy wrote:DD yesterday morning (5 years old): “How long is church today?”
Me: “3 hours”
DD pensively: “How long is church usually?”
Me: “3 hours”
DD in high pitched whine: “Awwwww, I thought today was supposed to be the
fastSunday!!!!!” 😆
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.