Law of Chastity

[Anonymous]

I have noticed that more women behave in a manner which is contrary to what I have read about the law of chastity. I did some research at lds.org and found the following:

Quote:

Chastity is sexual purity. Those who are chaste are morally clean in their thoughts, words, and actions. Chastity means not having any sexual relations before marriage. It also means complete fidelity to husband or wife during marriage.

Merely refraining from sexual intercourse outside of marriage is not sufficient in the Lord’s standard of personal purity. The Lord requires a high moral standard of His disciples, including complete fidelity to one’s spouse in thought and conduct. In the Sermon on the Mount, He said: “Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart” (Matthew 5:27–28). In the latter days He has said, “Thou shalt not . . . commit adultery, . . . nor do anything like unto it” (D&C 59:6). And He has reemphasized the principle He taught in the Sermon on the Mount: “He that looketh on a woman to lust after her, or if any shall commit adultery in their hearts, they shall not have the Spirit, but shall deny the faith and shall fear” (D&C 63:16). These warnings apply to all people, whether they are married or single.

The scriptures refer to men lusting after women. I’ve found that many women lust after men. For example, at another message board for LDS women, there was a post with a link to provocative photographs of the actor who plays Edward in the movie sequel to Twilight “New Moon.” Some of the women were commenting in such a way that I feel they were “lusting in their hearts.”

Call me a prude, but this behavior disturbs me. Wives complain about their husbands being snared by Internet p*rn. Do they not see that they have a problem akin to that?

Your thoughts?

[Anonymous]

Kalola, last September I wrote about the exact verses you discuss in this post. I will make one point here, then provide links to two posts I wrote on my own blog.

You are totally correct that sexually stimulating material affects both men and women – that the scripture you mention focuses on men simply because the scriptures focus on men. It was a sexist society, so it is what it is. The most interesting thing to me is the way that men and women often react to different material.

I know this is a generalization and stereotype, but visual images tend to affect men most strongly, while words tend to affect women more then they do men. I won’t go into detail, but “show me” and “talk to me” tend to be employed to differing degrees for men and women. I believe strongly that many women don’t make the connection to the Law of Chastity that reading a book constitutes, mostly because we have defined p0rn very narrowly as visual images – since that is what is most addicting to men.

Having said that, I personally think that many now are going overboard with how they apply the term “p0rn” to books. Perhaps this is only in the Mormon community, but I have read quite a few women who call the Twilight series p0rn because of the inclusion of sexual tension, even though there is no actual sexual intercourse portrayed until the last book when the Edward and Bella are married – and even though there is no “explicit” description of the act itself. I think we can go way over board in our definitions if we aren’t careful and end up with unhealthy aversions to and elimination of anything that is remotely sexual, but this also is perhaps the best example of a standard that is easy to blur and justify crossing the appropriate lines, as well.

Anyway, the links to the posts I wrote are:

“Becoming More Chaste in Thought and Deed” (http://thingsofmysoul.blogspot.com/2008/09/becoming-more-chaste-in-thought-and.html)

“An Expansive View of Chastity” (http://thingsofmysoul.blogspot.com/2008/09/expansive-view-of-chastity.html)

[Anonymous]

Ray – Thank you for your insights. I will be reading your blog entries on the topic.

[Anonymous]

Quote:

there was a post with a link to provocative photographs of the actor who plays Edward in the movie sequel to Twilight “New Moon.” Some of the women were commenting in such a way that I feel they were “lusting in their hearts.”

I will only add that there’s something skeevy (IMO) about lusting after an actor who is 1) young enough to be my prom baby (if I had had a prom baby), and 2) dumb as a post as revealed through interviews with him. Not to rain on the lust parade of others.

[Anonymous]

Quote:

I will only add that there’s something skeevy (IMO) about lusting after an actor who is 1) young enough to be my prom baby (if I had had a prom baby)

Thanks a lot, Hawk. Now I really feel old. He’s too young to be my prom baby by a few years.

[Anonymous]

Quote:

Thanks a lot, Hawk. Now I really feel old. He’s too young to be my prom baby by a few years.

Whew, I checked – senior prom, but prom baby nonetheless.

[Anonymous]

I like looking at beautiful people-men and women of all ages. But it never connects with lust for me.

I agree with Ray-

Women seem to have a vicarious experience when they read or watch romantic stories. They imagine themselves as the woman.

Men seem to be visually stimulated and imagine themselves with the woman.

Anyway, hubby and I watched Twilight together. My SIL reported it made her “hot and bothered” and she felt it was inappropriate for young girls. I found the movie funny (silly in parts) and didn’t have that reaction at all. I didn’t like the killing scenes.

Now, this thread made me have to look at the trailer for the New Moon movie. Kissing, angst, vampires and werewolves-it’ll make a lot of money.

I think we should remember that marriage is often used allegorically to symbolize our relationship with Deity.

It is impossible to be ONE with God (or your spouse) when your thoughts (words or deeds) are somewhere else. We cannot serve God and mammon.

[Author]

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