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I have not posted on this forum for some time, although I have been reading some threads now and then. Overall, since meeting with the Area Authority, I’ve been doing fine with my calling and staying active in the church. I’m not really looking for support right now (of course, feel free to comment), I just wanted to share something that my wife and I discussed a few weeks ago when Kate Kelly and John Dehlin were in the news. While watching an update on their story from the local news one night she asked me who they were and why they might be excommunicated (this was the first she had heard of it).
I was able to answer her questions, but I’m worried that how easily I was able answer them might have sent a signal to her about the extent of my issues with the church.
She already knew Kate Kelly (not the name), but the OW movement. I did explain who John Dehlin is, and how he has helped people that go through a “faith crisis”. But then I had to explain what a “faith crisis” was. Anyway, I think my wife might suspect that I have gone through my own “faith crisis”. Which might be OK, since she knows I’m still active in the church.
It sounds like you’ve done a good job of not letting it affect your marriage. So, since you are succeeding in that respect, and may not have a burning desire to get your wife to see your point of view or even empathize, I’d try to steer clear of the subject…. I support Silent on his comment. First – Kudos to you and your marriage. That is really hard to do. If she doesn’t ask anything, leave it there. If she does I would think talking about faith crisis in a third person mode would be the next kind step. Using phrases like, “There are members who…”, or “For some people they learn things that are historic but not taught in Sunday School, such as BYU students,”. That way it isn’t about you or her, it’s about the faith struggle experience. Much less threatening. Good luck. And nice to see you. I am glad so many things are going well for you.
I noticed you have been around in a bit DT, thanks for stopping by. I agree with the other two – let sleeping dogs lie. zzz Yes, I just let the conversation go. I didn’t feel the need to go further into things. Right now I’m just letting her lead any discussions about my own faith transition. DarkJedi wrote:I noticed you have been around in a bit DT, thanks for stopping by. I agree with the other two – let sleeping dogs lie.
We have been on some family vacations, attended some funerals and family reunions. A very busy summer so far.
Deepthinker wrote:Yes, I just let the conversation go. I didn’t feel the need to go further into things. Right now I’m just letting her lead any discussions about my own faith transition.
I always reinforce with my wife that she can ask me anything, at anytime, about my FC. I do make a point to talk about something I may have run across that day that might be testimony building, and mention it over dinner. An Uchtdorf quote always helps!
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