- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
The home page for this site now has a Library section. This is where we are storing essays, articles and interviews. http://www.staylds.com/?page_id=29 There are links to some of the MormonStories audio interviews. John Dehlin was kind enough to allow us to host some of them officially here at our site. I also have links to some good essays from members of our site.
Coming soon — “Why I Still Believe” interviews. This is a new series we are working on. The first should be available in the next 4 or 5 weeks (as I have time in my limited schedule to produce the first one, hehe).
Thank you soooo much. May all go well in your interviews. Looking forward to hearing them. I am in the Why I dont believe stage right now so I need alot of Why I Believe that doesnt sound like the normal Fast and Tesitmony stuff. I just see things so different than is presented most of the time. Monkey, have you listened to the Bushman series podcasts? And the Stages of Faith? Yes, Orson, I have. Only once though and need to listen again and again. I am just so far from wanting or needing to believe in the teachings of the church except that my integrity led me to tell the truth and now not have a recommend. The recommend for me was only for my children. Many of them are still left to be married and are expecting that I will be there. My current view is that I will NEVER believe in a way that I could in all integrity say yes to the first four questions of the TR interview. I have a secret hope that by some magic I will be able to once again say yes without being out of integrity AND without ignoring the truths I have discovered over the years. I simply would prefer to have my views and my relationship with the Universe and not have my children filled with worry, anger, concern, or pity with regard to me. None of them know yet. I do not expect them to know anytime soon.
Anyway, I appreciate your mentioning those podcasts. I am in the process of getting Fowler’s book through interlibrary loan.
I lost my testimony, if I ever had one, LONG before I discovered any tidbits of incongruent history of the church. My testimony went as a result of spiritual experiences outside the Mormon experience and I was converted immediately to a new way of seeing the world. I have been happy most of the time since. I was even happy between story telling sessions called TR interviews. I just plain have chosen to take the harder road I guess for now. It was much easier to do mental gymnastics for 2 or 3 days prior to interview so that I could be in personal integrity with whatever story I was telling myself while I answered the questions. The rest of the year I didnt think about it. I thought this would be easier being truely honest with myself and the Bishop. I accepted at the time that I may end up having to reveal myself to my children. Now I wonder how that will show up and what will happen to each of them and my relationship with them. It is all a mystery.
I need this board and the podcasts so that I can keep believing that it is possible to have personal integrity while answering in my head questions that the inquirer does not have in his head, if you know what I mean. I prefer open honesty AND I have not done that with my kids because what I have to share is NOT something duplicatable. I cannot give them my faith. I cannot provide for them the spiritual experiences I have had. I cannot move another person to be as motivated as I am to do good and love and be open to all things and all people. I like that the church occurs as duplicatable. Simple requirements, specific rewards. I did NOT get the rewards as promised and my children often do get them.
Anyway, blah blah blah. I appreciate all of you being here and caring.
You make some very good points Monkey. I wonder sometimes about how “truthful” we are supposed to be when someone asks “how do I look?” – especially when we think they’re as good as they’re going to get. I don’t think it’s dishonest to say “you’re beautiful” when you can argue that “everyone is beautiful.” Maybe the point is not that they need to become “more beautiful” for us to be able to say they are – but maybe the point is we need to learn to SEE the beauty that exists – for our own benefit. Maybe we need to say it even if we don’t understand it, maybe that can help us to actually see it. We all know that saying “you’re beautiful” to a Jason Alexander will not literally turn him into a Brad Pitt (I wanted to play it safe and steer clear of female imagery), but maybe it will help us see something that we may have previously missed.
Can this principle also apply to the TR interview?
Quote:Can this principle also apply to the TR interview?
“I believe. Help thou mine unbelief.”
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.