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Recently, I’ve been opening up to a lot of different people in my family and ward about my faith crisis, and how some of my core beliefs have changed as a result. The most typical response from family members has been concern, followed by questions about what I do and do not believe now. I’ve shared with each of them that, just because there are things that I no longer believe, that doesn’t mean that I don’t believe in anything anymore. It’s not all or nothing. But it got me thinking about the Articles of Faith. For so many years, I learned the Articles of Faith and recited them, just because that’s what you’re told to do in Primary and Seminary. I never stopped to think about whether or not I actually agreed with them, or even what they meant. In my TBM days, it didn’t matter. That’s just what ‘we’ believed. Now that I can let go of thinking about what ‘we’ believe, and I can think about what ‘I’ believe, I’ve reconstructed my own set of Articles of Faith. I just thought I’d share, and I hope some of you will share what your personal Articles of Faith would be, post FC. 1- I believe in God, the Eternal Father, in his Son, Jesus Christ, and in the Holy Ghost.
2- I believe that we are all responsible for our own behavior and sins.
3- I believe that, through the atonement of Jesus Christ, all mankind may be saved.
4- I believe that faith, repentance, baptism, and receiving the Holy Ghost are ways that we can express our desire to be closer to God.
5- I believe that God works through many righteous people on the Earth to bless the lives of others, regardless of religious affiliation.
6- I believe that Jesus Christ called Apostles in His day to spread His word throughout the world, and that His word continues to be spread due, in large part, to the work that they began.
7- I believe that we all have different talents and gifts, and that we can honor God by sharing our talents to serve and help others.
8- I believe that the Bible is heavily symbolic, and that wisdom and guidance can be found in that symbolism. I also believe the Book of Mormon contains many stories with good morals, as far as those stories are interpreted correctly.
9- I believe that God has, does, and will continue to inspire and guide mankind through His spirit.
10- I believe the Ten Tribes were not lost, but assimilated into the nations surrounding them.
11- I claim the privilege of worshiping God according to the dictates of my own conscience, and allow all men the same privilege; let them worship how, when, or what they may.
12- I believe in honoring, obeying, and sustaining the law.
13- I believe in doing good to all men, and treating others as I want to be treated.
Nicely done HC. I have used the AofF as a measure of where I stand in regard tot he church before, recognizing that I don’t fully agree word for word. I think I could (and may) write something similar to this for what I actually believe. Nice HC. Way to keep it positive. If you can’t tell from my posts as of the last few weeks, I am struggling more and more lately. I am finding it emotionally harder to stay “in” from an orthopraxy perspective and keep doing the Mormon things, but not having nearly as much belief in the church’s divinity. I was assuming I could keep doing this for many years, but over the last few months I am wondering if I really can. I am having to rethink this and ponderize it for a while. To me the big key is if I try to keep my recommend or not. And then beyond that what my wife’s reaction would be if I even partially came out to her. I am not sure if she would go the divorce route or not.
I realize part of it is that I am under stress at work and have had to travel a TON lately. I hope that working my tail end off ends by January or so.
I listened to John Dehlin’s comments on suggestions on how to leave and he stressed to not be anti-church, but just go find what is good for you and be positive about that. I think in the long run that is absolutely the better way.
And to tie it back to the thread, I do think I need to do one of these “what I do believe” and work towards.
I want to thank this forum for being a place to vent (sorry if I have done too much as of late), being validated and accepted here, and giving me some good feedback and perspective.
I love it. Thanks for sharing. I’d share my articles of faith but I’m worried I might scare a few people, including myself.
Holy Cow: Thank you so much for sharing these. I read your AofF and just sat back and said, “yea ….”
This last conference was the first time I have sat through all the sessions in many years. With less anger now, I was able to listen to the talks and find goodness. When I go to a Catholic mass, I can sit through services, find goodness there, and not expect to agree with everything. Mormonism and myself are coming to a similar relationship.
I am recognizing that I can listen to an LDS member talk about their beliefs and expect them to not be just like mine. Writing that, I went back and read it again, and I laughed. It is amazing to think that there was ever a time that I expected to believe exactly like all of my peers at church.
Quote:LookingHard wrote:
If you can’t tell from my posts as of the last few weeks, I am struggling more and more lately. I am finding it emotionally harder to stay “in” from an orthopraxy perspective and keep doing the Mormon things, but not having nearly as much belief in the church’s divinity. I was assuming I could keep doing this for many years, but over the last few months I am wondering if I really can. I am having to rethink this and ponderize it for a while. To me the big key is if I try to keep my recommend or not. And then beyond that what my wife’s reaction would be if I even partially came out to her. I am not sure if she would go the divorce route or not.
I realize part of it is that I am under stress at work and have had to travel a TON lately. I hope that working my tail end off ends by January or so.
It is great that you recognize what place stress from work has in this. That can be huge in increasing stress in other areas.
Marriage and relationships are hard. I have no advice.
My TR finally expired. For me, it was a positive. For you, I hope you can figure out your best path. Know that this FC Girl wishes you well.
Beautiful post. This is a huge part of peace and self-acceptance – being able to focus on, understand and articulate one’s own beliefs.
LookingHard wrote:
If you can’t tell from my posts as of the last few weeks, I am struggling more and more lately. I am finding it emotionally harder to stay “in” from an orthopraxy perspective and keep doing the Mormon things, but not having nearly as much belief in the church’s divinity. I was assuming I could keep doing this for many years, but over the last few months I am wondering if I really can. I am having to rethink this and ponderize it for a while. To me the big key is if I try to keep my recommend or not. And then beyond that what my wife’s reaction would be if I even partially came out to her. I am not sure if she would go the divorce route or not.
LH, sorry it’s taken me so long to respond to this. I haven’t been on much lately. I completely understand where you’re coming from. I’ve shared a lot of those same worries and concerns. Especially in regards to how your FC will impact your relationship with your wife. I suffered in silence for years before I talked with my wife about it, because I was worried that she wouldn’t accept me if she knew what I was feeling. When I finally did tell her what was in my head, she reacted just as I had feared. She didn’t talk to me for three days, and over the past few years she has grown more and more distant from me, and has gone to other people for emotional and spiritual support rather than sharing those things with me. That reaction made me feel like I shouldn’t share my FC with anyone else, because I’d get the same reaction. But, about a year after I talked with my wife, I decided to talk with her dad and my bishop. Both of them were VERY supportive and understanding. In recent months, I’ve also shared with a sister, my dad, my new bishop, an LDS friend from work, my brother-in-law, and other friends, and I’ve received very supportive and encouraging feedback from all of them. Unfortunately, my wife’s stance has continued to harden. About a month ago, she finally decided to move out. It’s been a heartbreaking process. Having an FC leaves a huge hole in your heart, and having somebody reject you because of that FC only tears the hole open wider. My wife was raised to be a very black/white thinker, but even her father, who instilled that thinking in her, is not having any luck getting her to see that things will be okay. Our bishop has also talked with her about it, but she has made up her mind that she needs to be with a ‘worthy priesthood holder’ and I am not one because I let my temple recommend expire years ago and don’t wear garments anymore. So, I completely understand your reluctance to talk to your wife about things. It’s a terrifying feeling, and I’ve found that sometimes that reluctance is completely valid. But, on the other hand, it’s a living hell feeling like you’re having to keep something from the person you love most. Having an FC sucks! It is freeing and enlightening in many ways, but there are other ways that it is just plain torture. I’m really sorry that you’re struggling with these thoughts about which direction to go. It’s something that we all have to figure out on our own, because we each have our own paths. But, like you said, it’s good to know that we can always come back to this site and there are people here who understand. And, I’ve been surprised to find that there are a lot more people in my social network who have been much more supportive than I thought they would be, as well. Good luck finding the right balance that works for you! I wish you the best in this.
So sorry to hear about your marriage HC. So very sorry. If it was just me and her alone I probably wouldn’t worry about it quite so much. But I am worried the impact it would have on my kids. I know sometimes that is an excuse for not confronting issues, but I keep coming back to that same spot (even after honest conversations with my wife). Life is just hard – period. I wish I was physically close to you so I could help you more. Best of luck.
HC: I am so sorry to hear that you have such tough stuff going on in your life. What a misery.
Don’t be a stranger. Check in and let us know how you are doing.
Let us truly be your community of support.
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