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I have wanted to ask this question for sometime. Ever since my faith crisis, my views & practice of personal prayer has changed & not in a good way.
Don’t get me wrong. I know the words. I just can’t feel the spirit that I’m getting through. (If you know what I mean.)
If I’m asked at church to give an opening or closing prayer, I can do it. That’s what I mean about knowing the words.
Before my FC, I would pray on a regular basis:
– Morning & Evening prayers.
– Blessing on the food.
– Blessing children & sick.
– Any special event.
After my FC, I feel differently about the desire to pray. It is not as personal as it was before the FC.
I’ve tried to find other posts on this topic & can’t find any.
Has anyone else felt the same way?
How did you get through it?
The only answer I have come up with is: my beliefs about prayer are different or evolved from what I experienced in the past.
Not good, just different.
I think that pre-faith prayers had specific meanings to us that made it so we “used” prayer as a process to give ourselves a “specific experience” (my wording isn’t amazing). It’s like prayer was the metaphysical blanket that we wrapped ourselves into when we were sick, when we needed comfort, when we needed a specific type of warmth.
Post-faith prayers tend to be “performance prayers” like starting and ending meetings, because the prayer itself doesn’t give ourselves “a specific experience” anymore.
We’re not sure anymore that the “blanket” we relied on then is actually a blanket, actually has enough weight to warm us (it doesn’t provide the warmth it used to due to our understanding of some gaping holes), and whether the best process itself is to wrap ourselves in that blanket or get up and turn the thermostat up (bypassing the blanket entirely).
Anyways, that’s my take on it
I am very much the same way. I will give a prayer in church if asked (but I haven’t been going of late so hard for that to happen) and my personal prayers are much more rare. I sometimes feel a sort of inner peace when I pray but not every time. I experience such inner peace at other times as well. How do I get through it? I think since my view of what prayer is has changed there’s nothing to get through. I don’t see prayer as necessary, especially when I believe I’m praying to a disinterested God (there’s that Deism again). I say hi every once in a while, express gratitude on occasion, more rarely express hopes, and I never ask for anything. Sometimes God says hi back in that feeling of peace.
In my orthodox days I did quite a lot of praying. Now I only pray when there are social obligations to engage in prayer. My philosophy now is that I’ll do a personal prayer when I feel like I need to do a personal prayer and I won’t stress things out beyond that. I don’t cut my fingernails when they don’t need cutting, it’s not a matter of good vs. bad, it’s just a do it as it’s needed thing. Prayer is similar for me.
I remember the more orthodox train of thought that called attention to how god might feel if we only reach out when we need something. What was never really discussed was how god might feel when we pray for every little thing.
It reminds me of an older Saturday Night Live skit. Some might consider it blasphemous. Viewer discretion is advised. Of course it’s an exaggeration but it gets at the point I’m driving at.
[youtube]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OaIUkv-9HiE[/youtube] There’s a case for there being more power in prayer when it’s a special event. For me, if prayers are expected or on a time table, they start to feel more rote and less special. I understand the value that prayers to start and end meetings have for many people. Much of that is lost on me. I’m not going to feel bad about it though. I’m just different.
Edit: and of course prayer doesn’t have to be about asking for things or even thanking for things. That’s just the formula that we’re more accustomed to.
That was funny. But, blasphemous. She forgot about praying to help her find the car keys.
I still like doing blessings of comfort and father’s blessings. On the occasions that I pray with my family, I think that I am doing something similar. My words are an expression of appreciation and comfort for the benefit of the other people in the room.
In the event that I were to pray alone, I think it would be an exercise in self-soothing with mixed results.
Yes, I have experienced a change in my attitude to prayer. It is a practice now that is born out of frustration with not getting answers to my prayers.
I now give a long list of prayers for people I know who have needs. Often I pray for things that they tell me they would like me to pray for. And I go through that list every night when I first go to bed.
The other thing I do is give a long list of thanks for often mundane things, and sometimes big, good things that happen.
For a while, I would then pray for ONE THING for myself, and I would give it a time limit before I stopped praying for it. This was interesting because a couple things I prayed for steadfastly actually happened in a way that I attribute to God.
I am thankful for this discussion thread, MM, because it reminds me to go back to that “single personal petition” with a time limit. Thanks MM!
It is interesting how topics come up on this site & in our personal lives. I just received a text message from an old friend. He’s Jewish. This was his text:
Quote:Been thinking about you…I am fighting cancer. Prayers please. Bob
Prayers bring focus when there is a specific need I think.
Even when I can’t or don’t pray for my own needs or wants, I can for another friend
or family member.
I wonder how God feels about that.
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