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My daughter’s primary teachers are grouchy. The ward is small and does not have many people. The whole primary presidency is really cranky and complains about it. I was really excited and have been taking her to Sunbeams since January. I was okay with them being cranky, but now it is just making me feel uncomfortable. Three weeks ago, I was 1 minute late to pick DD up after Relief Society, and my DD’s primary teachers had let her out early. DD was waiting in the hall, without anyone even watching her. The teachers were nowhere to be seen. I let it go, and tried not to be overly sensitive about it. So, the next week, I left RS early to make sure I picked DD up on time. The primary teachers asked me, “Which one is yours?” I have been taking DD there for almost 4 months and they did not even connect that she was my daughter! They would have released any of the children to me. I am so disappointed, because DH doesn’t go, and I was so excited for DD to be in Sunbeams. It is nice that DH supports me in not having DD go, and it also give DH ammunition against the church. It just makes me feel uncomfortable to leave DD there when I feel it is unsafe.
I don’t feel like I’m that uptight. I was fine with DD in nursery in previous wards. They paid attention, knew her name, didn’t release her to sexual predators.
I’m not going to talk to the leaders about it, because I’m kind of shy and the leaders are kind of cranky, I’d rather just not take her. I think they should require a background check for teachers, or, at least, matching hand stamps for parents and kids like at Chuck E. Cheese.
😆 buffyvs, fwiw, I don’t think the hand stamp idea will catch on. That’s just my opinion, but it comes from all sides of the issue for over 20 years. (We have six kids – youngest almost seven, so I’ve been there and tackled the same issue in more than one ward.) I agree 100%, however, that the teachers need to know each child and accompanying parent. The Church guidelines have been beefed up significantly in the past few years specifically to ensure the safety of the children, so I would suggest the following:
If you are too shy or hesitant to speak with the Primary leaders or Bishop about it yourself, talk to someone who trust who will take your concerns seriously – someone who will feel comfortable talking with the Primary leaders and/or the Bishop without mentioning you by name. Again, personally, I don’t think a formal identification process like stamps is feasible, but the overall concern is TOTALLY valid and should be brought to the leaders’ attention.
Good luck. This is an important issue.
I agree with Ray. I would be sure to get someone to address it, if not for your child, for the rest. It’s too bad people are cranky. As the bumper sticker says “Mean people suck.” Good luck! If you can’t be nice to little kids, you shouldn’t accept a calling dealing with them. Don’t let up on this issue……I’m sure your bishop would not be pleased with the situation and I expect most would take some kind of action to straighten it out. I’m sorry to hear that buffyvs. I know how hard you are trying to make it all work. Church is challenging with little children… been there, done that too. Maybe you could work on just her teacher? Try to be extra nice, or strike up a conversation. That might help the teacher connect more, and associate your daughter with you. I know you just want your little girl to be safe. You’re being a good mom.
Valoel’s suggestion is much better than mine as a first step. It’s always better to have someone get to know you directly, where each of you can learn to respect and love each other. One thing I’ve done in this situation before is to talk to my daughter when dropping her off with the teacher there. I have said something like, “Mommy will come get you after class, but until you see Mommy, you stick with Sis. so-and-so right here [indicating the teacher]. Don’t wander off. Sister so-and-so is responsible for you until I get back, so make sure you stay right with her.” The point gets made, but no conflict. hawkgrrrl wrote:The point gets made, but no conflict.
I’m one of those clueless people that really learns a lot from this kind of approach. So I recommend it if done right.
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