- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
Roy wrote:
nibbler wrote:
we approach ministering the same way we approached HT – contact your families, find out how they are doing with the SP’s goal of reading the BoM by the end of the year, and report back to the BP no later than the end of this month – those sorts of things.
Yes – that stinks. That to me seems very contrary of the spirit of what the ministering program is all about.
Agreed. It would seem they don’t get it.
I think what happened is that no one really knew what to do. They waited for direction from church HQ, it wasn’t coming because it’s not supposed to be this structured/programmed thing, it’s supposed to be what we want/need it to be. In the end I think a lot of people in our ward need it to be HT version 1.1. nibbler wrote:
I think what happened is that no one really knew what to do. They waited for direction from church HQ, it wasn’t coming because it’s not supposed to be this structured/programmed thing, it’s supposed to be what we want/need it to be. In the end I think a lot of people in our ward need it to be HT version 1.1.
The interesting part about that is that we did get stuff from SLC. Our Area Authority did a fairly extensive training with the SPresidencies (like an all day 8 hour Saturday thing) and he also came to the stake and did a thing for bishoprics, EQPresidencies, RSPresidencies and (lucky me) HC – that was a 4 hour thing. He had this whole slide presentation thing with video clips from training he got from GAs – mostly Q15. Anyway, one of the specific points was that ministering was a not a program and was not to be “progammized.” As I recall the clip that went with that was was from Oaks. So, either our AA went above and beyond or yours isn’t doing his job (or somebody is part of the Rebel Alliance).
Quote:The interesting part about that is that we did get stuff from SLC. Our Area Authority did a fairly extensive training with the SPresidencies (like an all day 8 hour Saturday thing) and he also came to the stake and did a thing for bishoprics, EQPresidencies, RSPresidencies and (lucky me) HC – that was a 4 hour thing. He had this whole slide presentation thing with video clips from training he got from GAs – mostly Q15. Anyway, one of the specific points was that ministering was a not a program and was not to be “progammized.” As I recall the clip that went with that was was from Oaks. So, either our AA went above and beyond or yours isn’t doing his job (or somebody is part of the Rebel Alliance).
We had Elder Acosta do the dog and pony show. The presentation was shown at the adult night of Stake Conference. As much as I am grumbling about GC, I really do think this Presidency is trying to make significant in-roads on de-programming the church. With the end goal of Christ centered-ness.
I am sorry your ward/Stake didn’t get the memo.
Good news is – You can just start practicing the real program. No one has to know. Just go along and do. If they get their knickers in a twist. You can just remind yourself that you know “the plan”.
Our stake conference is this weekend. I hope it will be enough to overcome the habits. nibbler wrote:
Our stake conference is this weekend. I hope it will be enough to overcome the habits.
YAY! FREE WEEKEND!! NO CHURCH!!!
I took a month off church, it may not have been enough. 
Apparently I’m in a very, very orthodox traditional ward/stake. Highlights:
SP’s goal for the stake: ministers to do an in-home visit by the end of the month. Bold. Original.
- Families have to sign this thing to prove they received a copy of Come, Follow Me – Home Edition manual. They want to ensure everyone has one. I found out during the announcement portion of SM that I was one of the people whose responsibility it was to pass them out and collect the sign-offs from each family.
- Ministers need to make sure their assigned families are praying, reading scripture, etc. It may make you feel uncomfortable but you have to ask and it’s your responsibility to see to it that your assigned families are doing those things. I’m certain home church will be added to the list of things ministers are supposed to verify.
We didn’t get the memo. We didn’t get the water at the end of our row either.
Jeez I need a new ward/stake.
End on something positive. There was a nice talk from a lady married to a Jewish man (he attends our meetings). She shared things from her perspective. It was nice, it felt more welcoming.
The more things change the more things stay the same! I believe that as long as I am involved in the church there will be people that test my boundaries. It is an exercise in escaping commitments without confrontation. Some things I can and will do, some things I cannot and will not do. It is up to me to decide which is which. Interrogating ministering families about their scripture study and prayer habits is something that I will not do.
In the end it’s just something else to put on the ignore pile. nibbler wrote:We didn’t get the memo. We didn’t get the water at the end of our row either.
Obviously. I can say the things are almost the total opposite here. These guys supposedly all get the same training from AAs who got the same training from GAs. But my wife and I can hear the same talk and sometimes when I look at her notes or she says something it’s clear we did not hear the same things.I was sitting in priesthood yesterday and they talked about how important it is to minister this month to care for families and find if there are needs out there. I thought of you nibbler and your ward.
I’m not in a place now I can really go out to meet people I don’t know and minister to them. I have the bishop assigned to be … Do I really need to minister to him?? Doubt it…more like they are assigning that to me because they want me to minister…which is an interesting thing to think about.
Bottom line…I will be ignoring their comments about how critical it is I go minister. That is just where I am now.
At least for my ward…we have so many disengaged members that i will not be the only one. And the leaders don’t really follow through so…it won’t matter anyway.
Life goes on.
Good luck with your ward. I hope they chill a bit.
Heber13 wrote:
I was sitting in priesthood yesterday and they talked about how important it is to minister this month to care for families and find if there are needs out there.I thought of you nibbler and your ward.
I’m not in a place now I can really go out to meet people I don’t know and minister to them. I have the bishop assigned to be … Do I really need to minister to him?? Doubt it…more like they are assigning that to me because they want me to minister…which is an interesting thing to think about.
Bottom line…I will be ignoring their comments about how critical it is I go minister. That is just where I am now.
At least for my ward…we have so many disengaged members that i will not be the only one. And the leaders don’t really follow through so…it won’t matter anyway.
Life goes on.
Good luck with your ward. I hope they chill a bit.
For me in this situation I’d either do what you plan, or I might approach the person in church and tell them “Merry Christmas” and perhaps ask if there’s anything they need, or if they don’t go to church I might call and do something similar. I really do think our EQP and bishop get it and they have made no such statements about going out to visit because it’s a special month or anything. I will probably send Christmas cards to my families.
This subject came up again this Sunday. The BP, using the EPQ as his mouthpiece, overruled my desire to opt out of ministering and made assignments for me. I give them credit for trying to be accommodating, this time the assignment is a family that lives about a mile away. They’re trying to make it easy for me. While I appreciate that, I still have this
sighhere we go again feeling. I got lucky though, my entire family was out sick this Sunday so they couldn’t spring the news on me at church and get a live reaction this time.
I’m thinking the best approach at this point might be to talk with the BP directly instead of the EQP getting caught in the middle.
This has become a little too weird for me. I appreciate the efforts to be inclusive, if that’s what it is, but things like this run counter to any desire I’d have to reintegrate more fully into my ward. It’s my lens, I know I’m more sensitive than most to what I feel are abusive behaviors and these sorts of experiences serve as reminders how elements of our culture can be abusive. In this instance, not accepting someone saying “no.”
I’m certain that leaders are also thinking of my son. He’s of age to be a minister now and I’m 110% certain that they’d rather keep us as companions as opposed to putting him with someone else. I’m sure it weighs on their mind from a perspective where they don’t want another youth to “fall away” because they aren’t doing the things that we’re told we should be doing. It weighs on my mind as well.
Today was full of irony in this department in our home. My post-Mo husband decided he would try 6 weeks of church, based on two hour church and the other things. So far it’s been a strike out. If there is an Adversary – he is working overtime on hubby’s behalf. The corker was today. Dry Council Sunday – the speaker, a former friend. He is polished as a deliverer and there he was waxing eloquent on “reaching the one”, “finding the lost..sheep, penny, person”, “ministering”. In 15 years, this brother has never reached out – even though we went to bat for his kids in their teens, even though we taught seminary when he was coming up in the ranks, even though his wife and I spent years being the “go to” team for musical programs on ward and Stake levels. “When saw he us and came to friend us.”
It was too much for my husband. It really hurt. I know all the traditional answers, but it is painful to be talked about while you sit in a room, as if you weren’t there or that somehow your issue isn’t “the right issue”.
I totally believe that being good to others, helping others, being kind to others, reaching out in friendship and courtesy – really is life changing and world healing. I could soap box on it for hours, but forced relationships
I am stopping before I go further.Good luck friend Nibbler. Sincerely.
This Sunday at church, like most recently, was very “meh.” I did get to talk to my missionary son for the second time since the rule change and it was again great. I reread my most recent post on this thread. I did not send Christmas cards to my assigned families. My MO has been to speak to them at church, at least a “how ya doin?” That’s been pretty much it. Again, our stake and ward have made no overt or covert statements about actually requiring visits although I know lots of Old Guards who can’t let that go and still don’t get (and to some extent can’t deal with) no one is counting. I do have one hardcore inactive assigned to me. She lives nearby, and I sometimes see her in the yard or at the store. She gets a wave, perhaps a “Hi” if we pass in the aisle. Once in a great while she strikes up a short cordial conversation. With a long cold winter I haven’t seen her lately. In my last ministering interview I was asked about her and said just that – we haven’t been out walking, she hasn’t been out working in her yard, I haven;t seen her. The EQC said I should try to make contact, and I reiterated what I said when she was first assigned – that I would do nothing more than what I have done. She’s a nice enough lady but wants nothing to do with the church. If he presses again I’ll have to be more blunt (I can be blunt in real life too) and just say of they want more than that she needs to be reassigned to someone who will do it because I won’t.
The kid thing: my sons were AP age when I was inactive. My wishes to not be assigned were honored (I think more because they thought I was an apostate than anything else). My sons were assigned to someone else, but home teaching was never anywhere near great in our ward and their assigned companions never took them.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.