Talking to people about your doubts

[Anonymous]

First, welcome to the forum. Great bunch of people here. I’ve told a small number of people face to face about the true extent of my doubts, including my wife who is orthodox. However, I’ve told a fair number of people in my ward and stake that I believe many things are symbolically true or figuratively true instead of literally true. It’s been a useful way for me to feel like I’m being honest without raising alarms. Also, when talking to people about my doubts I try to not criticize them or the church directly or I’ll try to also bring up things I love about the church to sort of “balance” my statements.

In general, I don’t feel the need to share the fact that I’m unorthodox – people can figure that out when they talk to me.

[Anonymous]

Always Thinking wrote:

I really want to be able to talk to family about it so I can get input from them. My mother especially because she is my best friend, right below my husband. She is seriously the sweetest person I’ve ever met and we talk about everything. So now that i’m doubting, idk how to tell her. You see, she’s a general ‘worry-wart’ (as she calls herself) and has anxiety, which is under control but she stills worries about everyone because she cares so deeply. So I don’t want her to worry about me leaving the church or something, because I don’t think I will, but I will most likely not be the typical Mormon at least for a while. I also know that eventually I will tell her because I have failed many times at keeping my struggles to myself when it comes to people that I tell everything to and feel comfortable with, like my mom.

There’s lots of good advice here, but I’ll just comment on the mom thing. I also don’t want to upset or hurt my mom, but I want to share what’s happening with me. I find that the more comfortable I am, the less anxious, “worry-wart” and feeling responsible she is. It might be good to take a little more time to get comfortable.

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