Temple difficulties

[Anonymous]

ydeve wrote:

kate5 wrote:

I just wish I could belong to a religion that didn’t make going to a family member’s joyful wedding such a stress and burden. Why should I even have to ask the question “Am a worthy to go to this wedding?” It just doesn’t seem right to me. (Sorry for the rant)

Why is the church so resistant to having American marriage ceremonies outside the temple and then have the sealing inside? It would avoid so many hard feelings, and it’s the way it’s done in most countries.

I have no idea ydeve. And if you are the one getting married and you really want your nonmember or “unworthy” family members to see you get married, you are “punished” by having to wait a year before you can be sealed. It just seems cruel.

[Anonymous]

plainandtall, welcome to the group. You said:

Quote:

But now a close family member has gotten engaged. She’ll be married in the temple. I’ll be expected to go.

I see a couple options:

– talk to your close family member. She maybe understanding about your situation. She probably doesn’t want you to do something you’re uncomfortable with.

– “go & gut it out”. Go, support your friend, think about something else. There are things we can do for 2 hours, knowing that something good comes out of the experience. ie the dentist. Easier said

than done. My wife doesn’t like going to the temple. I do like like it because I’m out of my normal world. In the process, I try to find something new & focus on that. I don’t take it all that serious &

I like the idea that families are connected over eternity. But, that’s me.

– give an excuse why you can’t go. “The dog ate my TR.” Then buy a dog, put peanut butter on the TR & put it in the dog’s dish.

Let us know what you decide & how it worked out. I wish you the best.

[Anonymous]

Roy wrote:

plainandtall wrote:

I wanted (and still want) an eternal marriage…..But I can’t accept so many things in the temple. It’s an issue that I think about daily. It adds significant distress to my life

Is it possible for you that your eternal marriage has little or nothing to do with the temple?

Once I considered this, a whole new world opened up. I haven’t banished the temple from my life, but was like tumblers in a lock. Now my real self and my “church” self – the one full to bursting with lessons about the temple – can coexist.

plainandtall, re. garments: I don’t wear them all the time and don’t answer more than “yes” to the TR question. I am at peace with that. There are several threads here on the subject.

[Anonymous]

I am determined not to let the church interfere with my close relationships. They come before the church. So, I might be inclined to do what is necessary to help this other person feel you are supportive, keep your relationship intact, and preserve peace. Look at your compliance with the ceremony as an act of service and sacrifice to others.

If you decide not to go, assess the extent of the the injury is to the relationship. if it is not severe, then dont’ worry about ti. If you decide to go, the injury is to your own beliefs about the role of women, for that brief period fo the week. I would make the sacrifice during that brief period if my relationship to the other person was that important to me.

[Anonymous]

Ann wrote:

Once I considered this, a whole new world opened up. I haven’t banished the temple from my life, but was like tumblers in a lock.

Well said, Ann.

In all honesty, I feel like that is what God wants from me…to have a new world opened up, to find my spirituality in ways that works for me to be closer to Him.

At some point, you realize the roadmap and checklist that others outlined to help you in your journey are coming from their perspective. It’s helpful to have these tools, but they are not to be used instead of our own mind and decision making for our circumstances.

For some people, the temple just isn’t going to be the best place to find God or peace. Others may never understand that…but they have their Liahona…you have yours.

God is greater than the temple, or the church. He can be found in other places, He can be found in the mountains, he can be found in our hearts. It’s ok to not like the temple. Seek God in your life, however you find him.

[Author]

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