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katielangston wrote:
Here’s the rub: without going into too much detail, I’ve been personally damaged by certain church policies and teachings that, as far as I can tell, have come straight from the top. Though I’ve been able to reject the teachings as false or inapplicable in my life, there are moments that the past pain still eats away at me. These moments are much fewer and “far-er” (haha, not a word I know) between these days, but it’s still a hurdle I can’t quite see my way over.The thought process usually goes like this: how can policies and teachings that caused me so much unnecessary agony come from God? The answer: they didn’t. So how can people who support and perpetuate these damaging concepts be prophets?
I am afraid it is inevitable the more strict the culture or doctrine is the more it is going to hurt some or leave others on the outside. Not saying it should be loose and free but the more narrow it is the more causalities there will be. This does not make things wrong or right just difficult.
UPDATE: My temple recommend interview is TONIGHT!! I’m excited but nervous. Would appreciate any extra prayers… 
katielangston wrote:UPDATE: My temple recommend interview is TONIGHT!! I’m excited but nervous. Would appreciate any extra prayers…
I shall pray for you. Best wishes!!HiJolly
I prayed and expanded my soul for you. I prayed and expanded Tom’s soul for you. 
You’re busted! Everyone…I passed! I feel extremely happy and at peace. I’m a card-carrying Mormon again! Hooray!!!
I had my recommend interview last night. And it worked at the temple today. So maybe what I am going too say isn’t too crazy. Bishops and Stake Presidents want short simple answers like “yes” and “no” without all the details. You can make another appointment to talk about the whys and details. For the questions you just can’t answer with Yes or No; the phrase ” Earnestly Striving.” works extremely well because the phrase in one of the question. katielangston wrote:Everyone…I passed!
I feel extremely happy and at peace. I’m a card-carrying Mormon again! Hooray!!!
I’m ao happy for you!
KK, I just went through the process and got mine tonight, too. I concur. They really seem almost anxious about answers other than “yes” and “no.”
Although, I don’t feel very good about having a TR. I feel like not myself.
Katie, I am SO happy for you. I’m sitting in my office with tears in my eyes hoping nobody sees me and asks about it – since I am in the Midwest and don’t work with anyone who would understand. Thank you for sharing. As a friend and as an admin here, right now “my cup runneth o’er”.
Thanks everyone!
Very cool, thanks for sharing!! That is really cool Katie. I am very happy for you — not so much about having the recommend or not, but that YOU are at peace with having it or not. Does that make sense? Of course I am happy too for your “passing” and all. Let me share a story of how I got a temple recommend after 15 years of activity when I presented myself as anything BUT an active TBM. I went AWOL from the Church for 15 years because, for me, it had lost all sense of spirituality / usefulness, etc. I walked after setting thru 3 hours of meetings on Easter Sunday, when, with the exception of the prayers, the words “Jesus Christ” were never mentioned once! This was in a Salt Lake ward. I checked out a few other churches, but nothing particularly rang my bell. So I mostly soloed after that time. It enabled me to go hiking and backpacking on weekends with no guilt, and I certainly felt more uplifted than I was in all those boring meetings. I gave up on G’s and all other ties with the church. I got rid of most, but not all of my church books. But I did keep some of the outward observances. I didn’t sleep around, didn’t smoke, and drank only occasionally.
Fast forward 15 years later. I was taking a Sunday walk, enjoying a pleasant walk thru the neighborhood. As I passed a Mormon Church, I felt the distinct impression that I needed to go to Church. It was clear enough, that I decided to pay attention. So I started occasionally going to Sacrament Meeting, always ward-hopping and never letting anyone nab me. I certainly didn’t want to get proselytized. This went on for a couple of months feeling OK, but then I got another distinct impression. I needed to go talk to my Bishop. I didn’t even know the guy! but since my ward was literally next door, it wasn’t hard to find who it was.
The bishop turned out to be a kindly man who was a good listener, and not inclined to pressure or judge. He let me vent a bit, as I described my disappointments and reservations about Mormondom. For the most part he actually agreed. I had a couple of these sessions with him, when something else came bolting out of heaven and into my tiny little brain. I got engaged (at age 47) to a lady who not only was active LDS, she was a temple worker! Although we had known each other for 17 years and were best of friends, we had never thought of marriage (at least at the same time), until now. I had shared with her my heresies throughout the years She said she would be happy to marry me, anywhere I wanted, and offered one venue where we could do it very inexpensively. Every year she went to a family reunion in Tennessee. There were 2-3 ministers of various protestant religions who would do it free. They met at a Summer Camp in the hills that is very beautiful and scenic for a wedding. But she also asked if I would ask my Bishop what it would take to get a temple recommend. Well with an offer like that, I couldn’t help but want to indulge her request.
I went to the interview having absolutely no expectations. But I certainly was well aware of the improbability of me getting a recommend. The Bishop was amazingly not shocked by my request. We talked for some length about the interview questions, and my most common response was “I really don’t have a problem with it” even though I obviously had no enthusiasm for it. Once we had chatted about the questions, he said, let’s now go thru the questions formally. I’ll read the question and you give me a straight yes, no, or earnestly trying without other explanation. I did, and he then paused for a few minutes for a silent prayer asking God’s input. Then he announced he felt good signing the recommend. He then counseled to give one word answers to the Stake President, who loved to get into the details. But my Bishop counseled against such discussions with him. The was a prosecuting attorney by profession, and not very tolerant of people who didn’t toe the line.
My bishop also asked me to start paying tithing, attending Church, and wearing my G’s again. I told him I would as best I could. It has been 17 years since that happened. He knew what I was Moving out of state to where my fiance lived so follow-through was entirely up to me. Since then I have learned to stand on my own feet visa vie Mormondom, I do those things I committed to do to my Bishop, but not as other people think I should, but as I think I should. But every time I renew my temple recommend I review the questions before hand (they’re available on the internet) to make sure I feel right with them. Then I answer the questions with the simple yes, yes, no, and earnestly trying. I feel good afterward and the interviewers seem satisfied.
Wow Dash1730 … thank you so very much for sharing that deeply personal story from your life experience. What an inspiring example of being at peace, being open to new promptings from your intuition/spirit, and in being willing to explore even old areas of your life again that you left behind. I really get a theme from people who take a long break from Church like that, when they come back, there are often nice things there that they just couldn’t see before. We change so much over our life.
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