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Today was a beautiful day and I really enjoyed it. I was glad for the joy I felt, because I feel as if I have been in this faith transition too long sometimes. As I plopped down in Relief Society I was beginning that debate with myself. The lesson topic had me worried – Joseph and Hyrum. Fortunately it really didn’t ruffle me, and I was able to contribute in a sincere way to a discussion. Beyond that though were two unexpected events. The first was a conversation with a lady in my ward. When I grabbed my seat I didn’t see her stuff, I accidently took her seat, she moved next to me. After class we were chatting and she began to tell me about her kids, which ones keep in touch, which don’t. There was real hurt in her eyes as she spoke. What added to her hurt was that her active LDS kids were the ones not keeping in touch, for extended time – 6 months, 2 years. They only interact if she reaches out. I don’t know all of their history or dynamics – but it was a powerful reminder of the need to keep trying to keep family relations – even in the ugliest times. That’s extra tough when you are the one on the out because of faith crisis. But I am going to try harder to keep my heart open to my traditional believing/practicing family after this.
My second was a hymn. Fortunately even though we were having a Joseph lesson today, we didn’t sing any of the traditional hymns that often get popped out. The opening hymn though, grabbed me unexpectedly. We sang “Nearer My God to Thee.” I like it a lot but have never given it detailed thought, today though the 4th verse stuck out, particularly one line about “Bethel I’ll Raise.” I made a note in my phone to look it up when I got home. The response I found online was so hopeful to me, I thought I would share it with everyone. It’s a bit of a read but I think it’s worth it.
https://gentlyhewstone.wordpress.com/2008/06/28/out-of-my-stony-griefs-bethel-ill-raise/ I couldn’t get the link to work, but I really enjoyed hearing that you had good day at church. I tried my best to focus on the positive yesterday at church, I still heard things that caused some cognitive dissonance but it didn’t hurt as much as usual. The hymns helped me as well, we sang ” I stand all amazed” and I felt a swell of emotion as I sang, in a good way. I’ve had a lot of emotions swell at church lately, but not many of them have been good. Thanks for the reminder about the importance of family relationships, that is one of my motivators as I strive to staylds. I couldn’t get the link to work, either, so I hope you don’t mind me pasting it in: Quote:
“Out of my stony griefs, Bethel I’ll raise”June 28, 2008 by Huston
My favorite hymn is “Nearer My God To Thee.” For those who may have only ever encountered this song aurally or reading it as it’s arranged in a hymn book, try looking at it as a simple poem:
Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee! E’en though it be a cross that raiseth me; Still all my song would be nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
Though like the wanderer, the sun gone down, Darkness be over me, my rest a stone; Yet in my dreams I’d be nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
There let the way appear steps unto heav’n; All that Thou sendest me in mercy giv’n; Angels to beckon me nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
Then with my waking thoughts bright with Thy praise, Out of my stony griefs Bethel I’ll raise; So by my woes to be nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
Or if on joyful wing, cleaving the sky, Sun, moon, and stars forgot, upwards I fly, Still all my song shall be, nearer, my God, to Thee, Nearer, my God, to Thee, nearer to Thee!
The first two verses are pretty standard: they proclaim to the Lord that no matter what kind or degree of suffering the speaker may be called to pass through (“E’en though it be a cross” and “Though…darkness be over me, my rest a stone”), he or she will still strive to seek out and follow God’s way. It might be a cliche of religious thought, but it’s an important one, and phrased quite poignantly here.
In fact, I like how, in the first verse, the image of the cross “raising” someone towards God implies that enduring hardship itself can be a spiritual growth experience, a truth that we can too easily forget when we’re in the midst of such trials. This hymn helps me remember that. That first verse then goes on to proclaim that, even if it’s the suffering of the cross that draws us near to God, we’ll still worship Him in song and seek to draw even nearer. Now that’s piety.
The last verse takes this to the other extreme: if and when we fly through heaven towards God, in the very moment of inheriting our eternal salvation, we should still plead to become more unified with His will through our submission. So at both ends of the spiritual spectrum–abject suffering and absolute ecstasy–and at all points in between–our lives are to be spent focused on bringing ourselves more in line with the will of God and joyfully worshipping Him as we do so.
That alone would make it one monumentally great hymn. But it gets even better. The fourth verse is what makes this supernal work of pious poetry my favorite part of the hymnal canon.
Sandwiched after the diligent declaration that our every waking thought should resonate with praise and before the insight that our “woes” will be used as instruments in training ourselves in cheerful discipleship, this powerful spiritual thought appears: “Out of my stony griefs, Bethel I’ll raise.”
This one line has actually come to me and offered comfort at challenging times of my life. One one level, I appreciate it merely as a clever pun: Bethel was a holy place in the Old Testament, most notably as the site of the stone altar that marked the place where Jacob saw the Lord in a dream (Genesis 28:16-22). The line in the song, then, may be understood metaphorically as a commitment to persevere in trials (“out of these stony griefs”) by turning our sorrows over to the Lord, even to the point of somehow employing them in His service (“Bethel I’ll raise”); but it can also be read literally as a historical reference to Jacob.
The idea of “stony griefs” becoming building materials in the construction of a life of praise is very attractive to those of us occasionally inclined to melancholy.
And you just thought it was a nice little song to listen to while the Titanic was sinking…
That is inspiring to hear that you had a great day at church. I will note that i struggled a little on Sunday. I should say that i dread fast and testimony meetings. For one reason im sort of a private person i could never stand up and tearfully bear my testimony in front of a room full of people i really dont know that well. I always felt like somehow my testimonies lacked. Yesterday no one really wanted to get up and bear testimonies so that made it worse!! I will describe one that was shared that really bothered me. There is an elderly member, a man, that frequently gets up and shares every month. Well this month he shared a story about a girl he met at a store. He got all personal with this young woman and was asking if she was married or single. He asked if she was living with her boyfriend “in sin”. What really got under my skin was that everyone was chuckling and laughing as he told this testimony…including the Bishop. Like somehow we, church members, are better than her because she is having relations with her boyfriend without being married. I should note that he NEVER ONCE TRIED TO SHARE THE GOSPEL WITH HER. I thought it was very judgemental and it rubbed me the wrong way. I came home last nite wondering how i would be received if i met a man and transgressed and had a baby out of wedlock. I resolved it would make me want to leave the church. Then i got to thinking about all the single mothers (who had their kids out of wedlock) who have recently converted to the Gospel that were sitting in the chapel. I wonder how they felt? It sortof changed my opinion of the people in the audience that laughed the whole way thru his testimony. How are we to encourage people who have “sinned” into repenting and joining the church if they have to listen to that? Very disturbing.
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