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I am having a bit of a verbal trigger finger at the moment and your response to Sheldon in the Prop 8 thread saved me. The events of the past week or so are really pulling my patience. I am heart broken over 6 burned churches, one bible class massacre, and the strain of the SCOTUS decisions. For the private record Sheldon gets under my skin. I try not to let him but he does. I felt like he was thread jacking in a nasty way. Maybe he wasn’t but I am a little sensitive at the moment. I am happy for my LGBT friends and hurting for my scared friends. It’s a weird middle way place to be.
Anyway Heber – I didn’t want to thread jack the conversation again by thanking you there, so I will sincerely do it here. Thank you.
Sheldon is, at best, a borderline troll. It has been a long time since he has been a positive contributor here. I just read your response to him, and I thank you. I felt like Gerald was asking a sincere question, he doesn’t post often and the side track – well you know my feelings. Thank you. I am grateful beyond words.
You’re welcome mom3. Sometimes I’m not sure any of my words make sense or will help anyone. I guess it is good today for me to hear that sometimes they do help someone besides just helping me get the thoughts out. We are having interesting discussions, and many are heart wrenching. I am having them with my daughter and other kids also. It is not easy. Seeing some responses and actions by people, where it gets nasty mud slinging to actual violence and burning things…it is sad.
Seeing the church people involved in things is difficult.
I wish the church was the beacon on the hill, the light above the worldly chaos and hatred, the wisdom the world lacks so greatly.
I wish it was clear and easy and certain.
Navigating the waters when I don’t believe the church is those things, frankly, scares the hell out of me.
That is how I’m feeling today.
But I have hope things will be OK. I’m trying to give that hope my kids too. I have my opinions, I don’t think being passive and having no opinions will help. I have to fight for what I believe is truth, and I now fight against some of my fellow church members who disappoint me on the LGBT issues.
Hang in there, mom3. Feel free to post behind the scenes here if you wish or PM and express your doubts and fears. It is nice when we have friends to support us when needed. I need it at times. I’m sorry it has been a hard week for you. Your work here is appreciated.
Your thoughts help a lot. You seem so clear to me. I admire that. I hope someday to be the same. For now I am just knots of emotions. I will probably take you up on the PM offer as I go along. I too wanted to be a part of the Beacon on a Hill. Filled with warmth, joy, love and light. Inside me I know this present moment will pass. I know there is always a bigger fish down the pike.
I will keep your invitation close to my heart.
Thanks. Tons to still think about.
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