- This topic is empty.
-
Posts
-
Rix wrote something in another thread I want to copy here – with my own very short commentary: Quote:It’s never easy to associate with those that might even make fun of your beliefs
Keep that in mind whenever you feel like belittling a “TBM” and his/her beliefs.
Great point, Ray! It’s hard, after disaffection, to avoid the very black/white thinking that we abhor: we just see it as the opposite. Also, in stage 4, it’s hard to recognize how someone in stage 3 can still be there, especially when they know most, if not all, of the same things that we know in stage 4. It becomes a combination of charity and recovery of emotional health, that allows us to accept rather than expect.
I’m kind of wondering what the limits are here. For example –
When is something fair comment, and when is it prejudice?
Or when is it alright to have a laugh about something, and when does this go too far?
I can see the opposite ends of these spectrums (spectra?!), but where is the line between right and wrong here.
No idea, Sam. I try hard not to draw universal lines where I don’t think they belong. I try to understand a correct principle and then govern myself. SamBee wrote:I’m kind of wondering what the limits are here.
For example –
When is something fair comment, and when is it prejudice?
Or when is it alright to have a laugh about something, and when does this go too far?
I can see the opposite ends of these spectrums (spectra?!), but where is the line between right and wrong here.
IMO, I think intent and context is a factor in deciding that.When it gets into something that is demeaning and hurtful, and especially if it perpetuates ideas that will lead to future demeaning and hurtful comments…it needs to be corrected and stopped.
Having said that…I’m a big proponent of being able to laugh at myself and my religion…and not be hypersensitive to make everything hurtful.
SamBee wrote:I’m kind of wondering what the limits are here.
The best we could do was write up some Rules of Etiquette and a Mission Statement for this site:
http://forum.staylds.com/viewforum.php?f=7 The overall goal is to keep things positive, productive and generally uplifting. It’s OK to be upset and angry, but the discussions here have to loop back around eventually to finding solutions to problems, not just wallowing in them.
We like to have fun and also be serious when we need to. We really try to communicate with people and work things out if something seems to cross the line.
Sam, I read your question as the generic “here” (with regard to this topic in general) – while Brian appears to have read it as the specific “here” (with regard to this forum). See, even in this community, it’s easy to read even simple things differently. Makes it a little easier to understand why one of my mantras is to parse charitably – especially when the message is more complicated than defining “here”.
Old-Timer wrote:Rix wrote something in another thread I want to copy here – with my own very short commentary:
Quote:It’s never easy to associate with those that might even make fun of your beliefs
Keep that in mind whenever you feel like belittling a “TBM” and his/her beliefs.
Excellent point, Ray! When I wrote that, I did consider the issue both ways…and I admit there was a time I had an attitude of condescension towards the literal TBM. It was hard to involve them in my social life, as some things my circle of friends say and do may be offensive to some TBMs.I was able to get past that a bit last summer when we hosted a neighborhood BBQ. I was very pleasantly surprised how well everybody got along…and how friendly we all have been with each other since then. I made it a point to get involved in conversations that were a little uncomfortable…and found that people with a beer, or glass of wine, were rubbing shoulders with the TBMs…and vice versa.
The way I see it today is that we all have a perception of life’s purpose…and they may all be completely wrong! But it is our own, and it works for each of us, so let’s just respect the other for their’s and rejoice in the happiness it brings them.
Rix wrote:The way I see it today is that we all have a perception of life’s purpose…and they may all be completely wrong! But it is our own, and it works for each of us, so let’s just respect the other for their’s and rejoice in the happiness it brings them.
Good point Rix. And good reminder, Ray.
I caught myself in sacrament meeting a few weeks ago picking a part the speaker and shaking my head at what I totally disagreed with the things he was saying…and had to remind myself to be careful not to become prideful that I think I know more than he does, or my ideas are more valid than his.
There is a difference between not agreeing with others, and vaunting my ideas uncharitably.
Quote:One of the most serious forms of “vaunting” is the sin of pride. “Pride is a ‘my will’ rather than ‘thy will’ approach to life,” says President Ezra Taft Benson. “The opposite of pride is humbleness, meekness, submissiveness (see Alma 13:28), or teachableness. … With pride, there are many curses. With humility, there come many blessings.” (Ensign, May 1986, pp. 6–7.)
We may vaunt ourselves in other ways. If we interrupt someone or whisper during a meeting, class, or performance, we may convey disrespect for what others are saying or doing. If we are late for an appointment, we may show that we consider our time or other activities more important.
We also vaunt ourselves if we take credit for what we haven’t earned. Some people blame God when things go badly in their lives and take the credit when things go well, overlooking the fact that their talents, skills, and possessions are gifts from the Lord.
http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=7bf9d7630a27b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD ” class=”bbcode_url”> http://www.lds.org/ldsorg/v/index.jsp?hideNav=1&locale=0&sourceId=7bf9d7630a27b010VgnVCM1000004d82620a____&vgnextoid=2354fccf2b7db010VgnVCM1000004d82620aRCRD Hi guys, just to clarify, by “I’m kind of wondering what the limits are here.”, I was meaning “I wonder what the limits are with this particular subject”. So not specifically on this board, but in all instances dealing with beliefs. I feel there is the right to disagree and to challenge, but I have met some folk who are downright vicious with it. But I find it hard to see where the “line” is.
SamBee wrote:I feel there is the right to disagree and to challenge, but I have met some folk who are downright vicious with it. But I find it hard to see where the “line” is.
IMO, it is about avoiding turning the disagreement into a competition. Don’t try to win, or make others see it the way I see it, which I quoted in my tagline from Ray.If you want to tell me you don’t agree with my ideas, and you believe something else…that’s cool.
You attack me or my family…you will get a response. That is where I draw the line.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.