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Shawn wrote:Quote:
bc_pg: Likewise someone who is not temple worthy doesn’t get to attend a child’s wedding. They either have to boycott it or endure the shame of sitting outside on the temple grounds. As you know, this lack of worthiness can be something as simple as drinking coffee or not believing the church president is literally a prophet. I haven’t had this experience yet personally, but have read accounts of people in this situation and shame is definitely a strong emotion they experience.
I have been thinking about this recently. I think the solution is NOT to allow those without recommends to attend dealings – I think the solution is allow sealings to occur shortly after civil weddings! What would be wrong with a couple having a civil wedding with as much or as little grandeur as they want and then getting sealed the next day or even later on the same day? I am pretty sure this is how it used to be. I don’t have a source, but remember reading about a couple who got married in the 40s or 50s and then travelled to a temple a week or so later.
This is exactly on point — what needs to be done. The temple sealing should be a very private, personal ceremony. It’s covenants are more between the individuals being married and the Lord. I think there should be a civil ceremony as well, where the couple is able to make the civil, legal commitments and other commitments to each other in public and as a formal part of the wedding.(check your use of ‘dealings’ versus ‘sealings’)
wayfarer wrote:you should be concerned about this. it already has had a significant impact on his self esteem, and it is abuse. forget about “over time” and “bordering”. your son is being manipulated by guilt over not being “worthy”, and is being emotionally trained to view himself as not having worth. the impact is life-long and must be addressed now.
i have spent forty plus years undoing this kind of damage. Please, for the sake of your son, stop this abuse, and help your son understand that his explorations into his nature are good and natural for a teen boy.
i also would not allow the bishop or any leader to conduct one on one private interviews about sexuality. you should be there with him, and he needs to know and say that talking about sexuality in a private adult-child setting is not appropriate and that his parent must be there. I believe, strongly, that the private interview setting of an adult with authority over a young teen is de facto abuse and is against most modern policies in BSA, schools, and non-LDS youth programs.
There must be a way to determine who may or may not administer ordinances. In general, it is NOT abuse to ask a member to refrain from partaking of the sacrament. This particular bishop, however, may be overzealous.The idea that “his explorations into his nature are good and natural for a teen boy” is half correct. While is it natural (according to the natural man), it is not good.
To me, the idea that there should not be any private interviews with youth is a politically correct overreaction in America to sexual abuse.
crl21 wrote:I wish the church would realize and talk about the fact that this “sin” is really not that serious. The problem is that in public the church equates masturbation and porn to other sexual sin which then would lead many young men to the conclusion that it is next to murder.
In my experience, it has NOT been taught that P & M are like other sexual sins.Shawn wrote:
In my experience, it has NOT been taught that P & M are like other sexual sins.Yes, we have certainly come a long way since the 80s. That is a good thing.
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bc_pg wrote:GoodMany opportunities for service. A ward often rallies around someone in need.
I want to return to this one item on the list bc_pg mentioned.I really do find that most wards I’ve ever been apart of are very, very good at this. When the rally call is given, it is amazing how Mormons respond by giving service and sometimes more than that.
Perhaps one of the downsides is that they often wait for the call. It becomes the Bishop or RS President that makes a call to action, when people could sometimes take more initiative.
But overall, I’d say it is AMAZING to see the willing hearts and hands and service offered to people within their ward.
Is it something in the teachings, or is the social support to want to show love and service…what is it about Mormonism that makes people rally around those in need so much?
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