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It’s been a while since I’ve visited the forums, but I love playing catch up and reading the recent posts here. I just wanted to update everyone that’s been supporting me with the trials I am currently facing. Today I had another meeting with my SP to discuss my personal progress. I’ve adjusted to life at home, and the initial shock and shame has mostly subsided. I’m beginning to become more comfortable in my own skin, which is something I love. I still don’t really enjoy attending church for 3 hours, and usually duck out before Elder’s quorum, but things are improving.
Whenever I meet with my SP, I can’t help but relate it to the many one-on-one meeting Harry has with Dumbledore in the Harry Potter series. Perhaps that’s inappropriate, but it makes me smile nonetheless. I feel very much like Harry when I’m sitting in the SP’s office discussing my “eternal welfare.” Anyways, today he finally brought up the disciplinary council that he has kept putting off. He explained to me that he didn’t feel like I was ready to move forward with it up until now. My SP is a genuine kind, and caring man and always seems to find small “loopholes” that bend things in my favor. So today he explained to me what his plan is. He wants to knock the DC down a notch from the Stake level to the ward level, meaning my Bishop would be the one to hold the council. He explained to me that since I am a Melchizedek priesthood holder, the bishop will not have the authority to excommunicate me. This seems to be the angle he’s going for here. I’m not complaining though because it will greatly decrease the amount of men that will have to hear all about my “sins” (from 16 to 4). He then explained the possible outcomes of a Bishop held DC to me. After it’s over, they can decide to: 1. Take no action; 2. Formal Probation (consisting of a record put on file); 3. Disfellowship; or 4. If they felt the need, they could suspend the council and pass the responsibility back to the Stake President, where excommunication could take place. Personally, out of all of these outcomes, I feel like #3 will be most likely. However, I couldn’t help but cringe a little as my SP explained the conditions of disfellowship. He explained that I wouldn’t be allowed to give talks in church…
:thumbup: , pray in church…:thumbup: , sustain leaders in callings…:eh: , etc. But he seemed pretty excited to also let me know that I could still wear the temple garments and pay tithing…🙄 Perhaps my head is in the wrong place, but I don’t really believe in paying tithing to the Church anyways.
Here are my main reasons for this belief. First off, I have a hard time paying tithing to such a wealthy organization when they hashed out 4 Billion dollars to build the new City Creek shopping center in downtown, Salt Lake City. It recently opened and I checked it out with some friends… but it just didn’t sit right with me. It’s a beautiful place… but I just can’t come to terms with the LDS church owning a mall. How does that fit into the Eternal Perspective of things? I’m sure consumerism is at the top of Gods list. The Church claims no tithing money was used to fund this project, but then I ask myself, why didn’t they use the 4 billion dollars for humanitarian projects or likewise? Salt Lake was doing fine with the Gateway Mall… there wasn’t really a need at all. There are millions of God’s children starving to death or living in unsanitary conditions. I witnessed to much of this in the Philippines. It just makes me sick to think about it. I would much rather donate 10% of my income to charities that benefit my fellow men. And just another thought… As a missionary, I noticed that the Church loves to use Christ’s parable of the Widow’s might when teaching about tithing. There was a very large focus on Tithing during my stay at the MTC. More than one visiting general authority gave devotionals about the importance of it. Well, it’s interesting because in the Widow’s Mite parable, the widow gives all that she had, and she paid it with her heart. She didn’t just give 10% of what she had… so where does the 10% come from?
The tithing rant is a little off topic, so forgive me, but that was one of the major things that stuck out to me in this week’s meeting with the SP. I feel calm and collected, and really just want to know what’s going to happen to my standing with the Church. Really, at heart I feel like I’m inactive in the orthodox sense, but if excommunication can be avoided, I’ll take it. I strongly feel like I wouldn’t come back if excommunication was the outcome. I’ve stated this frankly to my Stake President, and so maybe that is why he’s choosing this approach. I wouldn’t really mind being disfellowshiped, honestly. I plan on moving back to school soon and don’t really know how much involvement I’ll have with the Church once I leave. Right now, I mostly attend to avoid conflict.
I have more to say, but I’ll leave it at this for now. I’m curious to hear what you all have to say.
🙂 Thanks for sharing the update. I was wondering how things were going lately. It sounds like you have a really good SP, as far as SP’s go. It seems like most of the angst is about not knowing. It would probably be a relief just to get it all over with. Hang in there! Whatever happens will happen. You will move on with your life either way. There’s so much more ahead of you. What Brian said. Nothing more profound, but total agreement.
CL25, thanks for the update. How is your family dealing with your situation?
I hope that situation is improving too.
You seem to be dealing with everything in a positive way.
I hope it continues.
Mike from Milton.
CandleLight25 wrote:Perhaps my head is in the wrong place, but I don’t really believe in paying tithing to the Church anyways.
Here are my main reasons for this belief. First off, I have a hard time paying tithing to such a wealthy organization when they hashed out 4 Billion dollars to build the new City Creek shopping center in downtown, Salt Lake City. It recently opened and I checked it out with some friends… but it just didn’t sit right with me. It’s a beautiful place… but I just can’t come to terms with the LDS church owning a mall. How does that fit into the Eternal Perspective of things? I’m sure consumerism is at the top of Gods list. The Church claims no tithing money was used to fund this project, but then I ask myself, why didn’t they use the 4 billion dollars for humanitarian projects or likewise? Salt Lake was doing fine with the Gateway Mall… there wasn’t really a need at all. There are millions of God’s children starving to death or living in unsanitary conditions. I witnessed to much of this in the Philippines. It just makes me sick to think about it. I would much rather donate 10% of my income to charities that benefit my fellow men. And just another thought… As a missionary, I noticed that the Church loves to use Christ’s parable of the Widow’s might when teaching about tithing. There was a very large focus on Tithing during my stay at the MTC. More than one visiting general authority gave devotionals about the importance of it. Well, it’s interesting because in the Widow’s Mite parable, the widow gives all that she had, and she paid it with her heart. She didn’t just give 10% of what she had… so where does the 10% come from?
Good points.I hadn’t considered that the Widow gave ALL she had.
And it’s written that “without a parable spake he not unto them.”
My guess is that Jesus wasn’t as worried about money as about one’s heart.
So the widow’s mite symbolically represented giving one’s all to God who is Love.
And it’s also written that
“Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these, ye have done it unto me…& Inasmuch as ye have NOT done it unto one of the least of these, ye have NOT done it unto me.”
Deut 14:28-29 specifically states that 1/3 of tithes are for the poor (this scripture is left out of LDS bible index/dictionary) & it’s estimated that less than 1% of LDS funds go to the poor (& not a penny of tithes).
This breaks my heart because never before in history has there been so much poverty!
Almost 1 Billion are starving & tens of thousands die every day.
http://www.worldhunger.org/articles/Learn/world%20hunger%20facts%202002.htm Hi CL, glad to see you’re back. I keep you in my prayers as always. I am glad that you seem to have decent leadership around about there. That’s always important.
Yes, the tithing thing is hard to stomach, agree, for the reasons you mention. But I do think the church has a lot of overheads. Electricity bills for one.
Quote:She didn’t just give 10% of what she had… so where does the 10% come from?
To be fair, this is not the church’s definition of tithing. It pre-dates it, since the word “tithe” is cognate with “tenth” which equals ten percent.
I talked this morning to a friend whose son came back from his mission after three weeks in the field. I hadn’t realized that, and she said he realized he had been doing what others expected all his life and that serving a mission just wasn’t something HE wanted to do. He was miserable. He is fully active now, attends the temple and loves it, serves in a calling, etc. He’s happy. He wouldn’t have been if he’d stayed on his mission. In her words, “It worked for three of my boys and was wonderful for them, including the one we thought would never serve a mission. It didn’t work for the son we all thought was the perfect son, and his coming home was wonderful for him.”
Just thought I’d share that with you.
Hi Candlelight! I am so glad you updated us. I have been keeping you in my prayers as I know many others here have also been doing. You seem to be doing a great job hanging in there with all this. It does sound like you have a great SP! I hope your parents are working through all this in good ways. You will continue to stay in my prayers.
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