What are the odds?

[Anonymous]

SilentDawning wrote:

What I get from this, Roy, is that the answers you find, attitudes you develop, and coping mechanisms on which you rely depend largely on the “sources” you go to, in order to resolve the assumptive world collapse.

The aftermath of the assumptive world collapse seemed to be very time sensitive. When a bone breaks the healing begins and if you don’t set the bone or remove any foreign objects they may become permanent developments. Barring an assumptive world collapse, we seem to make small modifications to our worldview pretty constantly in an organic fashion (think coral reefs), assimilating new information and building upon previous experiences. Theoretically, if you restricted yourself to specific sources you may be able to form your growth in that direction (similar to using a guide stick for a baby tree or a cake pan to shape the cake) – but this may take considerable time.

If I were to attempt what you are proposing, I would go to the scriptures. I would make them “my own.” I would read them as they applied to my situation and had meaning for me. I would try to break free from traditional interpretations or emphasis. There is a whole lot more in our scriptures than our scripture mastery verses would have us believe.

For me this would be about going to the “source” in scripture study and prayer. How could such a thing not be “faithful.”

From the limited information that I have about your principle challenge, I would attempt to segregate the church from your spirituality.

SilentDawning wrote:

his own organization had let me down

Remember that the church may not be His organization in the sense of the extension of His kingdom on earth, but it can be your vehicle to deeper spirituality. You can study and pray and serve your home teaching list or by subing with the cub scouts etc. You can bear your testimony about the study/prayer/service and what it has meant in your life and how it has helped you to draw closer to the Savior. Such things form the fabric of our church life and spirituality (not to be conflated). Otherwise – to rededicate yourself to the organizational church without any “boundaries,” I would think that you would be just on thoughtless Bishop or SP away from square one.

[Anonymous]

I’m absolutely dedicated to the LDS Church – but I’ve written a lot here about my boundaries. I do what I can – and I make those determinations. Period.

[Anonymous]

SD – I think the odds are low you can return to how it used to be.

I think the odds can be very high you can return in a new and different way. Wendy Ulrich’s FAIR article presented that idea

Quote:

The fourth and final stage of committed relationships is about renewal. Not exactly a renewal of the honeymoon, but a more mature, realistic, and truly loving renewal. We come to accept our spouse or our parents or the Church, and we come to accept ourselves. We allow God to run the universe, and we become more content to let go of things we cannot change. A deeper, more mature love begins to emerge, with fewer power struggles and less disengagement. We do not need to see all the answers, and we do not need perfection by our standards in order to not be embarrassed or ashamed of our Church, our partner, or our God. We reinvest in the relationship, not because we have decided to risk yet one more time that we will not get hurt only to have the rug pulled out yet one more time from under us, but because we have learned that hurt can be survived, that this is a risk worth taking, and that it does not mean we cannot be happy or that we are irrational suckers or that we are doomed to failure because we take another chance on trust or because we fail or are failed again. We see ourselves and our partner more realistically, and we do not run from either vision. We recognize that we can be hurt by being betrayed or we can be hurt by not trusting, but we don’t get the no-hurt choice because there isn’t one, at least not until we simply choose not to read betrayal into every ecclesiastical failure, or abandonment into every unanswered prayer.

“Believest thou…?”: Faith, Cognitive Dissonance, and the Psychology of Religious Experience by Wendy Ulrich, Ph.D. [emphasis added]

…you can reconnect with a changed heart. Others may not even recognize much difference in you (although those you know well and you open up to will), but as long as you are there and you are actively participating…it won’t be much different, even though internally you may be seeing everything completely different.

SilentDawning wrote:

Ideally, I think the Savior would say you look at the people with charity, accept the hits with humility, forgive, and move on.

If that is the ideal…it is something to work towards, IMO. Don’t limit yourself that you can never achieve that, just be patient with yourself and allow yourself enough time that you are getting closer to that, little by little.

In my opinion, this part of your posts struck me most. I think there is an important element of love and hope for a happy future. Don’t try to go back to the way things used to be, look forward to a new relationship with the church…and then re-engage 100% and go for it.

[Anonymous]

I like Roy’s words:

Roy wrote:

If I were to attempt what you are proposing, I would go to the scriptures. I would make them “my own.” I would read them as they applied to my situation and had meaning for me. I would try to break free from traditional interpretations or emphasis. There is a whole lot more in our scriptures than our scripture mastery verses would have us believe.

For me this would be about going to the “source” in scripture study and prayer. How could such a thing not be “faithful.”

From the limited information that I have about your principle challenge, I would attempt to segregate the church from your spirituality.

:thumbup:

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