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just me wrote:
I am so sorry to hear about your son! I hope and pray surgery isn’t needed.
Have you found any sleep solutions? I know how important sleep is in stress reduction.
No, unfortunately. Thanks for asking though.
Any hope of a breakthrough on the sleep front? I’m sorry it is so bad with your wife. Hang in there. You can get the rest and the support you need and find your answers. Tom Haws wrote:Any hope of a breakthrough on the sleep front? I’m sorry it is so bad with your wife. Hang in there. You can get the rest and the support you need and find your answers.
Nope, sleep is pretty much non-existent right now, but then again my sofa was not designed for sleeping on for 9 months. I’m really starting to believe I need to make some huge changes in order to find the support and answers I need. I’ve tried prayer, friends, church leaders, family members, and therapists. I guess I need to find some other avenue. Thanks for asking.
(((Hugs))) Hang in there, Wendell. Give the therapy some time. Can you and your wife switch off, one night you get the bed, next you get the sofa? 
But seriously, I am so very sorry that you are going through this right now. Focus on healing yourself and on the joy you find in your children. I will keep you in my prayers.
Wendell, have you tried a sleep clinic? I don’t want to meddle or be pushy, but that idea has been on my mind so I feel I should mention it. How is your sons face? Sounds like he’ll have some “trophies.” I hope he is feeling alright!!!
just me wrote:Wendell, have you tried a sleep clinic? I don’t want to meddle or be pushy, but that idea has been on my mind so I feel I should mention it.
How is your sons face? Sounds like he’ll have some “trophies.” I hope he is feeling alright!!!
No, I have never tried a sleep clinic. I have had several appointments, but they want me to spend too much time there and my nerves can’t deal with it. I did have a study done at home once where the Dr gave me some electrodes to hook to my head, chest, back, and legs. It didn’t show much though because I didn’t sleep for a period of time that was long enough to get any effective readings.
My son’s face is pretty messed up. It’s probably going to be okay once the swelling goes down, but it is definitely not good right now. I tried to ask him about it, but he can’t even speak, and since my wife doesn’t speak to me at all, I don’t really know what’s going on unfortunately.
Thank you for asking.
Poor little guy. Mouth injuries are the worst. Hopefully, the docs can get the teeth back to normal. I have to echo Just Me about the sleep issues. Now might be a great time to go to the sleep clinic. (It would get you off the couch.)
(((hugs))) prayers and support your way! wendell, I know this might be a little direct, but I have been thinking about it this morning and feel compelled to say . . . We can and will offer all the emotional support we have to give, but the resolution of the things you have described is going to require MUCH more than we can provide. You are going to have to get professional diagnoses and help to take care of what you have shared with us. I don’t want to “burden” you more, but sometimes the simple truth is that the solution only can be found by the one needing the solution.
Whatever you have to do, please talk with others in your “physical world” about your situation and seek the trained advice and clinical help you need.
wendell wrote:I’m really starting to believe I need to make some huge changes in order to find the support and answers I need.
There is some truth in that. I am assuming your wife and you believe strongly in “marriage”. Have you considered that there is nothing “wrong” with separation? Even legal separation (like divorce, but still married, not looking to start other families). Might that be helpful? I was going through a hard time, trying to find options, when suddenly it occurred to me I had a dear, dear younger sister living no farther from my office than my own home, and with a loving family. Why it had never occurred to me to ask before if I could stay with her totally escapes me. Sometimes we don’t see things that are right in front of our eyes. I did ask, and I did stay, and it was a good thing. Think new solutions. Think new ideas.
Based on everything you have shared here, I assume you are certain (and it seems obvious) your sleep troubles are a huge symptom of a deep and pervasive (life-filling) psychological issue (childhood wound) that desperately needs real, thorough, permanent healing. Medicine may be an important part of temporary coping, and a sleep clinic may be able to help you while you heal. But haven’t you basically told us that the kind of deep, permanent change you need is spiritual, emotional, social, and psychological one healing? Can you trust hypnosis? Can you trust drug-aided psychotherapy? You are right, I feel, that you need some huge changes in order to find the support and answers you need. Only you can find them, and I know you can. You can make those changes. I love you dearly, brother. *hugs*
Hey Wendell, You’ve been on my mind. How’s it going with the therapist? How are you holding up? How is your son?
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