Women in Church Leadership: The Gap

[Anonymous]

I caught a little bit of the General Women’s Session last week. I was a bit disappointed that the messages I heard were about traditional families. There was acceptance that not everyone lives that way, but those same women were still hit over the head with needing to approach “the Lord’s pattern” of traditional lifestyle.

So, that got me thinking about what kind of women these are. It’s well known that Men at the top of the Church are, for the most part, highly successful career men: doctors, lawyers, business execs. What about these women? So, after a review of their bios, I can report that the majority of them have lived lives of privilege where ‘career’ is something their successful husband does, while they are financially free to be devoted wives and mothers and to serve callings in the Church. No wonder they see that as the “Lord’s pattern”. Most of these women have served as wives of Mission Presidents. And in case you don’t know how that works, MPs are almost always successful businessmen who are financially able to take three years away from the business back home (often while the business continues to operate under someone else’s leadership). Contrast that with most married couples in their 50’s where both the husband and wife work, with no end in site.

The breakdown:

[Anonymous]

Looks like there’s also a 5 kid minimum.

[Anonymous]

I can’t say I’m surprised at the bio info and I agree, I think they don’t relate to the common woman ( or man). I think the same of the GAs. I’m not saying we should go out make a street preacher a GA, although that might spice things up a bit, but perhaps a guy who has actually been unemployed or knows what it’s like to worry that if he paid tithing he might not be able to buy food or make the car payment.

[Anonymous]

I think a lot of them have those types of experiences but those experiences might have been limited to a few years as a young married couple in grad school. Experiences that perhaps are 40 years in the rear view mirror.

[Anonymous]

I think that’s quite a bit different than a 35-year-old with multiple kids and a mortgage, Nibbler.

[Anonymous]

On Own Now wrote:

Contrast that with most married couples in their 50’s where both the husband and wife work, with no end in site.

Hey – I resemble that remark! But to be honest, I do see an end in sight. Everyone dies. :shifty:

[Anonymous]

I will try to keep my carping to a minimum, but another area of gap, is the life without bumps. I don’t wish misery on anyone, but all during Sister Oscarson’s talk, I kept thinking back to my very TBM aunt, who in the 1970’s divorced her NOM type (even though NOM didn’t exist) husband, and took their 5 kids to Utah to raise them in Zion. My aunt has told me often that she was shunned for years as a divorced women by her ward sisters. My aunt never remarried, I don’t even know if she had a chance to get a husband. She has stayed and is valiant to Mormonism – but untraditional.

Hers is only one example. In fact someone said in their talk, I haven’t had …. – death, divorce, unemployment, cancer – you name it. Then the speaker said, “I can’t understand, but the lord can.” Wow.

I got her message, but what if you are my aunt heading to a meeting looking to be cheered on as you pull your hand cart and the speaker just says, “Hey – I haven’t a clue what your pain is, but I am passing you up to God.”

What about that whole covenant in Alma about “Mourning with those that Mourn.”? When you announce that your life has been pretty smooth sailing, the rest of us schlups, kind of don’t fit.

For the record – I have had a serene life, but I don’t think I am ahead in Gods eye one bit. I actually think he expects me to be more generous and understanding since I got a pretty good gig going on here.

[Anonymous]

Gross.

Sorry, but this irks me to high heaven.

[Anonymous]

Wow! That’s very interesting. I can’t say that it surprises me, or even really makes much difference to me, but it IS interesting. I’ve thought about the gap between the apostles and us ‘normal’ people, but I’ve never thought about the gap between the women authorities and the rest of us. It bothers me to see money as a driving factor in how far people go in the church.

[Anonymous]

Quote:

“It bothers me to see money as a driving factor in how far people go in the church.”

I have mixed feelings on this. I get the concept that those who are financially not solvent could have a host of problems in leadership roles, ranging from personal dramas and hardships that come with poverty to even sticky fingers if given access to finances while in dire straits. Basically, I am not that impressed with JS’s abilities as a financial leader, and it seems we’ve moved pretty hard and fast away from that model. If you are an itinerant farmer and you suggest that God wants us to pool our financial resources, that comes off a little differently than if you are an investment banker making that same proposition.

But I agree that there’s a potential empathy issue, particularly among the “ladies who lunch” crowd. I’m more irked that they don’t have any leadership experience outside the church.

[Anonymous]

In the past, we have had Chieko Okazaki who was a convert, mother of two, educator and principal. We had had Sherri Dew, single, very successful businesswoman and author. There was also another single sister in the General Relief Society fairly recently who was single and social worker? At one point, we did have diversity among the sister leadership. I wonder why it does not seem to be happening now.

[Anonymous]

afterall wrote:

In the past, we have had Chieko Okazaki who was a convert, mother of two, educator and principal. We had had Sherri Dew, single, very successful businesswoman and author. There was also another single sister in the General Relief Society fairly recently who was single and social worker? At one point, we did have diversity among the sister leadership. I wonder why it does not seem to be happening now.

Yep. I remember a very jovial “plump” woman that was I think a nurse and I heard 2 or 3 of her talks and just thought, “She is GREAT! We all need to hear more from her.” I can’t recall what leadership role she had.

[Anonymous]

Quote:

In the past, we have had Chieko Okazaki who was a convert, mother of two, educator and principal. We had had Sherri Dew, single, very successful businesswoman and author. There was also another single sister in the General Relief Society fairly recently who was single and social worker? At one point, we did have diversity among the sister leadership. I wonder why it does not seem to be happening now.

Two out of three of these were Gordon B. Hinckley selections. I can’t verify the 3rd but Chieko Okazaki talks about how she never met Elaine Jack until all of them had been called and were getting set apart. I don’t know if it’s the same for Sheri Dew and Sister Smoot, but I believe he had a strong hand in both.

[Anonymous]

I’m not sure they are looking for independent, experienced, vocal, and probably more liberal women – I don’t think that’s what the decision makers consider when choosing auxiliary leaders.

[Anonymous]

I’ve been waiting for a chance to share this, but didn’t think it would come so soon and I’m not positive I’m ready. But I’m going to anyway.

We recently had a change in our stake RSP. One of the counselors is a professional 30-something single woman. In the discussion it was brought up how she has been serving in her ward YWP and the young women love here. A father noted how he appreciated that his daughters were exposed to a very strong and accomplished woman who was outside the normal “Molly Mormon” mold (he didn’t use that term). Our SP replied that that is precisely why we need her in a stake level calling – so that all of the sisters can see her the way her ward does.

On a side note, but related, our ward RSP is an older divorced woman and also a professional. They’re out there folks, I wish there were more of them in top leadership positions.

[Author]

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